Channelknight Fadran
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Status Replies posted by Channelknight Fadran
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I feel like I'm rapidly running out of reasons to exist and it's kind of scaring me. And yet sometimes I don't care and I just want this all to be over.
People say it'll get better a lot, but I'm seriously doubting that. At least, it won't get better anytime soon, and I need it to or I'm gonna break.
I've had a lot of support across the board, but people are starting to lose their patience with me and I can't blame them.
Panic attacks are continuing. I don't know. This doesn't feel worth it.
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Have… have you ever had a panic attack?
it is not advisable to have any mode of weaponry during those times; least of a blazing gun.
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I feel like I'm rapidly running out of reasons to exist and it's kind of scaring me. And yet sometimes I don't care and I just want this all to be over.
People say it'll get better a lot, but I'm seriously doubting that. At least, it won't get better anytime soon, and I need it to or I'm gonna break.
I've had a lot of support across the board, but people are starting to lose their patience with me and I can't blame them.
Panic attacks are continuing. I don't know. This doesn't feel worth it.
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Quote
when the light is running low
and the shadows start to grow
when the places that you know seem like fantasy
there's a light inside your soul
that's still shining through the cold
with the truth; the promise in our hearts
don't forget - I'm with you in the dark
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So, I was going to catch up on all my notifications, but...
Spoiler
heck that.
What did I miss?
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What
huh
what
what
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I could probably count on my hands
all of the things I did today
Instead of being one to understand
I'm the kind of guy who takes away
the world from other peoplebecause they think I need it more
It doesn't matter than I'm less than null
they think I have great things in store
But I don't
that should be obvious
I'm tired of growing up and fighting on
And I won'tmake any promises
just so I can keep on breaking them upon
the hearts of people I've betrayed-
nothing happened; I was just awake, conscious, and alone.
those three things, combined, are quite dangerous
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I could probably count on my hands
all of the things I did today
Instead of being one to understand
I'm the kind of guy who takes away
the world from other peoplebecause they think I need it more
It doesn't matter than I'm less than null
they think I have great things in store
But I don't
that should be obvious
I'm tired of growing up and fighting on
And I won'tmake any promises
just so I can keep on breaking them upon
the hearts of people I've betrayed-
so I'll go on up and tell them all: I'm through
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I could probably count on my hands
all of the things I did today
Instead of being one to understand
I'm the kind of guy who takes away
the world from other peoplebecause they think I need it more
It doesn't matter than I'm less than null
they think I have great things in store
But I don't
that should be obvious
I'm tired of growing up and fighting on
And I won'tmake any promises
just so I can keep on breaking them upon
the hearts of people I've betrayed-
And I'm scared of all the things
that people think I'm gonna do
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If I was good at piano, I would fuse Jiyuu no Tsubasa with Shinzou wo Sasageyo and create the Paradis National Anthem.
too bad I suck
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"Play by ear" implies that I can listen to a song and learn to play it; what I do is listen to a song, manually figure out the key, melody, main harmonies, etc; and then I can figure it out from there.
Kinda. In reality I often have to return to the song in question whenever I get stuck (Sheet Music Boss is my go-to reference channel; their MIDI tracks are really easy to follow), which often means I just learn to copy certain patterns. If you put on a song I never learned to play, I couldn't tell you anything about it other than whether it's Major or Minor (and even that's with a <1.0 confidence interval)
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If I was good at piano, I would fuse Jiyuu no Tsubasa with Shinzou wo Sasageyo and create the Paradis National Anthem.
too bad I suck
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If I was good at piano, I would fuse Jiyuu no Tsubasa with Shinzou wo Sasageyo and create the Paradis National Anthem.
too bad I suck
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can you read sheet music?
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why is your pfp a weird mix between Emma Watson and every dead wife in a drama movie
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don't wanna
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...okay, so are we gonna talk about how every anime's OP4 is the weakest?
