Kobold King

Regular bullets. We can advertise them as the perfect weapon against Gnats! ... I should probably leave the designing to my betters.

I feel it's only fair to warn you that you should have Impact say her name soon, because we're dangerously close to Deathwish just calling her "Pink Panties" in his head.

Give it time. Oh, and just for the public record: Voidus did the math, and it seems like Impact's skirt staying on her body at the speeds she's traveling at may be straining the bounds of credulity a bit. So Moral Guardian has been given a new secondary power that lets him keep the clothes on every Epic within a thousand miles of him.

I still think we need a training montage with Glamour playing "Eye of the Tiger."

It shows that you've written a character that people care about. Even if people only care to see that character die as quickly as possible. I haven't heard any Fall Out Boy, but I'm searching those songs on YouTube now.

* takes note * If more of the world's bosses machine-gunned down tyrannical Epics and treated their employees with respect, the world would be a better place. Actually the world would probably be a better place even with just the second one, but why have just compassion when you can have compassion AND badchullery?

Out of curiosity, how many more people does he need to slice in half before he can earn a spot on the "And Then They Died" list? "Done, and I'll talk to him about it later. I'll need a little more context for that restraining order."

I was actually considering having Arsenal summon himself a truck and come to the clinic in person to orchestrate everything. Thoughts?

Turns out a normal man with normal strength can cut another human being in half, even without factoring in a speed of ninety miles an hour. The things I Google for the sake of literature. Also, Twi? Things are set up for Autumn to give a briefing now. Redlight will be taking notes about the new arrivals' powers.

With Shiny Sparkle gone, Arsenal cast a glower in Autumn's direction. She was standing there looking both bewildered and angry, no doubt because her newest sin had left the building. Nonetheless, at some deep forgotten level she was a professional, and so he waited for her to realize just how badly she'd failed her city. Instead, the woman had the gall to narrow her eyes back at him. "I took her into a command center," she proclaimed furiously. "I radioed you about her powers. She could've blown me up for not giving her what she wanted. And it took kissing her in front of you to make you say enough was enough?" Glass was intense when she wanted to be. Which did nothing to help her position in this case. Arsenal crushed an empty can that had suddenly appeared in his hand. "You're going to blame me, Glass?" he growled softly. "You're one of the city's most trusted operatives, sad as that is. I've seen you scold Epics who could kill you in a heartbeat before. Calamity, you're doing it right now! If you'd glared at her with half the attitude you're giving me right now, you could have put an end to her behavior at any time. So don't try to blame me when clearly you were having the time of your--" His tirade was abruptly cut off by the raging of radio static, followed by a voice coming through the radio. "Weeks to Arsenal. Repeat, Arvin Weeks calling Arsenal. Requesting permission to enter The Dalles airspace in an unidentified transport vehicle. Please respond." Weeks? How long had he been gone for? And he had the nerve to interrupt everything and demand sudden clearance when he didn't even bother to say what kind of vehicle he was using? More radio signals blasted in from other corners of the city. "--to Arsenal. There's a dragon coming in--" Oh Calamity no. Arsenal gripped his radio so tightly he almost broke it, snapping "You're not landing until you explain what the sparks is going on--" "Vondra to Weeks. You have clearance. Make your way to the command center. Over and out." Arsenal frowned, looking up from the radio. Standing in the doorway was the commander of this city, radio in hand and Redlight by his side. "Sir," Arsenal said stiffly, "Weeks'll have to wait. The city's in too much unrest for us to--" "I get the feeling a dragon on our side will a do a lot to quell that unrest," Vondra cut in, in a tone that indicated he'd accept no argument. "Fine," Arsenal growled, not convinced. Eyes darting around the room, he quickly settled on the next order of business that he felt should be brought to the commander's attention. "Glass has violated every security regulation in the--" "I'll hear it from her," Vondra said smoothly, briefly looking over the combat map laid out over the table. His eyes noticeably drifted towards the new ceiling fan of the broken remains of the old one, but he said nothing. "Sir," Arsenal blurted, throwing his hands in the air out of frustration. "I have to be able to report the situation to you--" "I don't want your report right now, Daniel," Vondra said softly. "I want Reader secured, the new arrivals screened, and every hostile Epic either killed or run out of my city. And I want you to orchestrate it all. Understood?" Arsenal stood in helpless frustration for a moment, but finally gave a curt nod. "Understood," he replied stiffly, and then walked out of the room. With the disgruntled chaplain taken care of, Vondra directed his attentions on Autumn Glass. She looked angry. She often looked frustrated when forced to deal with Arsenal, but today she was livid. Her face was red as her hair, and her eyes alone would probably be flashing fire in a dark room. Was it Reader? One of the new Epics? Taking a seat in one of the swiveling chairs Arsenal tended to leave around the base, Vondra locked eyes with the counselor and folded his hands together. "Do you need anything before you brief me on what's been happening? A glass of coke? Another firmly worded letter to Reader?" Taking one final look at the girl's flashing legs as she fell out of view, Deathwish zoomed back into the city intent on finishing the fight with the others. If the others die as quickly as she did, this'll be over before midnight, he thought with a grin. I'll take care of them and hit the bar for a beer... And then he heard screaming. With a puzzled look he turned in mid-air, just in time to see a balding middle-aged man come hurtling through the air towards him. Deathwish turned sharply upwards, accelerating upwards and stopping to get a look at what was going on. By the terrified scream as the man went hurtling back towards the ground, this guy wasn't another Epic. Then who... Rising dramatically into the air was the blonde girl, her shirt splattered with blood but a tight smile on her face. "Can't reflect the damage back to me if it's a person that hits you can you?" In one hand was another terrified guy, whom she also sent careening towards him. Deathwish gave a smile of his own. He'd always wanted to try this. Instead of dodging the body as she'd anticipate, he speeded to ninety miles an hour and swung his sword hard through the screaming projectile. Shock went up his arms and blood splattered across his face. The man continued his arcing flight downwards... now no longer screaming. And also in two separate halves. "Oh dear," Deathwish grinned, wiping some of the blood off his cheek, raising to eye level with the girl. "Look what you made me do. A helpless citizen of The Dalles, killed by my sword in the heat of my frenzy. I hope you realize that there's nothing I can't justify doing to you if I play the 'heartbroken fury' card." He hoped maybe he was overreacting. That maybe she'd understand his goof-up and would shrug it off. Instead, MV stopped dramatically, her face going pale. "Allison," she whispered, tears quivering in her eyes. Oh, now you've done it, Backtrack thought furiously. You've got a date for the first time since kindergarten and you made her cry. He awkwardly stepped up to her and patted her shoulder. "Uh, there there," he assured her. "I didn't mean... look, I'm sure she's perfectly fine... she's a tough girl, just like her sister..." There was the distant sound of a man screaming, and the sound of a loud and squishy crash somewhere nearby. Briefly two figures could be seen zooming overhead, too fast and far away to be made out. "Eep," Backtrack squeaked. "I'm sure Allison's fine, but we need to find her before she gets in the way of fighting Epics. Also, we should probably get going before we get in the way of fighting Epics."

