Good post, I have a few random thoughts.
1. Kaladin - Jezrian is the Windrunner's herald, and he is associated with leadership. Taln references Jezrian teaching leadership, and Kaladin is obviously a crackerjack small unit commander. It remains to be seen how effective he is on a larger scale. I think there is plenty of evidence that his fighting ability is at least somewhat tied to his bond as well (with the references to being able to fight with his eyes closed, feeling as if he is the wind, etc). Combined with epigraph references to the Windrunner's preferring a hierarchy and squads, this seems to point to the Windrunner's being both great soldiers and effective leaders of at least small units. I view the leadership side as more of a tactical one.
2. Dalinar - Don't have much to add here except for the Dalinar vs Kaladin leadership dynamic. If Kaladin's leadership is more on the tactical side, Dalinar's is more on the strategic side. This seems to fit with the Stormfather's command that Dalinar will be a Radiant with no shards, Dalinar's transition from warrior to politician, and the limited number of Bondsmith's (three, right?). Bondsmith's unite disparate factions, are more political leaders (or maybe great generals), where Windrunner's are more the unit commanders. I think part of Dalinar's growth is to rely less on the sword and more on words to lead people.
3. Shallan - I pretty much agree with you. One of the WoR epigraphs mentions the Lightweavers doing something that inspires the KR to pursue a second assault, despite being apparently defeated once. I think in addition to the Memory part, there is also an element of being able to inspire/transform people (psychology, basically, or lies and truth in the right combinations).