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Pestis the Spider

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Everything posted by Pestis the Spider

  1. Pestis the Spider
    Thank you, everyone. I am really grateful for all your help. I'll try to solve this situation somehow.
  2. Pestis the Spider
    The Last of Us?
  3. Pestis the Spider
    Seriously, my mental health can't get any worse than it is right now. Or at least I hope so... As for looking for another job: I'm afraid of that. I kinda like this job, and it is well paid compared to similar jobs. Also I don't really have a reason to believe than other place would be any different. I'll start with reporting them. But the thing is that the management really doesn't like when we go straight to HR. Eh, this is hard. I don't want too lose this job. I don't feel capable of finding another one right now, and I desperately need money. Yes, they are not my best friends. I agree. And to be honest it's not every coworker that is mean to me. It's just it looks like it's majority. The thing is that even with the mean coworkers I can actually have a conversation during work. When they're not mean, when they're not teasing, some of them are pretty nice to talk to. And that means a lot to me, because I don't think I would be able to bear working at all if not for the fact that work gives me the possibility to talk to someone. You see, I am a talkative person. I love to talk about the things that interest me. But recently I have became a total recluse, and the only people I still talk to are my coworkers and my therapist/GP (but conversations with them I usually spend crying)*. So what if I report my coworkers, they learn about it (somehow) and then every single one (even the "not-mean" ones) starts to hate me? I would have no one to talk to. I'm afraid of that. I think I will report them. Because today they really took it to far. I am just really scared about what might happen after I report them. *Well, I also talk to my flatmate from time to time, but he's moving out soon, so I need to find a new flatmate. EDIT: Sorry for bothering you with that. I just really had a bad day.
  4. Pestis the Spider
    Theoreticly yes. But the problem is there is a general opinion at my job that the management is useless, so we shouldn't report anything to them. So what if I report it, the management turns out to be actually useless, but my coworkers start to actually hate me, because I report them? The thing is that I am used to bullying. It's not that bad, no one seems to actually hate me. It's just they think I'm funny and constantly make "joking" comments and laugh at me. I learned to live with it. My every school was like that so there is no surprise the job is no different. But sometimes they just go too far, and I can't pretend I'm fine. The word "crazy" really hurts me, because I have been recently diagnosed with some mental issues. Two of them are not curable and should've been diagnosed a long time ago, so now I'm trying to accept them and somehow learn to manage them. And then some bunch of people decides to call me "crazy". It hurts.
  5. Pestis the Spider
    Today at work everyone was having fun calling me crazy. I told them that I am not crazy, maybe just a little weird. And that I think calling me crazy is offensive. But they were just "joking" so it was "fine" (according to them). Then my supervisor walked in. She said "Pestis, less talking, more working", when I was one of the few people working, while everyone else was just standing and doing nothing. Then she said to the new girl, who looked worried. "Don't worry, take your time. I'm only rushing Pestis, because she's kinda slow.". This is a lie and my supervisor knows that. So I replied: "I'm not slow. I'm doing a job of two people, while everyone else is just standing or walking and doing nothing. I could use some help." Supervisor: "Well, ask A, he can help you". "A" is the guy that started all the "crazy" jokes, and refused to help me, because he found it funny. I really don't like the guy and the supervisor knows it Me: "Well, A refused to help me, because he prefers to just stand, laugh and call me crazy. Just like everyone else in here. I am not crazy!" Supervisor: "But you are crazy, everyone knows that." Really? I mean really? I ususally try to laugh with people, when they're making fun of me, because it's easier to take this way. But today just went too far. Even the supervisor joined in. This is horrible.
  6. Pestis the Spider
    But I will still need to talk to them at some point. Avoiding them only makes them more annoying.
  7. Pestis the Spider
    It's Easter. My whole family is trying to call me, and will try tomorrow again. They will ask how I am. I prefer to die than talk to them. Someone save me.
  8. Pestis the Spider
    Well. Homeopathy claims that water has "memory" which is the most hilarious claim I've ever heard, sooo...
  9. Pestis the Spider
    Harry Potter?
  10. Pestis the Spider
    Nah. There are people that think evolution isn't real, that thing that moon isn't real (seriously) and so on. And have you ever heard about homeopathy? That's really hilarious. On the other hand the person I have messaged about rats, just replied to me that they indeed still have rats up for adoption. And female. And all types possible. OMG, I'm dying. I really hoped they would say they have no rats. EDIT: Ok, I decided that this time I'm getting rats (if at all) only from a serious and registered breeder. So I can ignore this person. Sorry I'm rambling again about the rats matter. xD Oh, how I can understand you. My mother does it everytime. However she does it, because when she texts me and I don't reply within half an hour (well, maybe because I don't look at my phone 24/7) she starts to panick that something happened. =.=
  11. Pestis the Spider
    Hm, I just watched tha last episode and I have to say that it ended in much more decent way than I predicted. So maybe I will rewatch this thing, to catch up on episodes I have missed. The thing is that I really liked this series at the beginning, so I decided to read the manga. But manga spoiled me the reveal of World's most predictable murderer ever. SO I dropped the anime, because I really dislike predictability. But I'll rewatch it and then I'll see.
