The Allomantic Metalhead

Thanks! My family says that all the time, although I find that I'm much better at worldbuilding than creating a plot... Anyways, I think the only thing in the way of me becoming a published author (other than writer's block and my age, of course) is my short attention span. I hope my attention span is one of those things that gets better with age.

Granted. Your bane is that everyone now mocks everything you say. I wish I had an awesome magical eyepatch (I currently have both of my eyes, but eyepathces are awesome).

I never said I dodn't like vampires, just that I didn't like vampire fetishism, but that doesn't matter. The nightwatcher grants your wish. ...right after you win a $10,000 apple gift card. I wish that global warming was negated.

I choose death. Humanity deserves a book of grandeur made by three of the greatest authors in human history, even if I may never read it. Your bane is that, when you die, your afterlife is just a barroom that's empty (and devoid of booze) except for me, and I know that you are the reason I was never allowed to read a work of such grandeur. Better prepare some halfway decent apologies or spend the rest of eternity getting clubbed over the head with a bar stool. I wish that vampire fetishists would storm off. There's nothing sexy about a freezing cold walking corpse that rips your neck open and gorges on your blood, and it's technically necrophilia, even if they consent. And that's not even getting into the fact that they sleep in a storming coffin and can't enjoy a sunrise with you or go on a lunch date or anything like that....

Okay, you will never lose your wallet again because, while visiting a girl you met on an online dating site in Iowa, some jerk falls from the Mesosphere and crushes you. I wish that J.R.R. Tolkien and H.P. Lovecraft were temporarily resurrected to write a epic 13-book (each being about as long as Oathbringer) series with Brandon Sanderson and all of the books were extremely awesome (please make the curse effect me personally instead of the series please please please).

So there I was, about to face off against an evil librarian dark oculator, when suddenly I was on top of a massive skyscraper and some crazy blonde girl was pointing a handgun at me.

Okay, the Nightwatcher grants you your boon. Your bane is that you constantly have Beseech's cover of Danzig's "Devil's Plaything" stuck in your head. The Nightwatcher decided to be kind with her banes this time. I wish i was a mistborn with one randomly-generated ferring ability (choose one).

Thanks!

Okay, you now always have the exact same body temperature of Alec Guinness. I wish I was able to play and sing every single song I like and could summon an electric guitar out of thin air whenever I wanted to.

@hoiditthroughthegrapevine I'm sorry, that wouldn't work, but thanks for the advice, it's actually pretty good. The reason it wouldn't work is that the colors don't have as much to do with it as the creation/destruction duality and balance and stuff. The colors are just the way the essences manifest in the physical world.

Okay, your brain is transplanted into a robot's body. Your bane is that your body is constantly rusting and you have to polish it for two hours every day or become unable to move. I want the nightwatcher to please make me a mistborn werewolf grey essencewielder (see the bottom of the page. Yes, I did just link you to one of my creations on creation daily).

Yes, but you are no longer allowed to smoke. I wish I was a werewolf.

Granted, now everyone thinks you're really, really, really gay... and not the good kind of gay. The really, really, really campy kind of gay. Also, your bane is that you are now compelled to randomly bite people and recoil from holy symbols. Still not a vampire, but you think you are. I wish I could change my hair and eye color at will.

Okay, but you bane is that you're one of the albinos selected by my wish/curse, and you're also in the middle of the sahara desert when that happens and don't even get the pleasure of ripping me limb from limb. I wish I was the avatar of the gibbering madness of the Cthulhu Mythos, who wields immense power and causes madness and destruction wherever he goes.

The nightwatcher laughs at you. "It doesn't work that way, you storming slontze!" she tells you, then makes you an ancient and decrepit avatar who cannot understand order. I wish that albinism was ten times as common as it currently is.

Okay, you gain the powers of Nyalhotep, however, you're now basically Nyarlhotep, so you go insane and enjoy spreading chaos, madness, and pain. Congratulations, you're now worse than an epic. I wish I was an avatar of the elder gods and overlord of chaos.

Okay, I'll change it: Okay, you become a fullborn fullbinder, but you're also an epic that is extremely susceptible to the corruption despite having relatively useless powers. You're also violently allergic to everything, can't hold in stormlight for more than a second, have almost no strength (if we were using RPG terms, you'd have a strength score of 1), and can only see in the ultraviolet spectrum, but your powers, despite doing nothing to prevent you from having any of these burdens, do prevent you from dying by conventional means, so you're basically perpetually useless, evil, sick, almost incapable of movement, and unable to see normally, but you can't just be put out of your misery. I wish I had an epic powerset without the corruption.

Yeah, so?

You can, but you die. I wish I had an epic powerset without the corruption.

Okay, but you're constantly being purged of all investitures because you're not in the Cosmere. Oh, and Obliteration now inexplicably hates you and will do anything to destroy you and you family... slowly. I wish I was a tineye (tin misting)/watchman (bronze ferring) with an infinite supply of allomantic tin and bronzeminds.

Cool! His non-Cosmere works are cool, too. White Sand is kinda weird, but I think it's cool.

Hi! Welcome to the 17th shard! Which Sanderson books have you read? I've read pretty much all of them, plus a few short stories.

9.5/10. That's awesome!

Hurt Obliteration, Heal Dalinar 7. Obliteration - 9 8. Sourcefield - 5 9. Conflux - 6 11. Firefight (Fire epic version) - 6 12. Firefight (Megan) - 9 13. David - 10 14. Mizzy - 10 16. Elend - 9 17. God King - 9 18. Gavilar Kholin - 10 19. Dalinar - 13 21. Elhokar - 7 22. Sebarial - 5 23. Raoden - 6 24. Eventeo - 4

He's a chromium compounder! But seriously, folks, read the comments of the guys above me.