kari-no-sugata

This has occurred to me too. Brandon is aware of the frustrations fans have with love triangles so I'm think Brandon would also be well aware that this trope has been overused. Under that assumption, it seems more likely to me that he's subverting the trope rather than simply using it as is. But we'll obviously have to wait and see. I would say that the argument that @maxal is making is really "for Adolin's character arc to have a fulfilling conclusion then he would need to have a successful romantic relationship and that achieving that seems improbable without Shallan". Given how often it's been pointed out that Adolin has had a huge number of failed relationships, it's clearly a major aspect of his character. Of course, there's no guarantee that he will actually get a fulfilling conclusion - like with any character. Speaking as a Shallan fan, I would say that so far it's Shallan herself who has been solving her inner problems, with some significant help/prompting from Pattern, and I think it's more likely that this will continue. I do feel that Adolin is helping her with her lack of self-confidence, though Shallan following what she understood of Jasnah's advice also helped. Overall I would say that Adolin is more likely to help Shallan as he accepts her as she is and being with him gives her peace of mind and contentment. So while I don't think Shallan "needs" Adolin to progress as a character I do think she'll get there faster with him (so far at least).

It's worth remembering that those attributes are fallible and some are definitely wrong. My guess is that all of Kaladin's future Oaths will be more of the same and focus around aspects of protecting - under the assumption that it related to the core nature of the spren in question. It'll be interesting to see how things look when we have a much better idea of what typical Oaths look like for all levels and all Orders. For example, are many of the Orders systematic and follow a common pattern? Or are they all unique and distinct? So far, the Lightweavers are the only known "special case" for the method of advancement but what about the ones that use Oaths? It would be interesting to know how the styles of the Oaths developed. I strongly suspect that they evolved over time. There might be some convergent evolution going on and it's also possible that there was some re-organising of it at some point.

Someone might have suggested this already, but anyway, a thought on Kaladin and his possible next Oath... Kaladin's life was significantly affected by Tien's death and also Amaram's betrayal. One consequence is that Kaladin has a negative outlook regarding lighteyes - he's improved in this regard but it's still there. He often seems to take the attitude of a "rebel" against the oppression of the lighteyes, though not so much any more. In the Oathbringer blurb we see this: Given the latest chapter from his POV, I think we'll start to see this really come out. The parshmen were absolute slaves. Kaladin was also a slave. They can be viewed as victims. The oppressors are the humans in general. If they are not obviously evil then Kaladin is likely to feel sympathy for them. Actually, they are likely to be victims of Odium as well. In other words, they were effectively taken over by Odium's spren and forced to fight and then at the end they became slaves to the humans. A pretty miserable existence. It would not be inconceivable for the ex parshmen to want to retaliate more than they have so far (the ones who have been taken over by Odium would almost certainly be doing so). But that would be hard for Kaladin to accept, despite having been in a similar position himself. After all, that would almost certainly mean innocent people dying as well (or at least, those who cannot defend themselves). He shouldn't need any justifications to protect the weak innocent but that would also mean protecting the guilty too (eg slave owners). So one possibility is that the next Oath could involve such a thing - eg can't allow the innocent to die just because there's some guilty people amongst them. Another way this could go is that Kaladin would realise that his own past behaviour in this regard was wrong and that just because a crime was committed against you it doesn't mean you can do whatever you like in response - this could apply to protecting in the sense that it's not right to be overly aggressive in protecting.

