if you refuse to differentiate between a catapult and a trebuchet, because they, "perform the same function" then you must also not differentiate between a catapult and a cannon.
1473. Hold a closed casket funeral, and make the coffon a jack-in-the-box with the actual corpse. Set it off when the mother/wife of the decessed walks up to the coffin.
Granted. You somehow complete the very last bit of homework you will ever do, in your life, and now don't have the strength to finish today's.
I wish didn't need sleep, and lived a normal human lifespan with this boon.