Kobold King

I've been meaning to give Portland some attention, but I keep getting distracted by flying pigs and samurai pandas squeeeee! Ahem. I'll post for Lightwards soon. In the meantime, I got bored and decided nobody really needs sleep.

Forgive me if this question has already been answered, or if I'm grossly misunderstanding the way the magic works--I learn best by immersion, and I can't always keep details in my head properly. The familiar spirits intrigue me. Do they possess human or near human intelligence, and if so, would I be eligible to play as another's PC's familiar animal?

So... how have our plans for Baxter Game's introduction changed with this situation? Will Autumn and the Epics still push to his infirmary, or will we see him first tending to squirrel bites?

Agreed, everything's been really awesome writing so far. It's just a given that when you combine men with supernatural powers, paramilitary organizations, and delusional panda samurai all in one RP, a few logical inconsistencies will start to build up.

1. Arsenal lampshaded the change in scenery not being detected, but I see how it could bug you. I guess Panda just arranged it very quickly, disguising the forts as trees? However it happened, The post-Panda Dalles is going to become a much stricter place. Expect Arsenal to receive even more power and credibility, which is bad news for everyone. 2. Not necessarily. I can't imagine what kind of keenly focused mind it would take to notice that out of six or seven hundred flying pigs rampaging through the sky and raining trained attack squirrels, a few dozen were moving in a straight line to a certain place. 3. and 4. The most inexplicable occurrences here are Reader's guards being something less than professional here. My best guess is that Informant actually does have the ability to implant subliminal messages, and he's been grooming the church's guards for particular reactions for weeks now.

I'm always torn between laughing at the Panda's POVs, or declaring him infinitely more horrifying than Slaughterhouse. 0.o

"Inconceivable!"

They left the church, entering the open air of The Dalles. For the first time Backtrack was getting a good look at the city--this time he wasn't in the back of an armored car. It didn't look like a half bad place to live, all things considered. There was a liveliness to the town that was missing in Portland, and it wasn't just because of the invasion. Though there were tanks on the street and civilians rushing into their homes, there were signs of habitation everywhere. Several times they passed notices plastered on the walls of buildings, detailing instructions from the City Guard. Occasionally they passed recruitment posters, and once or twice he even saw advertisements for various sales from local businesses. The powers that ruled The Dalles did so with some degree of benevolence, it seemed. He hadn't been in Portland long, but Backtrack had very definitely gotten the impression of a city crammed with terrified people there. The Dalles was strict and rigidly organized, to be certain... but at least the people got to live somewhat normal lives. That was a thought way more comforting than Autumn's expression. The woman's face had contorted into a tight, unhappy kind of look when he'd asked how much further Koschei lived, though whether her face bespoke anger or fear was difficult to tell. She explained that he wasn't far, easily within walking distance. "Just do everything he says," Autumn instructed as they walked. "This invasion's bound to make him nervous." Backtrack gulped at the thought of a nervous Koschei the Deathless. He wondered--would Koschei be more or less inclined to slit random throats when he was nervous? If he followed the pattern of most Epics, he'd be a very definite more kind of person. Sparks. He felt his steps dragging slightly, though he knew he had no choice but to accompany Autumn and her soldiers. The ginger woman seemed to notice his discomfort, and spoke with the apparent intention of soothing him. "He's not that bad, though," she explained. "Honestly. He likes kids." Images of Koschei with a knife to a little girl's throat sprung to mind unbidden. Backtrack shuddered, only barely noticing the sad expression that flickered across Autumn's face. "Sorry," she repeated softly. "He…he really likes kids. You'll see." I bet I will, Backtrack thought glumly. His feet dragging like iron weights, he marched behind Autumn to the sound of blaring sirens. And... something else, perhaps. There was another high-pitched squeal in the air, one that irritated his ears worse than the sirens. Like a thousand screams all at once, all intent on bursting his eardrums. Backtrack paused in his steps for a moment, putting his fingers into his ears. "You've got the most annoying sirens ever," he complained, glaring at the nearest guards. The guards, oddly enough, were staring at the sky with looks of shock and dismay. Backtrack frowned--not only were the guards acting weird, but the sunlight had suddenly gotten a lot dimmer. He looked into the sky just as it started raining squirrels. Arsenal felt his eyebrows raising in disgust as Emma Runes told her story. Quicksilver's gotten bolder, he thought furiously. If Vondra let me organize those door-to-door searches, we'd have caught and executed him by now. We won't have an army left by the time we get him in front of the firing squad. Though his blood pressure rose rapidly throughout Edgerunner's explanation, he remained quiet and collected until she finished. "Now, what's this about pandas?" she asked. "It started just twenty minutes ago," Arsenal explained gruffly. With some difficulty he refrained from adding "And it would have ended twenty minutes ago, if I were in charge." "We started getting calls from the soldiers around the city limits," he went on dryly. "They reported animals coming out of the countryside and approaching the city. All instances of the threat were described as giant pandas, standing on their hind legs and carrying wooden weapons. There wasn't any time to respond to the threat before they started launching flaming arrows." He decided to allow himself a scowl and a small tirade. "The invaders have stationed themselves all around the town, like they expect to besiege us. They've established wooden structures to camp out in--which our patrols should have found, if they weren't caught up in the sloth and complacency that plagues this town." Shaking his head with a grimace, Arsenal continued. "Sloth and complacency," he hissed scathingly. That's what plagues this town, and that's what'll finish it. Mark my words." "What the sparks?" Arsenal shot his head towards the sound. All around the three Epics, soldiers scurried around the HQ's courtyard, shouting orders and surprised exclamations. He opened his mouth to shout a few reprimands of his own, but stopped when the sky darkened. The sky darkened as if a cloud had drifted over the sun. The sound of sirens began to clash with another louder, more high-pitched sound. A sound which took Daniel Dewhickey back in time; back to his boyhood on the family farm. It was the sound of squealing pigs. Hundreds of them, born by white feathered wings over The Dalles' sky. Arsenal continued staring at the invading swarm, as the sounds of squealing swine mixed with the droning of anti-aircraft guns from around the HQ. Anti-aircraft guns which he himself had installed. Shaking himself from his momentary confusion, he turned to Edgedancer and Glamour with a glare. "Do you hear that?" he demanded furiously. "That sound you hear, of the town going to hell in a handbasket? That's the sound of you two slacking off. Battle stations, both of you!" He turned away from them brusquely, summoning an umbrella into his hand as the first flying squirrels dropped from the sky.