  12. Pestis the Spider
    But my father actually wants a goat to take it for a walk in the park on the leash. Like a dog, but a goat. To be precise he wants a tiny pygmy goat. xD
  13. Pestis the Spider
    Well, I have a garden, and a shed in the garden. It's totally doable. But I think ducks are way more adorable than chickens. Actually my grandfather has three ducks that are trained to do all the dog tricks. Seriously. And my father once wanted a pet duck. Or a pet peacock. Or a pet goat. Or a pet kangaroo. Well... I'm not the only weird one in the family.
  14. Pestis the Spider
    Cats are the best, but they are a really long-term commitment. Since I don't know what I'm going to be doing with my life and where I want to live, they are not good. Most of my interests are like this. That's just how my brain works, can't help it. I probably will be back to normal in a week or two. I mean I will still love rats and all, but I probably won't be so obsessed for long. I actually mostly writie about it, because this sudden need for rats is so ridiculous that I started to find it hilarious. O.o Now I'm thinking about crowfunding a new cage for my rats. But I have no friends so it's not going to work. Oh, god. I need to do something with my life. xD
  15. Pestis the Spider
    Actually I already have 3 rats and I only have 2 hands. O.o And I have females, and rat females by definition are way too hyperactive. It's a pain to catch them all.* xD But I just found every possible registered rat breeder in Scotland and liked their pages on facebook. This way I should have more time to think about it, since the stress of having to find the breeder is solved. So I am not buying any rats now, but who knows what I'll do in the future. *Oh, Pokemon reference. Edit: My flatmate says that I behave like a rat mother instead of a rat owner. That can't be healthy.
  16. Pestis the Spider
    I just messaged the person that is selling rats nearby. That is not good. That is absolutely not good. I think I will have to talk with my therapist about it, because this is really weird. Or maybe my meds for depression are actually working, and just bring back all my lost interests slowly (ETA: That does seems to be probable since I also took out my ps3 recently). I happen to have a big interest in rats (or at least I had before my depression got worse), so maybe the will to buy more rats is just some crazy side-effect of my interest influencing me. Sorry, I think I just got crazy. xD
  17. Pestis the Spider
    Ok, so I made the video of my rats, because photos were really bad (the rats move too fast ). The quality of the video is really low (my phone has really bad camera), but at least something is visible. Also this is the second video I've ever made, so I didn't really do any fancy editing. Please do not repost the links for whatever reason. Rats with creepy music: EDIT: I've deleted the bonus video. Sorry.
  18. Pestis the Spider
    Apparently I am unable to take a good photo. So if one day I manage to take a decent photo of them, then I will post it. It's just they're moving too fast. O.o Also, I don't want any more rats anymore. Looks like I will need another visit to the vet. One of my rats had some infection and it seems to be (finally) cured. But now the other two rats look like they might be getting the same thing. I am annoyed, and my wallet is crying.
  19. Pestis the Spider
    Well, that's why I wanted to be reasonable and buy the second largest cage I found, not the largest one... xD Ok, I won't buy them. I feel better. But I really want to show of my rats. Is there a topic with pet pictures or something?
  20. Pestis the Spider
    But they are so adorable! Omg, this is so hard. I saw that someone is selling really cute baby rats in my city (which doesn't happen often), and it's seriously hard to resist. And they have so many colours to choose from. And they have dumbos with rex coat. O.o They are soooo cute. Ok, ok. I know I shouldn't buy more rats. So I won't buy them. Probably they sold all the females already, either way. Or at least that's what I'm planning to think.
  21. Pestis the Spider
    So, I'm finally going crazy. I actually started to seriously consider spending lots of money on a huge cage for rats and buying three more rats. I already have three. Three is already more than I have hands, so six rats would be absolute madness. Help me, people. O.o
  22. Pestis the Spider
    Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. Yes, it is on Netflix. Yes, it is the best anime EVER.
  23. Pestis the Spider
    No, no, no. Dealing with my grandmothers is an unpleasant chore. Dealing with my personal tutor is an unpleasant chore. Dealing with most of people is unpleasant chore for me. I just am this way, can't fix this. But being forced to deal with my parents is a complete disaster. I can't stand being force to do anything + I can't stand my parents + I don't really like people = disaster. Trust me, my reaction to them is much more negative than you think. They drive me crazy. They are ignorant, hypocritical, illogical, unsupportive, criticizing and overly-controlling. They can't stand the idea that they might be wrong. They can't understand that I do know what I'm doing. They are ridiculous people. And they shout too much.
  24. Pestis the Spider
    But the problem is all the involvement my parents have in my life is paying my rent, talking with me on Skype once a week and forcing me to go back home for 2 weeks during summer and winter holidays. I don't see them more than that, I don't talk to them more than that. The only way I can get them less involved in my life is to stop contacting them all together. Of course thing ares better now than they were when I still lived with my parents. I would never want to go back living with them, not in a million years. But even though I have barely any contact with my parents they still drive me crazy. I don't even know how's that possible.
  25. Pestis the Spider
    Is it better than the second one? Because I loved the first part of the series, but the second one was completely ridiculous.
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