What would it take to prompt her to snap? The flirt alone, or would he have to get touch-y first? I solemnly swear I will not WHOOC it I solemnly swear I will not WHOOC it I solemnly swear I will not WHOOC it....

"So... how about those momentum twins, huh? Pretty hot, right? "Any man who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." "Oh, I've committed adultery with more than my heart. Heh heh." "The adulterer's portion of the second life will be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second death.” "Jeez. Bet you're a lot of fun in bars."

(Deathwish would actually stand a good chance of killing Obliteration, assuming Obliteration tried to disintegrate him like he usually does. ) He wouldn't attend his grandmother's funeral. He'd be at the local bar--not drinking away his sorrows, but hitting on women there and periodically deleting text messages from his family.

"My only regret is not scoring with more women. Hey, wanna be my wingman?"

"Ow! Storm this! If only it were Glass instead of me!"

"Storm you, I was probably gonna score with her eventually! That's it, no more Mr. nice guy." There is literally not a single situation in which Deathwish would utter a non-slontzey phrase.

More Deathwish's style: "Yikes, better catch that guy... wait, that's Greg, the guy who yelled at me for hitting on his fifteen year-old daughter! Bye Greg. Have a nice fall."

I guess her future's up in the air now, huh? That she passed the corruption test with flying colors? ...I'll stop now.

If I'd only given Deathwish a strength secondary, he could slice Impact's 'weapon' in half at a hundred miles per hour. Ah, the road not taken.

I got "Be Prepared" too. Maybe it's just picking up on our sophisticated mannerisms...? The manga creator is having all kinds of unintended consequences. Namely that I'm beginning to have a crush on Doctor Funtimes.

The water jetpack was the spyril! ...I have nothing else to add. I just happened to remember that piece of trivia.

Hope you don't mind me following your lead! As you said, creating older characters is difficult, but here's my best take on Regalia with a couple of tiny Microsoft Paint touches.

I call dibs on High Priest of Ponies.

I will look forward to it. In the meantime, here's another mangafied character: