TwiLyghtSansSparkles

Hidden for pettiness. An even more petty problem:

A destiny-switching Epic. That would lend itself to quite the discussion on fate vs. free will, the nature of the future, and deep pondering on the nature of existence itself. Oh, who am I kidding? We'd just use it to set up as many ridiculous, out-of-character scenarios as we could.

WHY CAN I NOT UPVOTE THIS TWICE WHAT IS THIS INJUSTICE And why can't Lightwards taking Funtimes' destiny be canon??????

That waffle looks delicious. Hmm….time for another edit, it seems. *mutters about stupid Lucentia and her stupid murderous powers and her stupid stupidness*

Edits made. Funtimes took them all into the kitchen, gave them each a chainsaw, and told them to go to town. While, I might add, keeping Nathan's cover intact. I think she deserves a cookie.

Ah. I wasn't sure how quickly they were growing, and with the part she transformed, I figured that it had been separated from the rest of the walls and was thus no longer connected to her. I will edit accordingly.

I chose Option C.

Crimson spears shot from Lucentia's body, forming walls that trapped Nathan with Samantha. He couldn't see beyond that; aside from being an alarming shade of red and growing with remarkable speed, the walls were opaque. Nathan had one thought: I can't teleport. “Now, from what I have seen your girlfriend can´t transform my diamonds, is there anything you can do that doesn´t involve running away or begging for my mercy?” Somehow, Funtimes' muffled laugh cut through the diamond. "Tra-vel-er! Don't go anywhere! I've got a surprise for you!" Her laugh became the roar of a chainsaw, which sliced through the floor with a grinding roar and a shower of sawdust. "Diamonds aren't for-e-ver," she sang, vanishing into the crawlspace, "not when you're a mean-ie-face!" Nathan heard her pounding against the floor, felt the slight jolts through his shoes, and leaped backward, dragging Sam with him to dodge the chainsaw blade that rose through the floor. Funtimes giggled and stretched out her hand. Nathan had to kneel to take it, but kneel he did, yanking Sam down with him. Telling him to go after "The others, quick!" she visited the hippie and the Unicyclist. With them in hand, she gave her next order: "Kitchen, please!" Turning a wheelchair into a hungry wheelchair was a wonderful threat. Turning an Epic's dress into peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches was a fantastic one. Unfortunately, it didn't seem to resonate with Lucentia the way it should have. Hollow pings sounded from her side of the door, followed by excited cries and the sound of something pushing along the floor, tearing gashes in the wood as it advanced. Red light shone from the crack beneath the kitchen door. “Now," Lucentia said, her voice low and cool, "from what I have seen your girlfriend can´t transform my diamonds, is there anything you can do that doesn´t involve running away or begging for my mercy?” Funtimes answered that question with a laugh and the roar of a chainsaw. Judging by the grinding wail it produced, it cut through Lucentia's diamonds just fine. She sang, she laughed, and from the sounds of things, she grabbed the others before instructing Traveler to take her to the kitchen. A small frown creased her face at the sight of his injuries, but she shook it off, waving a hand at one of the cupboards. Five chainsaws appeared. "What's going on out there?" Funtimes dashed forward, grabbed a chainsaw, and thrust it into Remington's hands. "Lucentia—growing diamonds—take that and have fun!" Each of the others received a chainsaw and similar instructions, delivered with a giggle and a mad gleam in her eye. With the loudest, wildest laugh of all, Doctor Funtimes started her chainsaw and cut into the floor. Remington didn't have to be told twice. He pulled the cord on his chainsaw, which came to life with a satisfying roar. Calamity, he thought with a chuckle, I just might wind up liking that woman.

I'd say they're both stronger than they look. Nighthound probably wouldn't have much of a problem with either, but someone of average human strength would need some help to get out.

Right, him. I need to stop forgetting about him, but it can be hard to remember someone who never speaks. I think he's a few feet away from the table, on the opposite side of the room from the kitchen door.

Nathan and Samantha are somewhat close to the kitchen. Funtimes is directly across from Lucentia, and I think Revolution is closest. Remington is in the kitchen. Edit: This fight won't veer into this territory, will it?