I haven't noticed a decline in quality either. Awesome! I'm writing up a Backtrack/Arsenal post now too. Panda's last post was kind of a game changer, what with the swarm of flying death swine and all.

1. I get the feeling that Panda values the sanctity of the panda image above all other things. In his warped, bamboo-obsessed mind painting over the white spots might be OK, but removing them altogether would be sacrilege. 2. Maybe he altered their weight/densities? I'm not a physicist, but maybe that would soften their landings? Otherwise he'd just have to fasten them with parachutes, which would be just as adorably awesome. Speaking of awesome--that post was amazing. The fact that it's prompted so many questions and so much speculation only bespeaks the interest it's helped kindle in us all.

Our resident Doctor gets to fight both of them at some point, right? Uh, I guess Team Vondra just needs to put together a battle plan. Vondra needs to get in the helicopter so he can personally gain an assessment of the situation, and that'll be timed to happen along with Reader getting kidnapped.

"Squire, squire, pants on fire"...?

...that's odd. I seem to have been typing up a post describing how much I love the concept of Panda's new Epic. I seem to have used the words "awesome" and "creative" multiple times. Funny thing is, I can't remember any new Epics on this page... (If we just gave him the power to plant subliminal messages, we'd have our very own representative of the Silence in Oregon.)

Most people wouldn't have the knowledge that power use causes corruption, though; in the eyes of most post-Calamity denizens, the only factors in whether an Epic is good or evil are personal judgement and self-control. And in my experience... well, most people tend to assume, consciously or unconsciously, that they'd make better judgements than evildoers. Without the whole picture, a new Epic would either be too frightened of himself to use his powers, or would have enough faith in himself to believe he'd do the right thing. Most people have insecurities... but everyone thinks that he or she is inherently a good person. I know I do, to some extent or another--and that would be my downfall in the Reckoners universe.

I think that most Epics who got their powers after Annexation Day wake up one morning, find out they've gotten superpowers, and decide "Finally, a decent human being gets these powers." I imagine that Sightline Syndrome is fairly common in post-Annexation Epics. We're not seriously considering making a Santa Claus Epic, are we?

There are plenty of backgrounds available for use on the creator itself. Click the "Backgrounds" tab on the right hand side of the program. I don't know why I'm grinning so much at this. But I am. In other news, Reason 417 to despise Koschei the Deathless: being primarily a gifter, Calamity's corruption was probably not a major factor in his atrocities. He acted predominantly of his own free will.

Welcome to the 17th Shard! Which Sanderson books have you read? On another note, my knowledge of any Pokemon past the first 151 is a kind of foggy. Is your profile picture Gardevoir?

Maybe the whole of Oregon was deemed "naughty," so Santa Claus Calamity gave it a lump of "coal" in the form of Nighthound?

Guys, I think I know what--or who--Calamity is. It's big and red. It gives gifts. It exists in a far away, hard-to-reach location. It is capable of defying the laws of physics. It sees you when you're sleeping. It influences whether you're naughty or nice. If we can just confirm December 25th as the publication date of Calamity, this will be entirely confirmed.

I wish my name were Harold, 'cuz then I would be Harold the Herald.

They're both big and red. They both influence whether you're naughty or nice. They are both capable of defying the laws of physics. They both exist in far away, not easily accessible places. (space, the north pole) They both see you when you're sleeping. (conjecture) This theory is now legit.

At Christmas, The Dalles is wholly decorated with mistletoe, with a modified tradition: If you find yourself under the mistletoe with Reader, you're allowed to punch him in the face with no repercussions.

Honestly, my Google searches kept proclaiming "Britanic" to be a male name. I thought Britanic Jerald Jansink was, by extension, male. Which is better... going 300 days without punching Reader, or getting free drinks at the Springfield for punching Reader?

Would Britanic Jerald Jansink also become a character, then?