On a general note on the Shallan chapters so far, her story arc for the book doesn't seem to have kicked off yet. Dalinar is trying his hand at diplomacy and saving the world. Kaladin is out scouting and fact finding. Shallan so far is more in recovery mode though she is practising her skills at least, but she hasn't really gotten involved with helping Dalinar (though I expect this to change) and the Ghostbloods have been quiet. Adolin is sort-of similar, recovering from his wounds (now done) and while he is officially in charge of a murder investigation the real legwork is being done by others. It might seem somewhat pointless to mention this all in this thread but there's still a lot of plot to go. The plot is also definitely going to intersect with character development (whether romantic or not). Which does lead me to wonder: are we going to end this book with the shipping wars stronger than ever or mostly over? Or maybe a new shipping war? I hope we get something new to discuss at least - waiting for book 4 won't be too much fun if the shipping arguments are mostly unchanged by the end of book 3 (it's already gotten stale). On a general note on Shallan herself, I've said this before but I see her as someone who is quite flexible and adaptable, and someone who can generally get along with most people. So I don't have any fundamental problem with Shallan ending up with someone other than Adolin, and that includes Kaladin. I would say that Shallan and Adolin's relationship looks likely to be naturally low tension with some good natured banter while so far Shallan and Kaladin have been naturally high tension with some rather spiky banter and I would expect that to continue to some degree. Personally, I think Shallan would prefer a more relaxed relationship but we shall see. I know Brandon likes to add tension but he also allows the characters to be themselves - the highstorm was added to the scene in WoR where Shallan and Adolin have a date at a restaurant to add tension and in the recent chapters here the whole sword wielding and Brightness Radiant certainly added a lot of tension (amongst other things) to a scene that started quite low tension. Now for some speculation on Kaladin's side, just for fun. He's obviously not going to be able to develop a relationship with anyone if he's not even there so one of the important points will be how long will it take Kaladin and Shallan to meet again. I'd guess Kaladin will go to Kholinar sometime soon and open the Oathgate and return to Urithiru, which will in turn allow Elhokar to retake the city. I suspect that'll take us until the end of Part 2. So I'd guess if there's going to be anything going on between Shallan and Kaladin it would start in Part 3. But would they even interact much? They operate in rather different fields after all. This is where the plot can come in. The summary blurb says that "Nestled in the mountains high above the storms, in the tower city of Urithiru, Shallan Davar investigates the wonders of the ancient stronghold of the Knights Radiant and unearths dark secrets lurking in its depths". It seems logical that that would be more of an academic exercise, so doesn't seem much room for Kaladin there. But on the other hand, what if Shallan knows things she can't discuss with the others (eg due to the Ghostbloods) and is privately investigating as Veil? Maybe she'll run into Kaladin at such a time and persuades him to help her on a regular basis (probably without revealing her identity). Anybody got any other suggestions? (There's a bit of foreshadowing that Shallan will ask Kaladin to fly her to a nice position to see Urithiru but that would likely be a one time event) The only other thing I can think of is if Adolin is otherwise indisposed and Kaladin is assigned to be a guard for Shallan when they all go visiting other cities. One way in which the plot could potentially not help Kaladin is when Jasnah returns to the action and she teams up with Shallan again with regards to solving academic problems. Basically, if Jasnah is around then I expect Shallan would have less free time. No guarantee this would happen in this book of course - currently, I don't expect Jasnah to have much of a presence until the end but this might be wrong.

With regards to how Shallan will react when she finds out that Adolin killed Sadeas, I remember having some discussions on this earlier in the year. I think it's important to split it into two parts - the initial reaction and the long term effects. While Shallan likes (I would say loves) Adolin, there are some aspects to him she hasn't seen yet. I think there's little doubt that she will be shocked when she finds out - it's not something she would have expected. With the gap between the murder and her finding out increasing, that might make it even more surprising to her - that she hadn't noticed all this time. I would not be surprised if she even feels some form of revulsion initially because of this. However, when she finds out I doubt Shallan would immediately know all the details. The exact circumstances would likely be a mystery (which tends to make things worse). Also, once she gets over the initial shock she would be able to think back about Adolin and Sadeas - remember that he confessed the details of the betrayal at the end of tWoK to Shallan early on in their relationship. Shallan even came up with a plan to neutralise Sadeas. It's not like she's unaware that there's bad blood between these two. Shallan hasn't shown remorse at Sadeas's death and probably agrees with Palona. Even so, Shallan will be forced to re-evaluate Adolin and the circumstances could be quite complex. I think the more she finds out the more she'll realise that she and Adolin are even more alike than she had previously thought. I don't know how long this will take to come out though and she might find it difficult to trust Adolin's side of the story initially - it certainly doesn't help that Shallan has been betrayed by people she liked before. In the end I wouldn't be surprised if she or Renarin or even both can somehow prove what really happened using their Radiant abilities. As part of all this I wouldn't be surprised if she reveals some or all of her deeper secrets to Adolin, which would obviously shock him in return but assuming that they can both accept what they did themselves and what the other did then I would expect their relationship to be long lasting. So, long story short, I expect some sort of "rough patch" in their relationship. How deep and how long I have no real idea but I'm not expecting something extreme. I expect they'll get over it in the end and probably come out stronger. I do have one idea in which Kaladin could actually help: let's say there's some "moments" between Shallan and Kaladin (most likely in the middle of Shallan and Adolin's "rough patch"), though nothing too significant. Doesn't sound like help but if Shallan is able to compare and contrast her feelings for Kaladin and Adolin it might help her realise that there's a big difference and she actually does love Adolin. I could be wrong about this all of course. As long as it's interesting, I don't mind being wrong though.