Except Fullmetal Alchemist (Full m e t a l a LcHemiST), which is perfect and can do no wrong
but like:
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
- Side note: We all know Sasageyo is The Best and Guren no Yumiya is the most iconic, but like... why do people sleep on Jiyuu no Tsubasa that song goes SO hard
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Jujutsu Kaisen - SPECIALZ. I don't think it's controversial to say while the anime has been balling in the music department overall, its OPs have all slowly regressed from The Epic that was Kaikai Kitan. Vivid Vice had a kind of weird semi-emotional thing going on, and Ao no Sumika was pretty decent with its main guitar stuff; but SPECIALZ seemed way too Modern US Pop-y for my taste.
- Side note: LOST IN PARADISE IS THE BEST ENDING PIECE TO EVER EXIST IN ANYTHING
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JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - End of The World. Granted, I haven't even come close to finishing this series yet, and only just heard this OP for the first time; however, upon realizing that it was OP 4, I was like... wait. Why is it always OP 4? Why? But anyway, it was just kinda lame compared to the absolute bangers we've had coming into this.
- Side note: If you want to watch JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and know nothing about it - keep it that way. Watch the show blind. Know nothing. Learn everything organically. It is insane and I love it.
- Demon Slayer - Okay, so... there are a few ways you can look at this. There are technically four OPs so far, but not everyone watched the Mugen Train arc episodically, because they (like myself) went for the movie release instead. It has much less personal value to me, and thus I went in expecting to have to disclaim this one but... I dunno, maybe it's pretty good actually?? Still definitely a competition between Akeboshi and Kizuna no Kiseki for... okay, I'll be the first to admit this show's a little overrated, but the music is SO GOOD, so saying "worst" is like trying to pick a least favorite Hans Zimmer soundtrack; but as for which one ultimately falls shortest of Gurenge and ESPECIALLY Zankyou Sanka is kind of up to preference.
Animes that don't count:
- Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood - did you know that every goddamn song in this entire show is a slappin' masterpiece? And I mean all of them. Heck, FMAB's OP4 might be my favorite of the lineup.
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Hunter x Hunter - this one technically has (I think) six OPs, but they're literally all the exact same song with slightly different lyrics so WHO CARES
- Side note: the song in question is also a banger
- Dunno - Do let me know where else this assessment falls short.
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First is most Iconic for sure
I am now going to listen through the full versions of all five, so as to formulate a more educated opinion
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1
- Report
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
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...okay, so are we gonna talk about how every anime's OP4 is the weakest?
Except Fullmetal Alchemist (Full m e t a l a LcHemiST), which is perfect and can do no wrong
but like:
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
- Side note: We all know Sasageyo is The Best and Guren no Yumiya is the most iconic, but like... why do people sleep on Jiyuu no Tsubasa that song goes SO hard
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Jujutsu Kaisen - SPECIALZ. I don't think it's controversial to say while the anime has been balling in the music department overall, its OPs have all slowly regressed from The Epic that was Kaikai Kitan. Vivid Vice had a kind of weird semi-emotional thing going on, and Ao no Sumika was pretty decent with its main guitar stuff; but SPECIALZ seemed way too Modern US Pop-y for my taste.
- Side note: LOST IN PARADISE IS THE BEST ENDING PIECE TO EVER EXIST IN ANYTHING
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JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - End of The World. Granted, I haven't even come close to finishing this series yet, and only just heard this OP for the first time; however, upon realizing that it was OP 4, I was like... wait. Why is it always OP 4? Why? But anyway, it was just kinda lame compared to the absolute bangers we've had coming into this.
- Side note: If you want to watch JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and know nothing about it - keep it that way. Watch the show blind. Know nothing. Learn everything organically. It is insane and I love it.
