Handerfle cut in with A Very Potter Musical.
“Underneath these stairsI hear the sneers and feel glares ofMy cousin, my uncle and my auntCan't believe how cruel they areAnd it stings my lighting scarTo know that they'll never ever give me what I wantI know I don't deserve theseAwful rules made by the DursleysHere on Privet DriveCan't take these stupid MugglesBut despite all of my strugglesI'm still aliveI'm sick of summer and this waiting aroundMan, it's September, so I'm skipping this townHey, it's no mystery, there's nothing here for me nowGotta get back to HogwartsI gotta get back to schoolI gotta get back to HogwartsWhere everybody thinks I'm coolBack to witches and wizards, and magical beastsTo goblins and ghosts and to magical feastsIt's all that I love, and it's all that I needAt Hogwarts, Hogwarts”
Somebody better get this.