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The Unknown Medallion

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Everything posted by The Unknown Medallion

  1. @Channelknight Fadran @2EmLee2 @Random Bystander @Omi the Counselor
  2. First of all, thanks for the feedback. Now I'll respond to most of it. I will, first person seems to be much easier, so I should be using that from here on out. Thank you, I feel that fights are my biggest strength, although I do have some problems that is will be correcting. That wasn't even meant to be a reveal, but on my rewrite I think I'll lean into that I little bit more. Thinking of my plan for the book, I don't think he really stops being proactive. I don't tend to have any problems with making them proactive, giving them good goals and motivations however, that I am not good at. Thanks, I'm pretty sure that was introduced in the thirdish mental draft of this book (this is the first physical draft, and the fourth mental draft). Also, if you have problems with soft magic systems, then I'll warn you that this has a soft magic system with lots of hard magic powers. That is my biggest weakness in my opinion. I already have some fixes in mind, but please point out whenever I start doing this because my mind has these places fully imagined, but the reader doesn't. Could you explain this one better? It seems like you're saying that there aren't really stakes? I'm not sure what this means. Also, I will be making some changes to make the skill levels of the two more obvious. No context to the Melee is definitely a problem, but I don't think the lack of explanation for the term "Null-Ranks" is too important. I might step it down to a normal noun because it's an equivalent to a army recruit in training. When I make the aforementioned changes to the fight, I'm planning on having him think about this to make that seem less abrupt. I'm not really sure how to explain that, in fact, I might remove it altogether and let the reader infer it. That's partially why I switched to first person. Thanks for pointing that out, even if I have no idea how to change it, but I doubt I'll have to use that sentence in the rewrite. Before I respond, one thing about chapter two. It isn't done yet, so the might be more problems later in the chapter. Thank you, I actually free wrote that story. Some quick history on most peasants having royal blood: During the early days of this kingdom, the royals had a tendency to marry anyone for alliance, no matter their social status, eventually there was quite a bit of royal blood within most people. As they spread about the land, the amount of royal blooded people ment that within a few generations, nearly everyone had royal blood. The concept of nobles grew from the habit of amount of royal blood deciding social status. Eventually, there grew to be a group of people who had consistantly married into the royal line. Due to the amount of royal blood these people had, they had immense social standing. Over time, these people gained so much power and wealth that they were becoming dangers to the royal family. The king at the time that made anyone with a sufficient amount of royal blood a "noble" therefore being unable to inherit and therefore having to pay taxes to the main royal family. I don't plan on them being important to the story, but a sword made by the swordsmith might appear at some point. Yep, worst problem here, nice to know it gets smoother. Thanks, I really enjoyed having some unbiased advice on the book.
  3. I'm so confused, in fact, that's partly why I haven't posted. I do think it's between Mat and Illwei, but I think there's a decent chance they're both elims. But Mat claimed Vin, which means we have to exe Illwei first, and if she's an elim, at the very least we got one, and at most we got an elim and an elim mistborn. Conveniently, Mat has used up both of his mistborn metals. I will vote Illwei as I think there is a chance Mat is Vin, but I think we should fifty-fifty it next cycle.
  4. Doesn't Shallan lend Kaladin her Patternblade in WoR, or was that her deadblade?
  5. Not official, an official summary would likely be a per game rule, it would be a more, would you trust this random player who might be a elim? Then you could have playstyles and other such things around it. If it were to become a major part of the community, one person could cross reference the different summary and have a whole new type of analysis. I doubt it will happen, but it would work and would be very interesting.
  6. Grei jerked forward, nearly yanking Double off his feet, probably would have if he wasn't tapping and burning his pewter at the same time. "You smell somethin' boy? Let's go." Grei started running faster.
  7. So, Stormreach essentially has every storm ever on Earth happening at the same time. Millions of square miles of rain falling at every moment, thousands of lightning strikes per minute, hail from the smallest speck to car sized, wind strong enough to flatten a city, enough snow to drown a million mammoths, it's crazy. The only reason they can stay alive is their magic, which comes in five types. Lightning magic, can draw lightning to you or to a specific spot. Rain magic, can create a decently large shield to keep rain away or can push rain in a certain direction. Wind magic, can control, slow, and speed up the wind. And hail/snow magic, can control, move, and sculpt hail or snow. There is an incredibly powerful wind controller moving the winds at all times, they also blow away the hail and the majority of the snow. The rain does get through albeit in small amounts. There are basically taxis that use rain shields to transport people from place to place. Hail and snow sculptors on the sides of the street, selling trinkets. And because lightning helps to grow plants in Stormreach, lightning controllers bringing down lightning strikes in the middle of gardens. The plot is this: The two most powerful wind controllers have both died in an unfortunate accident, and most people have taken to their homes in fear of car sized pieces of hail and wind powerful enough to flatten them. Small squads of rain, wind, and hail controllers have banded together to make the only possible transportation in the city. The plot will likely revolve around solving the "accidental" deaths of the wind controllers and/or the selection of new ones.
  8. It got eaten twice, short story short: I don't like how he's attempting to control the thread and how similar it is to the QF where he was elim. The second post alleviated my suspicion somewhat, but it isn't really enough. I would be ok with a Striker exe considering there's a fairly likely chance that he's a e!mistborn. I'll likely go with whichever exe picks up steam.
  9. I don't actually know if it's a WoB, I just think I've read that before.
  10. I don't think Hoid still has a Dawnshard, could be wrong on that. I'm pretty sure there's a WoB that they were used as magnets, so that makes me think four separate people used them.
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