- Demon Slayer - Okay, so... there are a few ways you can look at this. There are technically four OPs so far, but not everyone watched the Mugen Train arc episodically, because they (like myself) went for the movie release instead. It has much less personal value to me, and thus I went in expecting to have to disclaim this one but... I dunno, maybe it's pretty good actually?? Still definitely a competition between Akeboshi and Kizuna no Kiseki for... okay, I'll be the first to admit this show's a little overrated, but the music is SO GOOD, so saying "worst" is like trying to pick a least favorite Hans Zimmer soundtrack; but as for which one ultimately falls shortest of Gurenge and ESPECIALLY Zankyou Sanka is kind of up to preference.
Animes that don't count:
- Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood - did you know that every goddamn song in this entire show is a slappin' masterpiece? And I mean all of them. Heck, FMAB's OP4 might be my favorite of the lineup.
-
Hunter x Hunter - this one technically has (I think) six OPs, but they're literally all the exact same song with slightly different lyrics so WHO CARES
- Side note: the song in question is also a banger
- Dunno - Do let me know where else this assessment falls short.
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…was that sarcasm
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
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...okay, so are we gonna talk about how every anime's OP4 is the weakest?
Except Fullmetal Alchemist (Full m e t a l a LcHemiST), which is perfect and can do no wrong
but like:
-
Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
- Side note: We all know Sasageyo is The Best and Guren no Yumiya is the most iconic, but like... why do people sleep on Jiyuu no Tsubasa that song goes SO hard
-
Jujutsu Kaisen - SPECIALZ. I don't think it's controversial to say while the anime has been balling in the music department overall, its OPs have all slowly regressed from The Epic that was Kaikai Kitan. Vivid Vice had a kind of weird semi-emotional thing going on, and Ao no Sumika was pretty decent with its main guitar stuff; but SPECIALZ seemed way too Modern US Pop-y for my taste.
- Side note: LOST IN PARADISE IS THE BEST ENDING PIECE TO EVER EXIST IN ANYTHING
-
JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - End of The World. Granted, I haven't even come close to finishing this series yet, and only just heard this OP for the first time; however, upon realizing that it was OP 4, I was like... wait. Why is it always OP 4? Why? But anyway, it was just kinda lame compared to the absolute bangers we've had coming into this.
- Side note: If you want to watch JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and know nothing about it - keep it that way. Watch the show blind. Know nothing. Learn everything organically. It is insane and I love it.
- Demon Slayer - Okay, so... there are a few ways you can look at this. There are technically four OPs so far, but not everyone watched the Mugen Train arc episodically, because they (like myself) went for the movie release instead. It has much less personal value to me, and thus I went in expecting to have to disclaim this one but... I dunno, maybe it's pretty good actually?? Still definitely a competition between Akeboshi and Kizuna no Kiseki for... okay, I'll be the first to admit this show's a little overrated, but the music is SO GOOD, so saying "worst" is like trying to pick a least favorite Hans Zimmer soundtrack; but as for which one ultimately falls shortest of Gurenge and ESPECIALLY Zankyou Sanka is kind of up to preference.
Animes that don't count:
- Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood - did you know that every goddamn song in this entire show is a slappin' masterpiece? And I mean all of them. Heck, FMAB's OP4 might be my favorite of the lineup.
-
Hunter x Hunter - this one technically has (I think) six OPs, but they're literally all the exact same song with slightly different lyrics so WHO CARES
- Side note: the song in question is also a banger
- Dunno - Do let me know where else this assessment falls short.
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Opening Piece
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
-
...okay, so are we gonna talk about how every anime's OP4 is the weakest?
Except Fullmetal Alchemist (Full m e t a l a LcHemiST), which is perfect and can do no wrong
but like:
-
Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
- Side note: We all know Sasageyo is The Best and Guren no Yumiya is the most iconic, but like... why do people sleep on Jiyuu no Tsubasa that song goes SO hard
-
Jujutsu Kaisen - SPECIALZ. I don't think it's controversial to say while the anime has been balling in the music department overall, its OPs have all slowly regressed from The Epic that was Kaikai Kitan. Vivid Vice had a kind of weird semi-emotional thing going on, and Ao no Sumika was pretty decent with its main guitar stuff; but SPECIALZ seemed way too Modern US Pop-y for my taste.
