Kobold King

Quickslide growled as he limped his way towards the gift shop. Miraculously, that sparking elephant hadn't seemed to do any permanent damage when it threw him across the room. His back ached rather a lot, and one of his legs made him wince whenever he took a step. At least it wasn't broken. And whatever injuries he sported himself, they were nothing compared to what he'd do to these intruders. The rainbow lady and her boyfriend were standing just within the gift shop. The woman raised her hand, and most of the glass walls shifted into solid stone boundaries. The man picked up a heavy staff and raised it like a club, as if he were planning on fighting him with it. Quickslide sneered as he let his feet slide to a stop next to one of Hotwire's totaled cars. It would supply cover--not that he was likely to need it, facing these morons. He raised his Magnum from behind the vehicle and kept its sights firmly facing the ridiculous woman's center mass. He squeezed the trigger... A deafening roar filled his ears and his shot went wild. He spun on a dime to pinpoint the problem. It did not take long; the elephant from before was on its feet again, thundering towards him. With a quiet curse he increased the friction across the museum floor, causing the animal to stumble in its charge. Stumble, but not trip entirely. It carried on with a wildly determined gait, spraypainted target sign flashing as it turned to ram Quickslide. The Epic tried firing several shots into the animal's face, but they might as well have been peanuts for all the stopping power they had. With a cry of alarm, Quickslide lowered the friction beneath his feet, sliding backwards as quickly as he could as the elephant tossed Hotwire's wreckage aside. He frantically dodged several swings from an enraged trunk. Enhancing friction did nothing to slow the animal's colossal momentum, and increasing it only made the sparking thing faster. "Headshot!" He shouted at the top of his lungs, leaping over a trunk swipe. "Get your butt back here--" The side of a tusk collided with his chest, sending the scrawny Epic sprawling across the floor and into a glass display case. -------------------------------------------------------------- Lightwards let out a low groan as the world reappeared around him. Destroyed snowglobes were laying all around him, and his chest felt like it had been kicked by an elephant. To top off his condition, colors danced before his eyes. Possibly hallucinations brought on by the pain. Oh wait. It was just Doctor Funtimes. "You're late," Lightwards moaned irritably, ignoring the fact that he hadn't supplied them with a time. He tried to get onto his feet, but the pain in his chest blazed unbearably. He half-walked, half-collapsed into a dinosaur decorated beanbag as he tried to see behind Funtimes and Traveler. He got a brief impression of his elephantine Warrior slamming Quickslide with a tusk, sending the nasty little man flying out of view. Lightwards started to chuckle, but cut off at the pain in his side. "Doctor," he said weakly between painful breaths. "I hope you're not too busy at the moment? I could use some ibuprofen."

Purelaker fish 4 Epics 30 (What's the immune number for the second round? I can't remember.) Twinborn 14 Feruchemist 5

Purelaker fish 5 Epics 28 Twinborn 15 Feruchemist 8

I am currently re-reading Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton and The Lost World by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. This is the third time for both of them, though I've never read them both at once before. Together they make for a beautifully perceptive reading experience, as the differences between 19th and 20th century paleontology consensuses become exceedingly striking in their contrast. While Doyle envisions the creatures as lumbering (although dangerous) brutes, Crichton follows the modern interpretation of bird-like, intelligent dinosaurs.

That settles it, King Kamehamayhem the Surfboard Epic is totally becoming my secondary Epic.

Purelaker fish 5 Epics 27 Twinborn 16 Feruchemist 12

If we need another Epic for the armory raid, I'd be glad to supply Ron Wilson, Bus Driver. He can drive any bus at peak efficiency. (I happen to love that movie.)

That's not useless. That's a stroke of genius.

Hello there, 17th Shard. This fine forum is a wonderful place to meet people with similar interests to oneself. Aside from the uniting fandom of Brandon Sanderson, I've seen people commute over a wide variety of shared interests. There is one interest of one that I have held since I was a wee little lad and persists to this day: the amateur study of paleontology. I am obsessed with dinosaurs and extinct life in general. The idea that marvelous beasts roamed the Earth millions of years before our species fills me with wonder. When I'm not reading about Allomancers or alien races, I can be found enthusiastically digging into all manner of dinosaur-related texts, be they Thomas Holtz's Dinosaur Encyclopedia or Michael Crichton's Jurassic Park. While bragging would be wholly unlike me, I pride myself on the useless ability to list factoids about an innumerable number of extinct species. So here is my question to the forum at large: are there any other dinosaur nuts here? Are there any other lifelong fans of the Walking with Dinosaurs documentaries? Are there any others here who own and frequently consult large books searching for obscure species? If so, let us delight in discussing our favorite species and paleontological materials!

Suuuuure you don't have a problem. Moving right along, does everyone have a problem with me giving Quickslide a face-full of elephant going next in Oregon?

Purelaker fish 9 Epics 24 Twinborn 18 Feruchemist 12

I knew it.

Once the spambots see that comment, don't worry. I'm sure there will be.

Mistborn trilogy spoilers:

This wouldn't have happened if you people were carrying out your duties. Downvote for Peter and country, people.

I've been controlling my opponents as well--as long as we're all reasonable and try to stay consistent with one another, I imagine that should keep working fine. Edgedancer is in charge of overall strategic decisions, and I'd definitely say to check with him before actually killing one of them. And TwiLyght? You seem to be addicted to shipping now. You, ma'am, may have a problem.

Smedry Talents 0 Purelaker fish 10 Epics 24 Twinborn 17 Feruchemist 15

Smedry Talents 9 Purelaker fish 17 Epics 24 Twinborn 14 Feruchemist 15 Either possibility is equally plausible. Also, if Epics get killed off, can Lightwards revive them?

So, as the possibility of Lightwards being around Epic corpses has increased lately, shall we perhaps discuss whether or not Lightwards will be allowed to create Epic Warriors of Light? I do not believe we've established a consensus on whether the process would work or not. My brother--whom I've been keeping up to date on the game's events--put forward the hypothesis that Lightwards' primary power is self-resurrection, and his necromancy is actually a form of gifting. It's an interesting way of looking at it, albeit a way of looking at it I'd never considered. If this explanation is an accurate way of explaining it, then it would most likely not work on other Epics. Thoughts?

Not even the Chinese government and the ethical debate surrounding the illegal animal trade.

I should file an official report to the Court about this.

The Snow Queen from Newcago, eh?

I milk a goat, feed chickens, and help write educational topics for a homeschooling curriculum.

I see someone's been peeking at "What Happened in Oregon", page 27. And that sounds good. I think we need to gather Lightwards, the Ludicous Duo, and Purple Phoenix as quickly as possible if we are to avoid being massacred by our ridiculously overpowered "minor" Epics.

So... The other day, I watched an episode of the show. And I thought it was kind of cheesy how much of an emphasis the ponies placed on friendship, to the point of actually defeating villains with the unadulterated power of "love" and "friendship." But then I realized that ponies are herd animals, and that it makes sense that their culture would be strongly based around forming stable group dynamics. And it makes sense that their magic, such as the Elements of Harmony, would be designed with these traits in mind, just like how our computer systems are built with human psychology in mind. So while an alien anthropological study is probably not what Ms. Lauren Faust had in mind, it actually makes sense from a serious, even realistic perspective. And now I find myself creating elaborate timelines in which the ponies inhabit a parallel universe in which the prehistoric horse Mesohippus became the dominant species instead of primates, just as the Shards of Discord and Friendship came to settle upon the planet. Such is the power of My Little Pony. Friendship is inter-species understanding and accurate depictions of non-human beings.