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Akimikoisthecutest

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Everything posted by Akimikoisthecutest

  1. Other than the fact that I'm a coward? No
  2. I failed. I did not come out
  3. Uhh, I'm about to come out to my therapist! Wish me luck!
  4. My parents put a internet time limit on my phone so I'm going to be on a lot less, sorry!

    1. Honors Spectral Image
    2. Honors Spectral Image

      Honors Spectral Image

      Glad your still with us at all thooo 

  5. Kinda, we've never met irl but we interact a lot
  6. Same! I like lavender I was chatting online today, and I got asked if I was on my period, and I had no idea what to say
  7. Lol. I was chatting online today, and I got asked if I was on my period, and I had no idea what to say
  8. Hi! Welcome to the shard! Usually we get around to meeting new members sooner than this, but.... I'm not sure what happened. Anyways, what is your favorite allomantic/feruchemical metal? What is your opinion on Wayne? PSST I noticed your pronouns and point you to the Certified gay disasters thread.
  9. The smudge on my thumb is stubborn. It’s a deep, galaxy-purple stain that refuses to wash off, a leftover mark from mapping the Iron Peaks until two in the morning. I like the way it looks against my skin—a reminder that I can build something out of nothing. I check the mirror. I don’t look for a person; I look for a vibe. The green turtleneck is clean, free of orange cat hair for at least the next ten minutes. I pull it on, feeling the wool hug my neck like armor. An orange blur streaks out of my room and leaps onto the counter to greet me. “Morning Kip,” I say, my fingers disappearing into his. He vibrates like a living radiator under my fingers. The coffee machine hisses, a comforting, mechanical hum as the first dark drops trickle into my mug. While it brews, I head back to my room for the essentials. I don’t just “check” my bag; I audit it. Maps? Smooth. Journal? Leather-bound and heavy. Purple glitter pen? Present. I settle my dice bag into the bottom—a small sack of metal polyhedral that carry more weight than my textbooks. I slide the whole kit into my backpack like I’m loading a magazine into a rifle. A ding from the kitchen tells me my coffee is done. I quickly grab my textbooks, computer, put my coffee in a travel cup, and hit the street. It’s a pretty peaceful walk today. No homophobes screaming at me. Nobody is staring, it’s just me. I made it to class in record time. It’s easy to move fast when the hallways part for you like a sea—not out of respect, but because I’m something they’re afraid to touch. Since I came out, the wide berth is the only space I’m allowed to take up. Everyone either actively avoids me or pretends like I don’t exist. I suppose it’s better than what some people go through. I’ve heard stories of people who’ve tried to hide themselves, and end up beaten or dead for it once everyone else finds out about it. I take my seat in the back, I have the whole table to myself again. Seems like this whole year is going to be a pretty boring year again. I brace myself as the bell rings, ready for my peers to torment me. Surprisingly as my peers pour into the room, nothing more than a snide whisper, and a paper tossed at my head, comes my way. , comes my way. The bell rings, a sharp sound, and my teacher says, “Alright, alright, settle down. Class, I am your teacher Mr. Hemmingsworth, and this is your AP sociology class. Now I understand that it is only the first day, but I would like you all to take out a notebook and a pencil and take notes on our class procedures.” Mr. Hemmingsworth goes on like that for a while but I tune him out. I click my purple pen. I don’t look at the empty seats around me. I look at the parchment-colored paper of my journal. I start on the Western Reach. My hand is steady as I ink in a series of watchtowers. In this world, the wide berth people give me is a moat, and the silence isn’t lonely—it’s a fortification. A crumpled note hits the corner of my table, likely filled with a word I’ve heard a thousand times, but I don’t unfold it. I don’t give them the satisfaction of an audience. Instead, I draw a nesting wyvern over the spot where the paper landed. I give it sharp, obsidian scales and a gaze that doesn’t blink. It’s easier to manage monsters I’ve created than the ones sitting in the row behind me.
  10. That is most definitely euphoria! I don't get to experience it that much but I can tell you for a fact that is undoubtedly euphoria
  11. It's still honestly shocking to get called a girl by my friends, even though some of them are also trans (I don't know any trans fems irl), but it still gives me a jolt, and I get really nervous
  12. In our corner of the internet, we spend an incredible amount of time dissecting the internal lives of characters. We analyze their growth and how their self-perception shapes the world around them. But this week, I decided to turn that analytical lens inward. I took a break from the theories to focus on a more personal project: The Pronoun Test Drive. The concept was simple: spend seven days using a new name and pronouns in a controlled, safe environment to see if they actually felt like me. While many people start this journey online, I decided to take it straight to the real world. Here’s how my first week went: I knew that for this to feel real, I needed to hear the words spoken out loud. Digital spaces are great, but there’s a specific kind of resonance that happens when a name vibrates in the air instead of just appearing in a chat box. I didn't want to make a massive announcement yet—that felt like too much pressure. Instead, I reached out to one of my best friends. This is someone I’ve spent countless hours with, someone I knew would offer grace if I felt awkward or changed my mind. I simply asked: "Hey, can you try using [Name] and She/Her for me this week when we hang out? I'm just seeing how it feels." The first few days were... intense. The first time my friend looked at me and said, "Hey [Name], what do you think about this?" my brain did a double-take. It wasn’t a bad feeling, but it was a loud one. I think we often expect a lightning bolt moment of clarity where everything suddenly makes sense. In reality, it felt more like trying on a new pair of shoes. They were exactly what I wanted, but I still had to get used to the way they changed my stride. I felt a bit of imposter syndrome—that nagging feeling that I was somehow breaking the rules of my own identity. According to resources like The Trevor Project, this initial anxiety is completely normal. We’ve spent years being called one thing; it takes more than forty-eight hours to rewire your brain so that it feels right. By the middle of the week, the novelty started to wear off, and that’s when the real magic happened. We got back into our groove, and started making pride stickers, that we always decorate our school hallways with. The name stopped being an experiment and just became my name. It started to feel less like a costume and more like a comfortable hoodie. This is the goal of the Test Drive: to see if the identity can survive the boring moments of daily life. When someone calls you by your name while you're just talking about normal stuff, and it feels right? That’s your answer. When my name was used, my chest felt lighter. I hadn’t realized how much energy I was spending "performing" my old identity until I stopped doing it. Hearing it spoken in the real world confirmed things in a way a screen never could. It made the identity feel three-dimensional. For those who aren't ready to ask a friend yet, I’ve found that even low-stakes IRL testing helps. We often say that the most important step a person can take is the next one. For me, this week was that step. It wasn't a grand, cinematic transformation—it was a series of small, quiet moments of being seen for who I actually am by someone I trust. To anyone else on the forums who is questioning, doubting, or just curious: your journey is valid. You don't owe anyone a "finished" version of yourself. You’re allowed to test, to tweak, and to change your mind.
  13. Should I get a new PFP?

