The Awakened Salad

A while ago for fun, I decided to imagine that Yolen was actually a future version of Earth (despite Brandon confirming that Earth isn’t part of the cosmere) and that Adonalsium was the internet. Not exactly sure how you can shatter the internet though . I even came up with what some of the shards represented. Some of them don’t really make sense but oh well. Endowment = online shopping (I mean, when you buy stuff it’s similar... well... umm... it was more logical in my mind) Odium = trolling and just all of the hatred on the internet (no wonder Hoid is so scared of him) Ruin = viruses? (I didn’t really know what to put here If Wisdom is a shard, then Wisdom would represent the knowledge stored on the internet.

win’s Grammatically incorrectly,

*Wins italically* (Yes of course that is a word how could you doubt me?)

I haven't read Homestuck myself, but I've heard that Toby Fox worked on it before Undertale, so at least the soundtrack will probably be good! Is this a reference to something? Also, *wins*

Salutations

*walks up to podium, moves The Last Post from first place to second, stands on podium in first place* *wins*

Hmmm.... *wins*

I'd tell you another chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon. *wins with rainbow cake*

*Wins this cooking contest with waffles*

Ana watched as Ophelia's face darkened when she refused her request, but there was nothing to be done now. If she suddenly changed her mind, would that make her look indecisive? Pliable? She offered Ophelia a small smile. "Maybe one day," she said. She shifted her attention to the sailor, waiting for his response. She wanted to throw her arms around him when he agreed to help her. One victory for the day. "Thank you so much," she said, curtsying, slipping into old habits of etiquette. "May I ask your name?" She blushed, remembering she was talking to a sailor, of all people, and from what she'd experienced, they were the last people who cared about manners. Still, he was doing her a favor, so it was only right to be polite. "I'll go and see if I can get you two some food," she said to Ophelia and the sailor, then turned away and headed to a nearby vendor's cart. Her heart was beating quickly, excitement and nervousness tangled in her pulse. She had never really spoken to strangers before, especially on her own, but she had done it! Sure, it was still scary, but she felt accomplished, even if it was something most people would find trivial. The man running the stand smiled at her as she approached. He was grilling fish skewers. "Hello again, miss. After some work, are we?" Ana nodded, "I am, but I was wondering if you wouldn't mind... umm..." she wrung her hands together. "I know two people who are in need of a warm meal. Would it be all right if, instead of paying me, you'd give them something to eat?" She looked at the man hopefully. "I'll work extra for you. I can clean dishes, and dispose of scraps," she added quickly. Part of her berated herself for giving up money to feed two strangers. But she had already committed to it, so there was no going back. Besides, they had food at home - just a little bit - but it was probably more than Ophelia had. And the sailor - she hadn't even waited for him to tell her his name before she had rushed off! - he was going to help her with those urchins, which would help in the long run. The man smiled, "Of course, dear." He held up a finger. "I'll give you these fish skewers here, if you promise to come back and help straight after you give them to those two you were talking about. If you don't, well, I'll just tell you that I don't give away free food. Bad for business, you know." He gave Ana a hard stare, then smiled again and handed her the food. Ana took two skewers in each hand, marveling at the generosity. "Thank you," she said. "I promise I'll come right back." She turned around and started to head back to Ophelia and the sailor. As she did, she noticed a boy, around her age, run into the square and shout about a Pahn Khal man. She watched as Ophelia started, and yelled something too, but it was lost in the crowd. Ana rejoined the group and offered two skewers each to Ophelia and the sailor. "These are for you." @Sorana @I think I am here.

*is actually the true winner*

Granted, but for every thing you invent, the more dizzy you become. It starts off small, barely noticeable, but by the time you’ve created 20 inventions, you’re constantly dizzy all the time, and there is no way to get rid of it. I wish for a tablecloth.

*gratefully accepts ice cream* *Forgets that they are a salad and tries to consume said ice cream* Oh well, now I’m an ice cream salad

“My name’s Ana,” Ana said. Her mind had already started to brighten when Ophelia had offered to cut her hair. She wished she had something to pay her, aside from the almost-promise of getting her food. But if she cut her hair, would that make her stand out even more? Make her even more of an outcast? “Thank you,” she said to Ophelia. “But I don’t want to accept it right now. It wouldn’t be right if you did that for me and then I couldn’t get you any food.” “No, no! Nothing of that sort...” Ana trailed off, realising just how large the sailor in front of her was. If she managed to offend him... his hands were so big they looked like they could crush her skull. She looked down at the mud still staining her skirt. Thankfully no one seemed to notice, or there were bigger concerns than her attire. “I just wanted to ask if you could scare off some street urchins,” she said, still looking down. “They’ve been harassing my father and I ever since we moved here. I’ve tried telling them to go away, but of course that doesn’t work. They’ve stolen our food when I come home from the markets, and they throw rocks at my father’s window when he tries to sleep. I know they’re just trying to survive... but... Why do they hate us so much?” She stopped talking when she realised she was rambling. Quickly, she added, “But of course you don’t have to if you don’t want to. And I better actually get you some food first, to uphold my end of the deal.”