In my case, if I'm discussing some topic on forums I will often re-read relevant scenes to refresh my memory and to check my that what I'm intending to write matches what's on the page. Sometimes I change my interpretation - there's been a number of times when I started writing a post but then either scrapped it or changes it significantly. It can also be interesting to develop theories and to keep those theories in mind while re-reading particular passages to see if that theory still matches or not. There can be all sorts of interesting little clues when you look carefully. For books in the SA, Brandon is definitely not going to simply lay everything out plainly to the reader because this is a series targeted at serious readers. In other words, it is better to not just look at what is said, but what is not said, how the characters feel, how well their interpretation of things matches other viewpoints and so on. The downside of this is that things are more open to interpretation even when you do read carefully and more complex - it can be hard to determine how relevant each little bit of information is and how trustworthy it is. For example, how normal is Adolin acting in these chapters? We don't see Shallan thinking anything suspicious here (unlike when they saw the second murder scene) but we do see Adolin pacing and tossing a bean-bag into the air, yet Shallan often noted how relaxed he seemed to be in WoR. Also, it's unusual for Adolin to privately visit Shallan and not only that he's brought a number of things for her attention. Across all the chapters in general it's clear that Adolin is on-edge about Sadeas and so on but with Shallan he's also reacting to her new status. How much of the changes we see here are a side-effect of him being on-edge and how much because his perception of Shallan has changed a lot? At the moment, it's really hard to say for certain and I for one would really like to see Adolin's viewpoint of a later visit (I'm sure he'll visit Shallan regularly from now on). Another example: Adolin often downplays his education and intelligence yet we see evidence to the contrary as well. In these latest chapters he invites Shallan to try some men's food. He's never tried to tempt Shallan (or anyone else) into doing such things before that I can remember. Later on, he very nervously invites to train her in sword fighting and specifically references the men's food earlier. In other words, Adolin was worried that Shallan might be offended so tested the waters with something more innocuous first. While his obvious nervousness about broaching the subject gives a different impression, the fact that he planned things out in advance does demonstrate intelligence. Incidentally, one frustration I have with a lot of questions addressed to Brandon is that few deal with these sorts of things. (Not that I dislike more technical discussions, but still...) In the brief bits from Adolin's side so far in OB, there hasn't been much of Shallan. Certainly nothing about his feelings about her. Yep regarding Kaladin. There's definitely hints that he likes her but he's also refusing to consider her that way (for now). Also yep regarding Shallan. She does tend to draw contrasts in her thoughts and words and also makes frequent use of sarcasm, irony etc.... and also tends to adapt to different situations more strongly than perhaps any other character. It can be really tricky for things like this. Casual racism, sexism etc is not something trivial to be ignored but actions also speak louder than words and it's not like there's a culture of political correctness or the like in this world. It's hard to judge what kind of line Brandon is trying to walk here. For example, some people have dinged Shallan for her darkeyed=peasants comment, which is not unreasonable but then again she was likely being sarcastic and exaggerating for effect as well, and I'm pretty sure Adolin was also doing this. In contrast, when Shallan first meets Palona (Sabriel's darkeyed foreign mistress), Shallan quickly realises all that and also that she is effectively the head of household and gives a her polite greeting - and given the fact that Palona remarks on this it could be suspected that most people are not nearly so polite. I don't remember Shallan ever looking down on Palona for being darkeyed. All together, it makes it difficult to be certain what the "real" answer is. btw, one thing about Adolin and Kaladin - don't forget that from his POV, Adolin only just recently found out that Kaladin was a Radiant. He might be a bit grumpy about that, particularly since he was suspicious about Kaladin.

I'm sure I'm not the only one to think that it's Shallan herself who's most likely to get the order wrong. It's probably just as well there was nobody to see this scene: Adolin spends a few hours in Shallan's bedroom and leaves with a spring in his step, while Shallan looks tired and sweaty. Nothing to worry about kids, they were just breaking some deep seated cultural taboos.