    1. CoderDrag0n8

      CoderDrag0n8

      Do you want one?

      If so, DO IT

      If not, DON'T DO IT

    2. Honors Spectral Image
    3. Usseewa

      Usseewa

      If ya want, but don't feel pressured to just cuz we all did

  14. Not really. Nothing much happened although I outed myself to a new friend I met yesterday. We were all hanging out, 3 out of the 4 other people knew I was trans, so I texted the group chat with the people I knew and the new person was on one of my friends phones, so now they know.
  15. Ooh, I just noticed I'm a ghostblood now. HEHEHEHEHEH*starts coughing*

    1. Akimikoisthecutest
    2. Usseewa

      Usseewa

      Noice

      Why coughing?

  16. Happy Valentine's day! Especially to all my single Pringles out there! You'll get someone eventually! Or if you don't want a partner, then you're a step ahead of everyone else!

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Kansas Stormcursed

      Kansas Stormcursed

      No Valentine's, just beating people up

    3. CoderDrag0n8

      CoderDrag0n8

      @Kansas Stormcursed YESSSSSS

      also valentines day is great

      their should be one but for like, friends.

    4. Usseewa

      Usseewa

      Happy 💔 day!

  17. Last night I listened to a lot of Ado with my friends and heard Usseewa

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. Usseewa

      Usseewa

      Were u playin' dnd?

    3. Akimikoisthecutest

      Akimikoisthecutest

      Nah, we were just hanging out with some random anime openings playing in the background and youtube turned it into Jpop

    4. Usseewa

      Usseewa

      Ah, nice

  18. So, my Auncle is in town today and they want to meet with the whole family, and they're the singular adult I'm out to, and I came out to them the last time I saw them before they moved. I'm worried it's going to be super awkward
  19. Ok, I'll try it tomorrow Wish me luck
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