Edema Rue

Hey guys, sorry in advance for the emotional roller coaster the last couple weeks have been, I don’t know how much of it has bled onto the shard (I know some has, but definitely not all, I kind of tend to hide the bad in secret journals xD)

Anyway

Ahem

There are some moments where the emotions are too powerful to speak.

Where the tears falling down your cheeks aren’t enough.

Where the screams echoing from your hoarse through aren’t enough.

Where you are thumping your chest to try to get to your heart that feels as if it just might burst, and it isn’t enough.

Where you’re hugging someone so tight your arms are shaking, and it isn’t enough.

Where you laugh at the sky and dance through the rain.

Where you need to sing. 

There are moments when your soul wants to break free from your body and fly its way up to heaven, because this earth cannot possibly understand all that you are feeling. 

I don’t ever want to lose these moments.

I wrote an essay type thing a bit ago about being young, about how you fly and you fall; there is nothing better than flying, and nothing worse than falling. And we get so afraid to fall that we stop flying.

Don’t let me ever stop flying. I have fallen, and I will keep falling, and I will shatter and break over and over again. 

But see how I fly.

This is what it means to be alive. 

The flying,

The falling,

The feeling.

And this feeling, right now…

It’s too powerful for any words. Too powerful for a mortal body. Nothing I say can possibly explain it. 

Because next April, I will be performing in Hadestown, arguably my favorite musical of all time.

And it’ll hurt.

It’ll be a long, messy, exhausting year. 

I’ll keep falling.

But watch me fly.

“To see how the world could be, in spite of the way that it is.”

I feel so much more, but there are no more words I can say that will even begin to make you understand all that I feel right now.

So…

Know that I’ve been screaming for almost 3 hours straight and no longer have a voice.

Goodnight,

Brothers.

Goodnight.