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Just-A-Stick

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Just-A-Stick last won the day on April 11

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About Just-A-Stick

  • Birthday January 22

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  • Member Title
    My Jesus is SO COOL!!
  • Pronouns
    she/her
  • Location
    With @SmilingPanda19 and @Part of The Narative in our Walmart dumpster
  • Interests
    hi :)
    i love jesus, thrifting, and reading
    i'm an amateur potter, sort of broke, a student, an artist, a child of God, a poet, a choir kid, a lover of nature and a huger of people and trees.
    i'm a bit quirky but its okay because i was made exactly how i was supposed to be made, and i'm learning to love who i am in Christ!
    please feel free to PM me to hear my testimony, ask questions, hear encouragement, or genuinely just talk to me
    (i'm one of those rare people-loving introverts <3)

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  1. Just-A-Stick

    Poem

    Spoiler

    Identity

     
    “You’d be nothing without her, you know?”
     
    Yeah, I know…
     
    “You’re lucky she’s your friend, or you’d still have no style.”
     
    Yeah… very lucky…
     
    “You’re just trying to be like her.”
     
    I know…
     
     
    “You’re such a good writer!
    You’re so pretty!
    You’re so kind!
    So gentle!
    You’re a good person.”
     
    Is that really who I am?
    Or am I just the one
    Who stumbles along,
    Stealing pieces of
    Other people and
    Calling them mine.
     
    I pretend I know how to act
    Pretend I have a style
    Pretend I actually know what
    I’m doing
     
    Pretend I understand your jokes
    Because ignorance might make
    Me stupid
     
    I have no identity other than
    This mask
     
    My ever-shifting,
    Reflecting mask
    Turning tightly to keep
    The wounds inside
    And invisible
     
    But underneath,
    Inside,
    There’s just a lonely
    Shadow
    An emptiness
    A ghost,
    Watching the outside world,
    Trying to be normal
    Trying to fit in,
    Yet slowly realizing,
    She never actually has
    Anywhere.
     
    She’s scared to adopt any identity,
    Even the things she tells herself.
    Because, if her entire identity
    Is Worthless,
    Is there any hope at all?
     
    Does she have an identity
    Away from her insecurities?
     
    Who is she, if not Broken?
    If not Lost?
    If not Hurting?
    Scarred?
    Ugly?
    Fearful?
    A Liar?
    Stupid,
    Not good enough,
    Fat,
    A burden,
    Messed up,
    Abandoned,
    Selfish,
    A mistake,
    A shadow?
     
    Not fully dead,
    But not alive,
    Either.
     
    Halfway here,
    Halfway gone.
     
    A failure.
    A stranger.
    Different,
    Strange,
    Weird,
    Creepy…
     
    One who doesn’t fully belong
    Anywhere,
    So why is she still here?
     
    One who selfishly
    Needs to be needed,
    Who wishes that someone
    Expressed their love for her
    The way she does for others,
    Who’s clingy and scared,
    But supposed to be strong,
    Who’s covered in wounds,
    Some visible, some not,
    She loses herself in stories,
    Because maybe there,
    She can find herself.
    She won’t be such
    A burden,
    Such a mistake,
    So needy,
    Helpless.
     
    Even if she only finds
    A few fragments,
    It’s maybe better than
    Nothing.
    Because she,
    Is nothing.
     
     
    ~ Stick 6-18-24

     

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. Just-A-Stick

      Just-A-Stick

      @Through The Living Glass- I do know, and it's very much appreciated ❤️‍🩹

      @Just a Silvereye- Thank you so much! (did you actually cry? :o.

    3. Throw TheLiving Silverware

      Throw TheLiving Silverware

      I was close to.

      And that's a lot, because for some reason, I never cry over media ever.

    4. Just-A-Stick

      Just-A-Stick

      Aww <33

      *big hugs*

       

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