kajsa ㅇㅅㅇ

I just spent the last 25 minutes cleaning cat puke out of my carpet. Oslo has been sick for h the past few days and it’s stressing me out a little bit.

My mom wants to take us all out today, get us out of the house before we do leisure stuff. She wants to take us to the zoo or to Mahoney or somewhere where we have to be around people and walk a lot. In the heat. But I. Am. EXHAUSTED. I worked my ass off this whole week, around too many loud people, and everything hurts. It feels like I have cold knives and shrapnel in my swollen ankle. My bones ache and I have the worst scudding headache. I’m also experiencing a high level of hormones and it’s increasing my anxiety.

And of course I don’t want to be with my mom. I wanted to go to the College World Series with my dad even though I can’t help fundraise (it’s a fundraiser for show choir, long story) just because I’m so tired of being around Mom. Last night when she was taking me to my friend’s birthday party, she basically just weighed my mind down with all the many things we have to do this week. Like why is she even telling me? It’s not like I’m even going to have anything to say, and she knows it.

Every time words come out of her mouth, it’s nebulous and lengthy. Something that should take five minutes to say takes her thirty. Which is weird because she’s supposed to be good with words.