- Side note: LOST IN PARADISE IS THE BEST ENDING PIECE TO EVER EXIST IN ANYTHING
-
JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - End of The World. Granted, I haven't even come close to finishing this series yet, and only just heard this OP for the first time; however, upon realizing that it was OP 4, I was like... wait. Why is it always OP 4? Why? But anyway, it was just kinda lame compared to the absolute bangers we've had coming into this.
- Side note: If you want to watch JoJo's Bizarre Adventure and know nothing about it - keep it that way. Watch the show blind. Know nothing. Learn everything organically. It is insane and I love it.
- Demon Slayer - Okay, so... there are a few ways you can look at this. There are technically four OPs so far, but not everyone watched the Mugen Train arc episodically, because they (like myself) went for the movie release instead. It has much less personal value to me, and thus I went in expecting to have to disclaim this one but... I dunno, maybe it's pretty good actually?? Still definitely a competition between Akeboshi and Kizuna no Kiseki for... okay, I'll be the first to admit this show's a little overrated, but the music is SO GOOD, so saying "worst" is like trying to pick a least favorite Hans Zimmer soundtrack; but as for which one ultimately falls shortest of Gurenge and ESPECIALLY Zankyou Sanka is kind of up to preference.
Animes that don't count:
- Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood - did you know that every goddamn song in this entire show is a slappin' masterpiece? And I mean all of them. Heck, FMAB's OP4 might be my favorite of the lineup.
-
Hunter x Hunter - this one technically has (I think) six OPs, but they're literally all the exact same song with slightly different lyrics so WHO CARES
- Side note: the song in question is also a banger
- Dunno - Do let me know where else this assessment falls short.
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okay lists are saying that Guren no Yumiya and Gurenge are the "Best Anime OPs of All Time" and that is some consumerism carabast; SHOW A CRUEL ANGEL'S THESIS SOME RESPECT, YOU HERETICS
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Attack on Titan - Red Swan. This one's pretty polarizing among the fandom but like... why? It's garbage compared to the absolute B A N G E R S that this show has put out. The only one that can be somewhat comparable-ish to this level of underwhelming-ness would be My War; I can see why some people like it, but Deathcore Black Metal just isn't my jam.
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"Don't worry Mr. Teacher Sir! I'll get all my missing schoolwork done over fall break! I'm totally responsible and organized!"
SpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerI have watched anime for 8 hours today
SpoilerSpoilerthat is not an exaggeration
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...what anime?
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I have no intention to create a political forum here. I have a few words to say and I'll leave it at that. I got married two days ago. To the woman that I love most in the world. A woman about whom I have written many a poem. I regret nothing, but the timing. As you may or may not have heard the worst war in the history of Israel. The carnage is unspeakable and sure to get worse. I almost felt wrong getting married amidst the death and slaughter. We were I suppose a light in the darkness that has fallen as a cloak so thick as to be blinding. Remember to be the light in the dark never feel guilty for being happy because you deserve it!!!
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It might be construed as cheesy to quote Tolkien in this situation - or, perhaps, simply in poor taste
but this is the man who survived the First World War; he wrote on my occasions about the horror of gas weapons and screaming shells. Perhaps, more than anyone, his words are truest:
"The world in indeed full of peril, and in it there are many dark places; but still there is much that is fair, and though in all lands love is now mingled with grief, it grows perhaps the greater."
Congratulations, pal. May you be a light in dark places, when all other lights go out.
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Nothing quite like receiving an email from Facebook notifying you of the one (1) Notification you have received since...
[a confused scouring later]
...2017, apparently
apparently I made a Facebook account in 2017
I was - notably - born in 1961, making me older than my dad. And my last name is Smith, it would seem.