Just on the topic of character popularity and so on, here's some old polls (mostly from 2014 and all after WoR came out) Who is your favourite character: http://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/18912-who-is-your-favourite-character-in-sa/ Kaladin wins this one easily. Shallan 5th most popular, Adolin 7th. Who will Shallan end up with: http://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/6519-shallans-relationship/ Very close between Adolin and Kaladin. Who will Kaladin end up with: http://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/7693-kaladins-relationship/ Shallan is the most popular option, though only with 33%. I dunno if there has been significant changes since then. The demographics of the readership can change as well.

He didn't ask for her most precious memory. This is what he asked for: Also: Shallan is more than aware that this isn't real.

I'd been surprised at how some readers see Shallan and Adolin's relationship. So I thought I'd collect some relevant quotes from chapters 13 and 15... A comment on some things we don't see: on Shallan's initial meetings with Adolin, she found him so handsome that it would turn her brain to mush. This faded quite quickly as they got deeper into their relationship and they became more relaxed around each other, and I suspect we won't see this again - though we do still see a strong physical attraction. In these chapters there's also not a single line in Shallan's thoughts of the political or financial benefits that would come from marrying Adolin. We did see those in WoR, particularly early in their relationship but there's none of that so far. Something simple to start with: Shallan and Adolin exchanging some friendly banter... with Shallan including a hint that she'd like to see more of Adolin. Shallan doesn't think of herself as being attractive... but is positively giddy with the thought that Adolin is attracted to her and likes her. Adolin is literally rare and precious to her. You'd think she was a saucy barmaid or something. I wouldn't put it past her to concoct some plan that lets her see more of him. What's the Rosharian equivalent of a French kiss? This is a very "ordinary" scene but it brings Shallan a lot of happiness and she wants more of it. But has also learnt from the mistakes of others (eg her father) about not trying to grab things too strongly. Shallan feels warm and fuzzy knowing that Adolin cares about their relationship. Not specifically romantic but a sign of trust. Similar to the above but more specifically romantic. She's also making it clear to Adolin that she is not at all bothered by his past relationships. I think this is the first time Adolin has initiated a passionate kiss (he has initiated a kiss before but not a passionate one). Shallan's heart skips a beat. I know a lot of people saw this and thought "ugh, that's foreshadowing the exact opposite" but we don't know what's going to happen at this point. Either way, it's still a spoken commitment to each other. This could be a double foreshadowing - that something is going to go wrong but also that they'll try to overcome it. The mere thought that their relationship might not work out is painful to her. Given the quote above it, you could say that Shallan is being foolish. It's also unlike her to worry about such things and perhaps this is a sign that Shallan fears such a thing ever happening. Even being "Radiant" can't suppress the saucy barmaid in Shallan. It's clear that Shallan would prefer to be herself as much as possible during this time. It's extremely painful for her to think of wielding Pattern as a weapon but despite all that, spending this time with Adolin is precious enough for her that she was willing to extend the duration. Putting it another way, with anyone else she would have wanted to end the training sooner rather than later but because it was Adolin she did the exact opposite, despite the pain that came with it from having to wield Pattern as a weapon. In my opinion, Shallan is clearly showing that she is in love with Adolin. She's just not thinking that though. While we don't know the details of Shallan's childhood, she probably hasn't experienced love (either giving or receiving). She had never expected to be able to marry for love either. Maybe this explains why she doesn't diagnose herself as being in love?

Given that Jasnah forgave Shallan for what she did in tWoK it's a reasonable move. Shallan was the only proto-Radiant Jasnah knew about at the time (as far as we know), which is a precious resource for her. She also had hopes for Shallan's abilities in general. Basically, for Jasnah it would be better to have Shallan as a trustworthy ally - and promoting such a thing would obviously help and give Shallan strong reasons to properly support Jasnah long term (since they'd be family). It's also worth pointing out that Navani pushed things forward strongly herself because she wanted someone for Adolin and if it's someone that Jasnah approves of then I'm sure Navani would too. It's quite clear that Jasnah approving of someone almost never happens.

I really don't see this this as being necessary. I also really don't see Adolin or Shallan accepting that.

I'm still waiting for some proper spren to spren interactions (I don't think Syl and the Stormfather really counts).

