TwiLyghtSansSparkles

Yes. He was one of those Epics who got his powers, tested them, mastered them, and decided he was a god in a very short span of time. He was from a fairly small and isolated farming community near the Washington/Oregon border and, after testing his powers on them, he quietly killed every non-Epic there and moved on to the nearest small city, The Dalles. Snape had some pretty deep flaws, but he is too awesome to be compared to Reader. Although I do enjoy picturing him as Alan Rickman. "Sit down and have a chat….you twit." He went out soon, and that's what matters. Nighthound as a Death Eater—in either Potterverse or Oregonverse? Maybe a cross between Dumbledore and Luna Lovegood?

That, and he didn't last long. I'm thinking he appeared in late November, terrorized The Dalles all through December, and was finally brought down in early January. It was a pretty damaging war for The Dalles, but didn't spread too far beyond that. Yes. Which would make Reader….Bellatrix Lestrange?

The soldier who asked Backtrack how he knew Koschei hit the farmhouse risked his life to ask that question.

Isn't it obvious? He has clearly built up a Voldemort-like reputation and has become The-Epic-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Or-Even-Mentioned-In-Casual-Conversation.

Yeah, that sounds about right. No kidding. And little Northwestern me is sitting behind someone, going 35 in a 50 zone, saying, "Come ON! It's water from the sky! It's not going to eat you!" Agreed. Also, I think I'm beginning to see exactly how terrifying The Dalles is from Backtrack's perspective. To him, it must look like Koschei seized control of the local police and military and holds the city in such an iron grip that he hasn't had to visit Reader in his office for two years. Wonder how he'll react to Autumn's standard greeting ("Autumn Glass, not an Epic")?

Um….Arizonans, who drive like idiots when there's even a hint of rain? Yes indeed. Yes. If the last two Question threads could be combined and locked, that would be awesome. Keep the forum from becoming too cluttered with all of our ponies and jokes.

*looks at 40+ pages of material filling two threads, plus ponies and jokes, and Halloween special* Too much.

New Question thread, everyone! We'll see how long this one lasts.

All right, I'm going to start a new Question thread and change the WHIO thread title to What Happened in Portland, to make things less confusing. (I've been considering it for a while now.)

Hold on—in this alternate universe we're creating for the heck of it, is Nighthound a kindly gentleman whose pack of "hounds" is made up entirely of dogs he adopted from a shelter?

Sam is a sunny Pollyanna type, while Revolution makes a point of stuffing her face with chemical-laden snack cakes and beef jerky at every opportunity. I will return to giggle over Doctor Frowntimes quite often, I assure you. (Awwwwwwww! This needs to happen. )

So does Alternate!Cricket call Alternate!Aldo the "most amazing boyfriend in the history of amazing amazingness?" (Just as long as she never makes mistletoe grow when Nighthound is near, she's welcome anytime. )

Wait. If we're still in the same alternate universe where Lightwards is arrested for PDA and Remington is a coward, that would make Backtrack not only a High Epic who dethroned Steelheart, but a High Epic who is good with the ladies. Would that make Jingleberry his terrifying consort? Also, would that make Nathan a sadistic High Epic who gave Fortuity a run for his money? And Saccharine a dour, old-fashioned librarian? (That is an awesome Jingleberry pony, by the way. )

NOOOOOOOOO PLEASE JINGLEBERRY I'LL DO ANYTHING ANYTHING ALL HAIL EMPRESS JINGLEBERRY Wait. This was her plan all along!

My money's on Jingleberry.

Remember who else started out as a joke Epic? Given how terrifying Quota became, I think it's safe to say that we're good at making joke Epics pretty scary. Mwahahahahahahaha! Is that the same parallel universe where Lightwards is arrested for too many public displays of affection in Calamityville? Because I kind of want to visit that one.

I can already tell I'm going to like this guy.

"Chow down on random insanity!"

The Hangover: Epics Edition. I was thinking 100 or thereabouts, just to make things easier on the poor mods.

Spurring Drunk!Remington to wonder if he can fashion a shiv out of branches and prehistoric insects.

Nathan is overage. And if he happens to get hammered, he will have some harsh words about Lightwards' hat.

Drunk!Nathan wouldn't be too impaired, as he has dealt with several Epics who thought it funny to demonstrate their judgement-impairment powers on the servers, and so knows how to handle being a little tipsy. If you want to see any sort of fun from him, have Intervention get him hammered. Drunk!Funtimes and Drunk!Remington should be fun, though.

It's his birthday? Happy birthday, Mailliw! I like him and can't wait to see him attack the MoNA.

Which means the song is sung by Aldo, the only character who can shrink a car to pocket size. I love them both. All we need now is a Unicyclist pony for Max to annoy.

Pancakes are Funtimes' territory. Although that raises the question of why the cars are falling in the first place....