(The notification in question had something to do with local dads and barbecues in my area of something... I only glanced at it, but the way it was worded definitely made it seem like I had once consciously followed some selection of activity hashtags, and the algorithm had finally found - after over six years - a single post or group or something that actually fit it).
(I mean... it's not that I don't like outdoorsy stuff. Get me some homies and I could hike the heck outta those mountains; but how did they get "looking for local dads and dudebros from Dick's Sporting Goods and REI to go kayaking with" from "presumably hasn't been on the internet for six yea-
...oh
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"Here's what you've missed"
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Now counting 3 days since a day when I haven't had to force down a panic attack. There haven't even been good reasons. My life is just killing me right now, and there's nothing I can do about it. I've been trying to do stuff I enjoy to distract myself, but that's a temporary solution that makes things worse in the long run.
I feel like I'm breaking, which is ridiculous because everyone around me is being understanding and lenient. Here's a lyric from a song that I think conveys some of how I'm feeling pretty nicely.
QuoteWell, well,
Look who's inside again.
Went out to look for
A reason to hide again.
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Have you found a pattern of things that cause your panic attacks?
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Someone tell me an RP to join.
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no it's okay lol I need to spend more time writing my book and less time writing Star Wars fanfiction
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Someone tell me an RP to join.
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Hyrule Adventurers is up-and-coming; currently, not much has happened. The setting is post(?)-TotK, but we might pull some timeline multiverse shenanigans later on
I'm also particularly fond of Jedi Insurgence... though I might be the only one, heh
(I don't say this because other people aren't showing interest; I'm saying this because I'm kinda constantly writing super duper megaposts and pinging everybody to respond)
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What I have learned about today is not the worst thing to ever happen
Spoiler(The worst things to Probably Ever Happen:)
- Genocide (Most notably the Holocaust, the Armenian Genocide, the Rwandan Genocide, Holodomor... an argument could be made for The Great Leap Forward)
- Slavery (It has existed since the dawn of time and shows no signs of vanishing - it is arguable as to whether historic or modern slavery is "worse," but also not arguable because why the hell would you try to argue that)
- War (Pretty much all of it, but my mind always turns to WWI as the most miserable time period in all of history. Death by chlorine gas, flamethrower; drowning from a U-boat attack, stabbed with a bayonet, bleeding out from amputation; waiting in the trenches for days and weeks on end for the cold to finally finish you off)
But I will say this: it is definitely up there.
To all my queer friends, you probably know all about Conversion "Therapy." To all my other friends who are otherwise out of the loop, you might have conceived the idea on your own time as Something that Probably Happens. It is the "practice" of "fixing" a person's sexual orientation, gender preference, or pretty much anything else that isn't just Straight. I've always assumed that were some bad-apple religious zealots and who actually did it, but I kind of figured that it was a rare occurrence.
No.
First of all: disclaimer. The best numbers I could find were for a research paper taken in Ohio. The article citing it discloses several times that their "national" statistics are extrapolated from these, and that no conclusive Everywhere Study has crunched the numbers on the whole thing.
Second of all: trigger warning? Maybe I should've put this earlier, but if you're uncomfortable with the idea of suicide, self-harm, identity assassination, and other forms of enforced self-hatred; be warned.
Because exposure to "Conversion "Therapy"" doubles the suicide rate for queer teens; in the best of cases.
I am not queer, to my knowledge. I am a very straight, cishet, white, default American male; and as a professional Autistic guy, I've always had trouble with empathy. Sympathy I can manage just fine, but to actually put myself in someone else's shoes and try to feel what they're feeling is really hard; so when I first learned about this horrendous practice, and felt genuine rage and terror at just the mere idea... I couldn't begin to imagine what it would actually be like for a real person.