I want to be open to unexpected future developments but the main reason why I'm pro Shallan x Adolin is that they make a great couple already. I don't want to see that ruined. In short, if it ain't broke don't fix it. That being said, I'd be fine if Shallan and Kaladin end up as friends. However, I'm not sure why they'd have to go through some kind of sort-of-but-not-quite romance for that. I'd also be fine with Shallan teasing Kaladin (I'd be disappointed if she doesn't) though I'm not sure how I'd feel if she genuinely flirted with him for real as herself (if she was Veil at the time I'm not sure how I'd feel).

I suspect it won't happen but for a long time I've had an imagine in my head of Jasnah meeting with her family again and things are mostly rather awkward... and then suddenly Shallan runs in and gives Jasnah a huge hug, breaking the tension.

Maybe this is their idea of an internal memo? I think we should consider this to be the analysis of some wise old beings who know a lot about the history of Roshar and the individuals in question. It doesn't sound like they have Surges now so I would guess that their ability to predict the future magically would be limited.

@Stark I agree that it's likely to be the same 5. It would be interesting to know why the names have changed though - a different Sleepless? A change to reflect their changing status? Something else?

This is the way I see it: At the end of WoR she's angry with Pattern. In the first chapter in OB she's not angry (or only a little bit) but is mostly ignoring him. In the more recent chapters instead of ignoring him she willing invites him to take part in her dinner with Adolin. Still more to go but I see progress. I'd say the way you're characterising why Shallan created Radiant is misleading - she wasn't created "from a place of panic and fear of coping with the truth", she was created to be a calm and pragmatic version of Shallan who could deal with the immediate situation. I think the chapter in question lays it out quite clearly that her only realistic alternatives were to physically run away or to have a complete mental breakdown. But the chapter also explicitly lays out reasons why Shallan would not want to use Radiant that much - Radiant cannot draw (which is Shallan's passion) and while Shallan needs Radiant to wield Pattern as a weapon she would not want to be Radiant while with Adolin otherwise - she wants to be herself as much as possible with Adolin because otherwise that spoils the enjoyment. There's also no obvious need to use Radiant when she's simply by herself - she hasn't needed to thus far. So the main potential usages of Radiant I can see are: training with Adolin, when out in public as herself to keep up a good front, or in combat (if that ever occurs). Veil obviously has limited uses as well. Can you give a specific example of a realistic scenario that would force Shallan to create another persona that isn't covered by her existing ones?

Ah. I apologise. However, when you post about her, it really comes across as "condemnation" rather than "confusion". Certainly Shallan is not easy to understand. All the major characters in this series are complex and can't be taken at face value but Shallan is particularly tricky. I've gone to a lot of effort to try to understand her better but I can't say that I can understand everything that goes through her head or everything she does. I don't think I need to repeat the most painful events in Shallan's life as those are quite obvious for the most part, though overall it is clear that Shallan has suffered greatly and for a large part of her life. Fortunately, she has only suffered mentally but that mental suffering has been extreme. She's also had to deal with that by herself - she received very little help of any kind and actually it was generally her that was helping the others around her. The two events in her past that did help her was Helaran's brief suggestions to her in his one scene - he tells her watch over the others and to be strong for them, to draw safe things, to draw fanciful things, to draw things of brighter days, to not dwell on what happened. That's basically what she does. Wit/Hoid also gives her some advice in the Middlefest chapter but it's rather abstract, though overall you could say that he's suggesting to take a positive approach and to not despair. Despite the vagueness of the help Shallan appreciates it so much that years later Shallan hugs him the moment she meets him. It would probably be reasonable to say that Shallan is very used to solving problems herself but does appreciate useful help from others. Shallan is generally lacking in self-esteem - she knows she's under-educated from a backwater area and she's generally down on herself. Notice how often she uses self-deprecating humour to mock herself. She doesn't value herself that highly and her sense of self-preservation can be weak. Overall, I would say that she is more negative about herself than most people are. I think this is because she blames herself for many of her problems. She also has a strong tendency to not dwell on current problems and takes a more positive view of the future, which probably makes her problems seem smaller than they really are. Putting it another way, it takes a really extreme situation to overcome Shallan's natural ability to deal with things. I would also say that while Shallan doesn't tend to like herself much (though this is improving) she does prefer to like others and for others to like her - she generally doesn't seek conflict, despite her sarcastic tongue, though she will respond to "attacks". It's very rare for her to genuinely dislike someone. She frequently shows sympathy and empathy for others and in most cases the more time she spends with a person the more she'll like them and grow to understand them. During her trip with the slavers to the Shattered Plains she frequently empathised with the slaves and never liked Tvlakv from the start. I would say that the combination motivated her to take the slaves from him - although she told the slaves she needed them, since she never actually shows a need so I would say that this was a lie she told for their benefit. Either way, she tells them they're free to run away if they prefer and also gives them very generous rewards, to the extent that they'll likely be free quite quickly. She could tell that the slaves were uncomfortable with sudden impending freedom so this could be seen as a form of gently rehabilitating them though since we never see her reasons for all this it's quite open to interpretation. So overall, Shallan does not take a typical hero-like attitude, not does she act like a damsel in distress. She should probably be viewed more positively than she herself does and the problems she has overcome or is currently dealing with are probably more difficult than she generally admits to. She is highly creative and curious and has her own personal approach to dealing with things. While her words are not that reliable her emotions generally are. She somewhat reminds me of how Richard Feynman describes himself in "Surely You're Joking Mr Feynman", though he's more of a scientist first and an artist second while Shallan is the other way around. It's been a while since I last read the book though, so I might be remembering wrong.