Granted, but this is the non-canon version of the cosmere where Earth is still part of it. TLR takes over Earth, and now all of our lives suck. I wish that I would stop procrastinating.

Thanks! As for nicknames, Salad will do

Specifically, a cat that was half shark.

Cookies and cream with rainbow sprinkles please

Before Ana could open her mouth, the thief was already returning the bag to the girl. Maybe he wasn’t so dangerous after all. The girl turned and offered the large man —obviously a sailor, from the way he spoke — a haircut. Ana frowned in thought. Of course! She was a hairdresser! However, she couldn’t help but notice how her face had brightened when Ana mentioned free food. It was be a stretch, to get free food for one person, let alone two. But the sailor had seemed willing to help, maybe she could ask a different favour. And the hairdresser... she knew all too well what it was like to go hungry. She would try, at least. She waited until the hairdresser had finished speaking, then interjected, “I can’t promise anything, but I can try and get food for both of you. There’s a food vendor I’ve worked for before. I might be able to convince him to give you two a free meal, as my pay.” Truthfully, she would’ve loved a good haircut. It had been years since she’d had one, but money was scarce, and she couldn’t afford to waste it on frivolities. To the sailor, she said “I was originally going to ask you to get her bag from the thief,” she glanced at the thief, still standing within earshot. “But that was resolved.” She thought for a moment. There was something she could use help with. “However, if you’re willing, there is one other thing....”

I would not bow before a stick, but I will before an ice cream man. You do Harmony's work, great distributor of confectionery goodness.

As soon as she walked over to the pair, Ana's resolve faltered. The boy, although looking around the same age as her, seemed much more dangerous. What was she walking into? I am not scared, she told herself. Suddenly, the girl replied. Ana blinked in shock as the girl turned back to the boy and began asking for her bag. "Thank you," she said softly, more to herself than anyone. She reached up absentmindedly and ran a hand through her short hair, before letting it rest back at her side. That compliment seemed to belong to another place, another time. Ana shook her head, refocusing. Still, something inside of her felt emboldened, the stranger's words buoying her up with courage. This boy - he seemed to be a thief. Ana considered her options. She could walk away, but that would do no good. The thief would still be there, and he would probably run off with the girl's bag. She had quick hands, but they were used to sewing and mending, not prying bags away from thieves. She could try and chase him, but she was sure she was no match for a pickpocket, who was likely skilled in avoiding pursuit. She shook her head, straining for something, anything, that would help. Just then, a man approached the group. He looked strong. Maybe he could help, if she could explain to him what was happening. The girl replied. Ana remembered the street vendor she had worked for. Maybe she could convince the vendor to let this man eat for free, as her payment for working for him. She crept around the group to him, careful not to draw attention to herself. "I know where you might score a free meal, if you can help me," she said. @Karger @Sorana @I think I am here.

Honestly, one of my biggest emotional reactions in the cosmere was when Kaladin reunited with his parents. I had to stop reading at that moment just to process all of my emotions. It was just such a touching moment because after so long thinking he was dead, their son was back. And Kal gets to see how much they love him, and that he's worthy of their love, and that they forgive him, and it's not his fault, and I know I'm rambling but I just love that moment so much.

Granted, but the blade is forever stuck to your hand (this does make it really easy to chop vegetables, though) I wish for the ability to ice-skate perfectly.

The streets were busy. Ana pushed down her frustration as she was shoved and jostled by the swarm of bodies. Her hands were still shaking, though not as badly. She still wasn't used to going out without an escort. T'Telir was beautiful, but it was also frighteningly dangerous. She had learned that the hard way. She headed towards the D'Denir statues. Last week, a street vendor had offered her work - a job trying to score him some more customers. She hadn't been very good at it - either stumbling awkwardly over her words or simply failing to catch anyone's attention, but the vendor had been kind, and given her some coin. As she neared the statues, the crowd thinned, and the shining statues, draped in all their gaudy finery stood watching over the city. Suddenly, to her left, people gasped, and Ana turned in time to see a spray of coins fly from a priest's pouch, catching the sunlight as they fell to the ground. A boy near him knelt down to help gather them, and another boy also ran over to help. Amid the confusion, a girl stood in the middle, looking distressed. Ana kept watching as the priest and one of the boys moved on. However, the other boy and the girl stayed. Ana frowned. She remembered another time, a few months ago, when a pickpocket had run away with her money. She watched the pair, memories churning inside of her. I should help. It's what Father would do. "Move it!" Ana was pushed over as a passing woman strode past her. Mud from the still-wet ground stained her skirt. She stood up, and fruitlessly tried to brush it off. She bit the inside of her cheek, and whispered to herself, "I am not scared", before approaching the pair. "Excuse me, are you two all right?" She asked.