The "process" varies from practitioner to practitioner, because it is not a science in any respect - dozens (if not hundreds) of studies have completely berated the practice, citing it as anything and everything from baseless to actively harmful to literally deadly. The practice is banned in 20 states, plus D.C. and Puerto Rico; but even then, the law cannot extend past medical 'professionals.' 4/5 "therapists" for the process are religious leaders.
Like... let me make it clear just how unprofessional that is. A large number of modern-day religions are structurally opposed to queer individuals (I'll be referring to Christian denominations because I'm not particularly qualified to discuss anything else), but many have several individuals who either don't actively depose their identities. The literal Pope has made several remarks that - while still rather homophobic in nature - don't claim that homosexuality or transgenderism is a sin against God. Even if his words are to say "I'm sure God can help you gay folks," there's still a heavy theme of "we must accept everyone, regardless of who they are, so long as they are good."
So... homophobia is homophobia. But d'you want to know what's worse than homophobia?
CONVERSION THERAPY
THIS IS THE WORST THING THAT IS LITERALLY LEGAL ACROSS MORE THAN HALF THE UNITED STATES
Here's some numbers: roughly 2% of all LGBTQ+ minors will be exposed to Conversion Therapy. There are roughly 2 million LGBTQ+ minors in the USA. Badabing badaboom: 40,000 minors exposed to Conversion Therapy every year.
LGBTQ+ minors are four times as likely to attempt suicide than their peers; Queer individuals exposed to Conversion Therapy are twice as likely on top of that, making their chances eight times more likely than the "average" person.
How many Queer kids to undergo this process will attempt suicide a year? Thirteen thousand. How many will succeed? Three thousand.
Conversion Therapy has a 13% mortality rate.
You are more likely to survive a Cancer Diagnosis
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It posted prematurely, but there wasn't much more I needed to say
I learned about this from an anonymous internet post: a firsthand account of a CT survivor. The "practitioner" they were assigned to had a 50% suicide rate among their "patients," because the process was literally to deconstruct the victim and cause them to hate themselves more than anything - it is a sin, this is wrong, you are evil.
There was no process of healing the individual after they finally convinced themselves that they were 'cured.' There was no semblance of detransition support or actual councelling or... anything. The account said that 27 of the 50 individuals subjected to this horrible process killed themselves within one month.
This was seen as a good thing - at least they wouldn't be gay anymore.
I cannot think of a worse form of torture than this. No amount of waterboarding, branding, whipping, electrocution, poison, starvation... it couldn't compare to a process so psychologically horrifying that it could convince so many of its victims to harm themselves because of how absolutely miserable their lives had become.
The poor souls subjected to this are told to detest their body, mind, soul; their very existence... and told that it is from a place of love and righteousness. People all across the US have convinced themselves that this is a righteous practice, condoned by God - that they aren't murderers, they aren't abusers, and they aren't the cruelest and most detestable monsters on the face of the planet.
I've never even come close to imagining what it would be like, and that terrifies me. On behalf of my allies from all walks of life: this is Wrong. There is no excuse for it.
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My childhood crushes but they get progressively more unhinged:
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
Spoiler
.jpeg.a716489c46715f9b75caa7b23002a365.jpeg)
Spoiler.jpeg.1f41f5597b7803dcb074617468acbbb8.jpeg)
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I...
...I don't know what I was expecting, really
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I'm not having a good time
want to know what
would make my time
a bit better?
SpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerREPLY TO JEDI INSURGENCE YOU BANTHA FODDER
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Chill, homie - 'twas only joshing you
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Youtube: [Recommends a video chronicling all the lightsaber duels in Star Wars]
Me: I guess it's time for a TIER LIST
Spoiler(I didn't actually do that I'd need a lot of screenshots)
First of all:
Garbage:
- Luke vs. Leia (Rise of Skywalker): Apparently this one counts? I gave it a 1/10, and frankly I think it deserves less. It's approximately three seconds long and absolutely nothing happens.
- Obi-Wan Kenobi vs Asajj Ventress (Star The Clone Wars Wars): 2/10. It's awkward and jumpy and Kenobi is kind of annoying throughout the whole thing.
