Nightwatcher Boon/Bane (Game)

[ShardShaper he/him]

Granted. Your dog turns into a CAT (AKA Shard of evil) and eats your cleaning cloths

 

I wish I could spel evry wrd croctly.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

15 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

Granted. Your dog turns into a CAT (AKA Shard of evil) and eats your cleaning cloths

 

I wish I could spel evry wrd croctly.

Granted. But autocorrect always changes it to the exact opposite of what you want to say.

 

 

I wish that I could be Edward Scissorhands for Halloween.

Edited April 20, 2019 by BringerofShadows

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

1 hour ago, BringerofShadows said:

Granted. But autocorrect always changes it to the exact opposite of what you want to say.

 

 

I wish that I could be Edward Scissorhands for Halloween.

Granted, you undergo surgery where your hands are cut off, and scissor blades are attached instead.

 

I wish to never be sick or injured.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

2 hours ago, Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker said:

Granted, you undergo surgery where your hands are cut off, and scissor blades are attached instead.

 

I wish to never be sick or injured.

Granted. You are sent to a lab to be tested, to figure out why this never happens.

 

 

 

 

I wish that Inception was real.

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

10 hours ago, BringerofShadows said:

Granted. You are sent to a lab to be tested, to figure out why this never happens.

 

 

 

 

I wish that Inception was real.

Alas, the nightwatcher tells you that creating a new reality is beyond her, so instead she turns you into a FAKE character in said “Inception.”

 

I wish for the ability to create magic cards out of thin air.

[overlord stick]

Granted, they're cards with naked anime girls on them.

I wish for a better computer.

[ShardShaper he/him]

Granted. In order to grant this wish, the nightwatcher first makes your computer WAY worse, then reverts it back to normal.*

 

I wish I all my food was hemalurgicaly spiked. 

 

*Disclaimer: The nightwatcher does not know what a computer is, and gives you a hemalurgicaly spiked waffle.  

Edited April 20, 2019 by ShardShaper

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

1 hour ago, ShardShaper said:

Granted. In order to grant this wish, the nightwatcher first makes your computer WAY worse, then reverts it back to normal.*

 

I wish I all my food was hemalurgicaly spiked. 

 

*Disclaimer: The nightwatcher does not know what a computer is, and gives you a hemalurgicaly spiked waffle.  

Granted, all of your food is hemalurgicaly spiked, granting you the powers of a Fullborn Fullbinder. However, Jar Jar Binks ascends to Ruin and now controls you.

 

I wish I had the power to mute people.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Granted. But you can’t unmute them.

 

 

 

I wish Robin Williams was still alive.

[Lunamor she/her]

57 minutes ago, Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker said:

Granted, all of your food is hemalurgicaly spiked, granting you the powers of a Fullborn Fullbinder. However, Jar Jar Binks ascends to Ruin and now controls you.

 

I wish I had the power to mute people.

Granted. The Nightwatcher hands you a remote. A particularly annoying person walks up to you, blabbing their head off about how they just bought a new pair of shoes. You smugly lift the remote, point it their direction, and press the mute button. The person continues moving their mouth, but you can’t hear a thing. You smile, happy that their endless chatter has been extinguished. You then glance back downwards at the remote, noticing its other buttons. You become curious, unnaturally curious. Something is pushing you, begging you to press another button. You begin to hear a strange noise, one that slowly starts to surround you, feeling eerily familiar. Static. You glance back upwards from the remote, and find that the sky has begun to darken. You are relieved when a white patch appears in the sky, banishing a small patch of the darkness. But then another appears. And another. Some start to disappear. Soon, the entire sky becomes this alternating, random pattern of white and black. The pattern speeds up, the sound becoming more oppressive. You back away, terrified, knowing that something is very, very wrong. You look down, seeking to avert your eyes from the almost hypnotizing pattern above. But, against all odds, you see something even more sinister. Against your will, your finger is ever so slowly moving towards the power button. You try and stop it, but you seem to be frozen, unable to do anything but stare. It hovers over the button for just a second, then plunges downwards, pressing it. You flinch and cover your head, waiting for the inevitable. After a while with nothing happening, you peer back out. You notice an old television sitting nearby. It has been turned on, static covering its screen. The sky has been turned back to normal. You place the remote on top of the television, then run from the valley as fast as you can, highly disturbed and wishing to never see it again. The person you muted silently watches your retreating shadow, furious that you would steal away their voice. They turn towards the remote, and a slight smile touches their lips. They pick up the remote, and slowly stalk your direction, determined to exact revenge upon you no matter the cost. Good luck with that.

