Do you think that, in the future Stormlight Archive books, Adolin's efforts will become clearer?
Anyway, @Jedal, I think that it's awesome that you can relate to spook so well. As readers, we want to be as amazing as those characters, want to be important. I branched off from that the wrong way. I've read books my whole life, and, being an optimist, I see the good things about trials and hidden pain. And that's not a good thing. I've grown up a privileged kid, not rich or anything, but still so much more privileged than so many people. As a bookworm from a young age, I saw all the tragic backgrounds of characters, saw how awesome they always always become, and I started wishing for terrible things to happen to me so that I could become as strong and experienced as them. Little did I know that most people that go through such hard things break down. The ones who were already strong enough to push through are the ones that become main characters.
I'm one of those people that want to be different, and self-prescribe(wrong word I think) themselves with a whole bunch of different mental problems. I'd do that to make myself be more of a character, rather than simply a person. I probably have at least one small disorder, but that's beside the point. And then I start hating myself for how stupid that is, and than I keep on hating myself because that hate is a trial in and of itself, and then I realize that I'm thinking the same bratty way, and then I shut down, go blank and emotionless on the inside, to stop the turmult of spiraling thoughts. And then it starts all over again, in many different kinds of ways.
(Sigh,) So, mostly I'll cover it up and just be happy. It's a problem that I can mostly ignore. I'll listen to audiobooks, ted talks, and podcasts so that I'm listening rather than thinking. It helps, and gives me motivation to simply read, write, draw, excercise, and work on my education. It's not all as bad as it seems. Back to the beginning, it's all just about how I think about things. When I do things I love, it brightens my mood and I don't get those stormcloud thoughts in the first place.
So, my point apperantly is, in away, that my life is both chaotic and simply bright at the exact same time. (Those are both better than feeling nothing, though.)
You were all talking about that kind of stuff . . . and I could relate . . . so yah . . . go Shallan. . . . (Embarrassed smile)
I can't tell how I sound in this. Do I come across as one who has gone through a trial, or one who isn't prepared at all for the more tangent of life's difficulties? I, myself can't figure it out.