- High Inquisitor vs Kenan Jarrus, Rematch 2 (Rebels): 2/10. There were an awful lot of these semi-fights, and this one was the worst.
- Kylo Ren vs Rey (Rise of Skywalker): 2/10. Their first fight in this god-awful movie. I really needed Rey to stop grunting all the time - this will become something of a theme
- Master Yoda vs The Senate (Revenge of the Sith): 3/10. On the notepad I gave this 0 for the Sin of Interrupting Duel of the Fates, but honestly it deserves better than all the above pieces of garbage.
- Anakin vs Dooku, feat. Sand (Star The Clone Wars Wars): 3/10. Out of the two god-awful lightsaber duels this god-awful movie had, this one was almost acceptable. Gets points for tactical usage of sand.
- Anakin & Kenobi vs Ventress (The Clone Wars): 3/10. She grunts too much.
- Ben vs Rey (The Rise of Skywalker): 3/10. This fight is garbage. Too much grunting.
Watchable:
- General Kenobi vs General Grievous (Revenge of the Sith): 3/10 - one point for about every second of actual lightsaber vs lightsaber combat there is in this "fight"
- Darth Maul vs Qui-Gon Jinn (The Phantom Menace): 4/10. Remember when they fought for about three seconds on Tatooine? It was okay.
- Darth Maul vs Pre Visla (The Clone Wars): 4/10. It's a decent action scene, but hardly any of it is actual Lightsaber Duel
- Anakin vs Barriss Offee (The Clone Wars): 4/10. The fight itself is a little uneventful, but does come with a great meme
Spoiler
and yes - this is the best-quality image I could find.
- The Senate vs Master Windu (Revenge of the Sith): 4/10. First few seconds of Palpatine just killing off random schmucks is a little weird, but his duel with just Windu is pretty solid. Obv I don't like the grunting but it's kind of part of the effect with Sheev.
- Ben vs Vader (Kenobi): 4/10. Yeah it's okay.
- Grand Inquisitor vs Kenan Jarrus, Rematch 1 (Rebels): 4/10. Tries to be like Dooku vs Anyone, but ultimately comes up short.
- Ezra & Kenan vs. Inquisitor Bros (Rebels): 4/10. The action is okay, but it suffers from Conversationitis
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Ezra, Kenan, & Ahsoka vs Inquisitor Bros (Rebels): 4/10. Again, the action is okay... but this time there are just way too many lightsaber blades to make sense of any of it.
- And then Maul shows up: 3/10. The action actually becomes worse now.
- Blind Kenan vs Maul (Rebels): 4/10. It's okay, but also about three seconds long.
- Sabine vs. Mandalore guy (Rebels): 4/10. It was kinda boring.
- Rey vs Kylo Ren (The Force Awakens): 4/10. I would rank it way lower if the CGI wasn't as good.
Decent:
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Darth Sideous vs. Maul & Savage (The Clone Wars): 5/10. Would've been better if there'd been more Lightsaber and less Force Pushing
- Maul vs. Darth Sideous: 11/10. After Savage is killed, this fight becomes wildly incredible.
- Count Dooku vs. Anakin & Kenobi (Revenge of the Sith): 5/10. It's actually kinda lucky it got this high - the whole thing is carried by the last few seconds of Anakin vs Dooku. Otherwise it's just some weird Force shenanigans.
- Darth Vader vs. Third Sister (Kenobi): 5/10. Respect any fight that lets Vader give absolutely no craps about his opponent.
- Inquisitor vs Kenan Jarrus, Rematch 3 (Rebels): 5/10. And another one gone... this one's okay. Ezra shows up later on and the fight tries to be Maul vs Kenobi & Qui-Gon, which... no.
- Finn vs. Kylo Ren (the Force Awakens): 5/10. Remember earlier when I said Rey's first duel with Kylo was bad? In fact, it was so bad that Finn's loss was actually better than her win.