I have the answer.

Aw, she's adorable! What's her power?

For a moment, Lucentia seemed ready to launch into a tirade that would invariably end with one person in the room either encased in or impaled by her diamonds. Then she drew herself up again, folded her hands in her lap, and allowed her expression to settle into one of false diplomacy. ”Alright, I might have overreacted to your Doctor over there dancing around an old wound of mine and the other girl implying that I sleep with my brother. Honestly, if you feel the need to defend incest, laughing at people in a wheelchair and being rude in general, that´s your life choice.” Lucentia would fit right in with the Epics in Newcago. Her ability to twist a situation, allowing herself to simultaneously play victim and victor was infuriating. There were few Epics Nathan could not stand. Most, like Fortuity, simply frightened him. Others, like Snakehands, made him retreat to the kitchen to mock them in secret. A few, like the Snow Queen, left him in awe. But it was Epics like Lucentia, who stared with haughty eyes and proclaimed their lot worse than that of those who could be dragged off and tortured for the amusement of their peers, that set his pulse racing with anger. He felt his cheeks flush, knew it for a sign of weakness, and did what he could have never done in Newcago: gave Lucentia his iciest smile, and seriously contemplated pouring hot coffee into her lap. Whether Funtimes saw his growing rage or not, he didn't know. All he knew was that Lucentia's comments made her laugh. "You're not in a wheelchair, silly!" With a wave of her hand, the statement became a lie. "Well, now you are." She stood on tiptoe and pranced forward like the strangest ballerina he'd ever seen. As she giggled, Lucentia's dress turned from diamond-mottled white to diamond-mottled…. Was that bread? Funtimes clasped her hands behind her back and leaned forward, placing her eyes level with Lucentia's, although she stood across the room. "If you stop being a meanieface, I'll undo that seat belt and put your dress back the way it was. If not…." She giggled. "That wheelchair really likes peanut butter and jelly. That's his favorite snack." As if to emphasize her point, a soft growl emanated from the wheelchair.

They're meaniefaces, and Funtimes does not like meaniefaces. Cool. I'll get that written up. That's a good idea! And Candyflame….just the name sounds promising.

Touche. It would allow Funtimes to try and show Lucentia that even if she's invincible, it's still her house and she must abide by her rules. One of those rules is, "Don't be a meanieface or you'll wear whatever I think you'd look best in. Even if it happens to be food." So she'd be able to transform the part of her dress that isn't diamond? I wasn't entirely sure that would work….

I…. I don't have an answer to that question.

Aaannnnnd Lucentia has Nighthound's gift for shutting down a conversation. I'm trying very hard to think of a post that doesn't involve Doctor Funtimes turning her dress into one made out of peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches strung together by diamonds.

His methods are very effective, even if they would get him in trouble with the PTA. And the police. And the FBI. You know, it's probably best for everyone that none of those organizations exist in this universe.....

That's a long time with the scorpions. Not that I'm complaining, mind you.... Indeed. On an unrelated note, there is a YouTube series called "Epic Rap Battles of History." It kind of makes me wonder what sort if rhymes our Epics would use in such a battle....

She reminds me of some very unpleasant little girls from my school years. Can we send her to an anti-bullying seminar led by Altermind? Aha! I hadn't before, but I do now. Very nice.

For Lucentia, start by typing every synonym for "unpleasant" you know into the search bar. That should suffice.

I thought it was either right from the start or during the early years. I'd set this RP around eight years after Steelheart took power, though, thinking that, for Oregon to be completely devastated but not widespread public knowledge, it would have to have happened within the last two to three years of the events in Steelheart. I figured Megan would have known about it, but not necessarily been there when it happened.

Wasn't Firefight with Steelheart from the beginning, though? Or did she join later on? I don't have the book near me, so I'm honestly not sure...

Oh, good. I was worried I'd made Remington's backstory a little too hardcore. Looks like I'm right on track! And then we take all of our terrifying characters to the Halloween RP, and no one sleeps again. (That's the idea. Though not your soul, exactly…. )