Channelknight Fadran

Some scientific facts:

• Monty Python is the cinema equivalen of jazz.
• The scariness of a spider is not proportional to the size of the spider, but rather to the length of the spider's legs. Tarantulas are awesome and everyone knows it, but black widows are the freakiest and most hideous creatures known to man.
• When you're staring at the glowing red numbers on your alarm clock and all the shapes start to warp and corrupt, it is not your eyes playing tricks on you but rather your mind being suspended to the Plane of Dreams.
• Right next door to that is the Plane of the Forgotten, which is where pencils go when you drop them behind the couch and can't find them again.
• There was a little turtle tank in the nurse's office at my elementary school. This is not relevant but I just remembered that which I think is cool.
• There are three types of Ghibli fans: The normie Howl's Moving Castle enjoyers, the inexperienced Spirited Away watchers, and the chad Nausicaa stans. I've yet to meet another soul whose favorite Ghibli is Castle in the Sky yet, which means that the Truth has yet to spread to the masses
• Cool ranch doritos are meh at best and you know it.
• The masses fear the weebs, for people fear what they cannot know - that is, they do not fear true weebs, but rather the Demon Slayer junkies who haven't the spine to watch or read anything longer or more braindead than that. In fact, true weebs fear these junkies as well.
• People who ship Legolas and Gimli are stupid. People who ship Legolas and Aragorn are not. If you require an explanation for what happens with Arwen in this universe, simply leave it to Gimli to put on the charm because turns out he's really into elves.
• People who ship Frodo and Sam are stupider, and anyone who says otherwise will taste my katana.
• Before TotK came out, I considered BotW to be the best Zelda Game, and A Link to the Past to be the best Zelda Game. With this new addition to the cast, both those titles hang in the balance.
• I will not read your writing if it's in Arial font. All good prose deserves serifs.
• The Batman (2022) has no right being as good as it is.
• If you put me in the trolley problem scenaro to gather data you'd have to rule me out as an anomaly because whatever I decide to do is ultimately at odds with my innate clumsiness.
• I wonder if emptying your brain is a good way to knock yourself unconscious for the night? Or am I just forcing it to think harder about things that it really shouldn't when I'm trying to sleep?
• That last one wasn't a fact.
• It was a question.
• Tamales are either gross or made by a bona fide mexican guy and there is no in-between.
• It is impossible to make a good churro, which is the point.
• Sheev Palpatine really needs to work on his branding. The "Tragedy" of Darth Plagueis the Wise is barely a few lines of dialogue long - that isn't a tragedy, that's a synopsis. Give me a remake where the opera Anakin meets him at is a three-act musical about the rise and fall of Darth Plagueis, complete with a greek chorus and dudes wearing coconuts.
• Everyone says The Minish Cap is the most underrated Zelda game, which I think is ironic.
• By cubic meter you're actually hotter than the sun. Light also escapes you much faster than it does the core of that thing.
• I'm tired. I just yawned. What a day.
• You're yawning too now.
• Goodnight.