- Kenobi vs Vader (A New Hope): 5/10. It's the first ever lightsaber duel and it honestly goes pretty hard.
Pretty Good:
- Kenobi vs Dooku (Attack of the Clones): 6/10. 'S okay.
- Padawanakin vs Dooku (Attack of the Clones): 6/10. 'S okay
- Kit Fisto vs General Grievous (The Clone Wars): 6/10. Was better than I expected and remembered.
- Ventress & Savage vs. Count Dooku (The Clone Wars): 6/10 here we have the first Prime Example of Clone Wars Dooku kicking name and taking bubblegum.
- Ventress vs Ahsoka (The Clone Wars): 6/10. This is the one a little way's in when Ahsoka's been framed or whatever... maybe I should've dropped it lower. There wasn't much Lightsaber going on the whole time.
- Inquisitor vs Kenan Jarrus (Rebels): 6/10. Yeah, that's right - there were four of these. And the first one was the best.
- Ahsoka vs Maul (Rebels): 6/10. For all five seconds we have, it is glorious.
Really Good:
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Darth Maul vs. Qui-Gon Jinn & Obi-Wan Kenobi (The Phantom Menace): 7/10. A legendary duel, if a tad slow in the middle.
- Maul vs. Kenobi: 11/10. Those last thirty seconds are incredible.
- Dooku vs. The Ghost Witch Ladies (The Clone Wars): 7/10. Did I mention how epic Clone Wars Dooku was? He's the only one who could take completely unnatural-looking movements and a pair of pajamas and make it look metal as hell.
- Kenobi vs. Darth Vader (Kenobi): 7/10. I liked it. Dropped off near the end.
- Vader vs. Ahsoka (Rebels): 7/10. Darth Vader's movements seem a little weird, but otherwise it's a great fight.
- Obi-Wan vs. Padawanakin (Kenobi): 8/10. Say what you will about this show, but it had some pretty solid lightsaber duels.
- Yoda vs. Count Dooku (Attack of the Clones): 8/10. Yeah, yeah... the screaming is weird. But otherwise it's definitely the best fight in the movie.
- Count Dooku vs. Yodette (Tales of the Jedi): 9/10. Started weird; got better.
Really Good:
- Count Dooku vs. Anakin & Obi-Wan, Drugs Edition (The Clone Wars): 9/10. Peak Dooku! Peak Dooku. I will take no criticisms at this time.
- Luke Skywalker vs. Darth Vader (The Empire Strikes Back): 9/10. Did you know that this movie is actually really good???
The Best Ones:
- Luke Skywalker vs. Anakin Skywalker (Return of the Jedi): 10/10. Did you know that this movie is actually really damn good???
- Maul vs. Ben Kenobi (Rebels): 11/10. They finished Maul's story with a duel against Kenobi... it lasts three seconds.
Tied for First Place:
- Anakin Skywalker vs. Obi-Wan Kenobi (Revenge of the Sith): 12/10
- Ahsoka Tano vs. Maul (The Clone Wars): 12/10
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the important thing here is "Trying to be cool" versus "being cool."
Anakin vs. Obi-Wan? Cool. The movement is fluid, the strikes have weight, the choreography has tension.
Pretty much all of the ST fights? Trying to be cool; or occasionally not even. They have wildly exaggerated slashes and jabs, punctuated with pointless grunting to make it seem like they're going all out - but it looks more like a group of kids fighting with sticks than Force-wielders fighting with lightsabers.
There were incredibly unnatural attacks and moves in the older movies, but they flowed together well and just looked cool; you could accept "yeah, this isn't a sword fight, it's a lightsaber fight."
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I'm not having a good time
want to know what
would make my time
a bit better?
SpoilerSpoilerSpoilerSpoilerREPLY TO JEDI INSURGENCE YOU BANTHA FODDER
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that would also be nice
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