Hollow Graves

Okay. Dump time.

I have failing school right now. There are 4 weeks left of term and I am two weeks behind. All of my grades are f's. And I don't have time to get everything done and it is stressing me out. Especially with my parents getting mad at me for being this far behind as well. I literally only do homework these days. Every little time to do what brings me joy. 

On top of that. I have been 16 since September, and I don't even have a driving permit. And my friends keep pushing me. They are always asking when I am getting my license or a permit. Why am I not doing what they think I should be doing. And I have tried to tell them that my family does have money for me to get a license and be on the insurance. But they are just thinking that it is an excuse to get them to drive me everywhere. And so now I don't know what to do with that relationship because she is my best friend. But she is adding a whole other layer of stress. I have the hardest time not just screaming and crying when ever she asks and gives me a disappointed look.

My other friends hate me and think I am a jerk. And the girl I like thinks I am insane.

My parents on top of the grades disappointment, are disappointed in me not being straight. And they don't support me at all. And they are trying to force be to go back to church.

So all of that is a mess and it is making me a mess. And personally it gets really hard to find a point in living. And I know that sounds drastic but my life is falling to pieces. I have no one here to help me and I cry myself to sleep everynight.

The only reason I am trying is because my family is working on adopting a little girl. And she, without knowing it, is my will to live. But we wont be able to adopt anyone till next school year. So that isn't even helping me right now. 

I don't know what to do. Does any one have any advice.

Sorry this got so long and depressing.