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Posted

Dude. In, like, a thousand days, there's gonna be this... 4evastorm, and it's gonna be radical.

Arrrgh! It is here! They are crawling on my brain! The metal, the metal! We are dead!!!

*goes uncouncious from overdose*

Posted

My favorite part is the sci-fi mismatch in the Bridge Four scenes. "Hexagramic wards are breaking down." :lol:.

 

I like the part where Kaladin built a suit of power armor (bridgeplate?) in a chasm with a pile of bodies.

 

As for the sci-fi mish-mash... Kaladin had a really, really weird life in the four years between Tien dying and killing Davar (and subsequently becoming a slave).

Posted

I like the part where Kaladin built a suit of power armor (bridgeplate?) in a chasm with a pile of bodies.

As for the sci-fi mish-mash... Kaladin had a really, really weird life in the four years between Tien dying and killing Davar (and subsequently becoming a slave).

Well, he probably had learned much if it before joining the army, considering evil!Lirin has a surgical chainsword and Tien discovered fissionspren.

I wouldn't put it past him to create his own script based on those stellar sequencies he talked about in order to write that book of his.

Or to use gravitation to travel faster than light and introduce Rashek and Renarin to one another :ph34r:.

Posted

Well, he probably had learned much if it before joining the army, considering evil!Lirin has a surgical chainsword and Tien discovered fissionspren.

I wouldn't put it past him to create his own script based on those stellar sequencies he talked about in order to write that book of his.

Or to use gravitation to travel faster than light and introduce Rashek and Renarin to one another :ph34r:.

 

Huh. Albecurrie Lashing?

 

evil!Lirin is... Well, put it this way. Mr. T has a lot of expenses, and the Palanaeum entry fees and other revenue don't cover all of them. He had to make some money with exports.

 

And the stellar sequences are basically fusion reactions; the biggest ones are the proton-proton chain in Main Sequence stars, and the CNO (carbon-nitrogen-oxygen) cycle in the larger ones.

 

The book was a spot of dark humor. It has nothing to do with fusion.

 

Posted (edited)

RENARIN: You know man, it's great to finally meet someone who actually knows how to run a kingdom.

 

RASHEK: Yeah, that Elocar guy sounds like rusting moron. You want another hit?

RENARIN: Don't mind if I do...

 

(RENARIN takes a hit of ATIUM)

 

RENARIN: And now my sword starts screamin' at me and... I don't know, some days.

 

RASHEK: This one time I had a sword that was all 'Destroy Evil' and I just couldn't handle that ash.

 

RENARIN: And now we've got that big fight with those red guys comming up and I still can't do crem...

RASHEK: Want to borrow a few thousand Koloss? I got a bunch of 'em runnin around...

 

RENARIN: Nah man, too many questions.

 

So is this our introduction to "It's a Hard Shard Life: The Choronicles of the 17th Shard and other Worldhoppers"? ;)

Edited by lookingglass
Posted

Are other people allowed to do this for other books?

 

If you'd like, you're welcome to as long as you can fight off my army of high-visibility ninja assassins.

 

What were you thinking of doing?

Posted

I think I missed most of the references in this latest one...

 

Still funny though.

 

I am a bit disappointment that Kaladin didn't volunteer as a tribute in Tien's place for the Reckoning Games, though...

Posted

I think I missed most of the references in this latest one...

 

Still funny though.

 

It was... harder to make this part funny. I was really reaching in a lot of places.

 

I am a bit disappointment that Kaladin didn't volunteer as a tribute in Tien's place for the Reckoning Games, though...

 

He didn't do that, because that would be terrible.

 

Perhaps doing a Mistborn one? Or Steelheart?

 

I had some plans for Mistborn, specifically The Hero of Ages 18-24. Excerpt:

 

 

Elend considered what he knew about the Koloss. They ranged from five to twelve feet tall, and had a fairly short life expectancy; their 'kulture', such as it was, came down brutally on even minor breaches of etiquette, and any who survived that would die of heart failure as they grew. Their monocles could project a devastating blast of energy, and while it's effective range was no more than a few feet, it's a brutal power made fighting the Koloss difficult for ordinary men. The size of a Koloss population could be controlled by manipulating the number of monocles and top hats available...

 

He frowned. Why was he thinking about anthropology at a time like this?

Posted

guys, I'm a decent comic artist.... what if i turned this entire thing into a few comic strips?(I'd just use what's already been posted)

Posted

guys, I'm a decent comic artist.... what if i turned this entire thing into a few comic strips?(I'd just use what's already been posted)

 

Buddy, look at me. Look at me. Yes.

Posted (edited)

YEAH I"M DOING THIS

(Though it may take a while, and it won't be even close to perfect ;))

Edited by CarolaDavar
Posted

YEAH I"M DOING THIS

(Though it may take a while, and it won't be even close to perfect ;))

 

Well, you can use the orignial jokes, or your own if you have any ideas, or I could probably come up with more stupid. Basically, Kaladin and Renarin are the sane/competent ones (relatively speaking), Shallan has a very selective memory, resulting in alarmingly frequent segmentation faults, Dalinar... Has mostly stopped fighting it.

  • 4 weeks later...
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