I hope that some day you'll come to a different understanding of Shallan and be able to enjoy reading her as a character. I'm pretty sure Shallan would have been reluctant. Quoting from WoR (chapter 49, watching the world transform):

The reason I brought up "method acting" is really that I'm looking for a better real world analogy - in my post above I said "I think that what Shallan is doing here is similar to method acting". This is to contrast it with the assertions that it is multiple personality disorder, a split personality or dissociative identity disorder. So my goal was not to use it as a defence directly but as a more accurate description which also allows for more accurate analysis - I'm aware that method acting has potential downsides. Hmm. An interesting suggestion. I feel that what Shallan was doing with Veil in WoR definitely feels like role-playing more than method acting. However, I think she's going more strongly into it now - ie rather than simply changing her appearance, her voice, her attitude, her way of moving/walking she's also changing her emotions/mental state. Temporarily of course.

Picking the Sunmaker is highly speculative but it feels right to me at this point. While there's no guarantee that the in-world book that matches the real book name will all be ancient texts for all 10 books in the SA, that doesn't mean it is likely to be something that hasn't been written yet either. Consider if Jasnah is the author - she wouldn't have been able to write this book yet... and wouldn't be able to by the end of this book either. Which would mean in can't appear in-world. But surely it has to appear in-world, otherwise it would break the pattern and also be rather confusing? Putting it another way, unless Brandon is going in some strange direction then I can only imagine that the in-world Oathbringer book already exists and is available to be read. That would automatically rule out nearly all the options on the poll. Nohadon seems unlikely because it would be confusing to have an in-world book that's unrelated to the sword (which it would have to be because the sword didn't exist in Nohadon's time). So the Sunmarker seems a good bet at this point.

Brandon definitely puts in a lot of effort into these things. In general, he will research the topic, talk to experts and ask them to review and critique the relevant bits that he wrote. He's specifically said this for the first-aid and so on that Kaladin does. He also researched war veterans to convey soldiers properly. He heavily researched atheists for Jasnah. He researched various things for Renarin as well. This is all on the record. So I'm sure he investigated all sorts of things for Shallan. Of course, there is the additional complication of magic as well, which is something we'll have to guess at. We see a specific example of this in that Shallan is no longer able to forget her memory of killing her mother. We also have the in-Cosmere example of Shai being able to do really interesting things to herself. So it's going to be interesting to see where this all goes. I think it would be unusual for Brandon to put in all these development for Shallan's ability to take on different roles and personas... only for it to all be thrown away in the end. ie, it feels like the sort of thing that is going to develop into something larger, more advanced and more dangerous. Assuming that Shallan doesn't fail or die along the way of course. I've felt for a long time that the Lightweavers will be good on the mental side of things (both for themselves and with others) so I think this all fits together. I think the difficulty for the readers is that unlike with the other magic systems we've seen on Roshar it's hard to differentiate between what's suitable and appropriate and what is not, because it's all on the inside.

This is an interesting discussion but it's going a bit off-topic. I think that what Shallan is doing here is similar to method acting. Anyone disagree? (There are known dangers to method acting of course and they seem somewhat similar to some of the concerns people have about what Shallan is doing...)

Shallan and Adolin have known each other for about 50 days at this point. I don't remember the timeline of Wax and Steris very well, but I think it was something like 1-2 years before they became genuinely close.