I wish that everyone would just admit that waffles are better than pancakes.

Edit: Darn, Ninja’d!

Granted, but he is a zombie.

Edited April 20, 2019 by Lunamor

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Quote

Sorry @Lunamor!!! That was an excellent post, and I ruined it. 

Granted, but you suddenly hate waffles and love pancakes. Now everyone hates you. (Except me, of course)

 

 

I wish for Disney NOT to take over the world.

 

 

 

[Lunamor she/her]

Just now, BringerofShadows said:

Granted, but you suddenly hate waffles and love pancakes. Now everyone hates you. (Except me, of course)

 

 

I wish for Disney NOT to take over the world.

 

 

 

Quote

It’s ok!

Granted, Disney disappears. Say goodbye to Marvel, Star Wars, Pixar, and everything else they have accumulated over the years.

I wish for a bottle of syrup that never runs out.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Granted. But now everything you touch turns to syrup.

 

 

 

 

I wish that I was unconditionally loved by a good person.

[Lunamor she/her]

3 minutes ago, BringerofShadows said:

Granted. But now everything you touch turns to syrup.

 

 

 

 

I wish that I was unconditionally loved by a good person.

Granted. The Nightwatcher hands you a dog. Now you have to scoop its poop all the time.

I wish for more people to read Sanderson.

[Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker he/him]

Granted, Sanderson has such a spike in popularity that he stops the Cosmere, and only writes Skyward sequels.

I wish that pineapple on pizza becomes illegal.

Edited April 20, 2019 by Lord Mistborn Bondbreaker

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Granted. Crime rates have skyrocketed, because the police have focused on catching people smuggling pineapple onto pizza.

 

 

 

I wish I didn’t have to say ‘I wish’ all the time.

Edited April 20, 2019 by BringerofShadows

[ShardShaper he/him]

Granted. The nightwatcher is so happy with that wish, that she refuses to give you a curse.

 

I wish for clear weather

Edited April 20, 2019 by ShardShaper

[BringerofShadows she/her]

You got Ninja’d.

[ShardShaper he/him]

Yes. As a reward for ninjaing me, do you want a free hemalurgicly spiked chasmfiend? If so, click here 

 

 

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Nah. I like my soul as it is, thanks.

[Lunamor she/her]

14 minutes ago, ShardShaper said:

I wish for clear weather

Granted. The sky becomes clear, and can no longer be seen. The entire world goes into mass hysteria.

I wish for an onion.

Edited April 20, 2019 by Lunamor

[Bookish Ocelot she/her]

Granted. The onion is the property of John Wick, who is angered at the loss of his onion. 

I wish for an unlimited supply of books I will enjoy. 

[Lunamor she/her]

Just now, BookishOcelot said:

Granted. The onion is the property of John Wick, who is angered at the loss of his onion. 

I wish for an unlimited supply of books I will enjoy. 

Granted, but you get crushed under the weight of all of them.

I wish for a pug.

[overlord stick]

Granted, but it's dead.

I wish I didn't have to go to church.

[BringerofShadows she/her]

Granted, you can’t go to the Church of the Stick. 

 

 

 

 

I wish that Notre Dame didn’t catch on fire.