The Happy Inquisitor: A Restaurant

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Thaidakar thought about where to continue his story. story telling was an art praised by many, but also hated by the same amount. you had to get it just right, in Thaidakar's mind there were several precepts or laws to it, 1. stick to your own rules, 2. make the characters relatable, 3. tiny spots of detail are important so make them as good as possible, 4. a nice combination of well known genres in a way the audience hasn't seen before is best. there were of course more, but Thaidakar prized the four as the top ones.

Thaidakar took another drink, he rolled around something important in his mind. he needed to make sure the shadow brigade never found him, not again, not never.

[Lunamor she/her]

54 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar shrugged, "okay." Thaidakar then turned to Lunamor, "shall I continue my story?"

@Lunamor

Lunamor grinned. He was tempted to snatch Thaidakar’s drink away from him so he would talk without interruptions. 

“Please continue the saga of the tiny man.”

Lunamor had grown very attached to Wallin.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

3 minutes ago, Lunamor said:

Lunamor grinned. He was tempted to snatch Thaidakar’s drink away from him so he would talk without interruptions. 

“Please continue the saga of the tiny man.”

Lunamor had grown very attached to Wallin.

Thaidakar smiled wryly, "I shall continue the saga then. Wallin was confused, the trolls were standing right in front of him, bad smells and all. the leader was staring right at him! but couldn't see him. Wallin looked at the sword, had it done it? did it make him invisible? only time could tell. Wallin looked around. the trolls had wandered back to their fire and resumed plotting what to do to Wallin's family. Wallin grinned as a plan came to him." Thaidakar took a drink and said, "what happened next is quite hilarious, so hilarious I might need another drink to tell it. but this time some sapphire wine."

Edited April 6, 2022 by Thaidakar the Ghostblood

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

“That costs,” Zeoy said. “But okay.” She went back to the wall of bottles. 

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

2 minutes ago, Zephrun's Imperium said:

“That costs,” Zeoy said. “But okay.” She went back to the wall of bottles. 

Thaidakar nodded his thanks, "I can pay. you take spheres, boxings, or another currency?"

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

“Spheres, please.” She poured the wine into a glass.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Just now, Zephrun's Imperium said:

“Spheres, please.” She poured the wine into a glass.

Thaidakar smiled, he pulled five chips out of his pocket and placed it on the table, "is this enough?"

[Zephrun’s Imperium they/he]

She nodded, pocketing the change with a wink. “Thank ya.”

[Lunamor she/her]

Lunamor shot a pointed look over at Zeoy. Spheres were not a preferred currency in his establishment. But Thaidakar had offered them up first and was already telling a story, so he’d let it slide this time.

”This joke, he is funny? I must hear him!”

@Zephrun's Imperium

@Thaidakar the Ghostblood

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Thaidakar nodded, "it is funny. now, where was I?" Thaidakar said this with mock confusion, "ah that's right, Wallin had just decided what to do. now the trolls were talking loudly, one of them was going about on a supposed adventure he had had saying, 'oi swar it twas real! really it twash!' to which the leader replied, 'I doubt dat! you've 'ived wit us for as long as I can remember, and oim older tharn you!'. while they were talking Wallin crept up, holding the sword. he whispered in an imitation of the tall tale telling troll, 'at least I haven't fallen into a mush poodle like yau didses!' the leader was very angry, he walked over to the tale telling troll and slapped him around the face, 'that's not twue! Oi have never!' Wallin snickered quietly and walked over to one of the other trolls, 'oi heard tha' our cap'n here plans to get rid of all o' us when we fry the 'umans up!' soon the trolls were brawling all over, flattening the fire and their seats, and nearly mashing Wallin to bits."

@Lunamor

Edited April 6, 2022 by Thaidakar the Ghostblood

[Lunamor she/her]

8 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar nodded, "it is funny. now, where was I?" Thaidakar said this with mock confusion, "ah that's right, Wallin had just decided what to do. now the trolls were talking loudly, one of them was going about on a supposed adventure he had had saying, 'oi swar it twas real! really it twash!' to which the leader replied, 'I doubt dat! you've 'ived wit us for as long as I can remember, and oim older tharn you!'. while they were talking Wallin crept up, holding the sword. he whispered in an imitation of the tall tale telling troll, 'at least I haven't fallen into a mush poodle like yau didses!' the leader was very angry, he walked over to the tale telling troll and slapped him around the face, 'that's not twue! Oi have never!' Wallin snickered quietly and walked over to one of the other trolls, 'oi heard tha' our cap'n here plans to get rid of all o' us when we fry the 'umans up!' soon the trolls were brawling all over, flattening the fire and their seats, and nearly mashing Wallin to bits."

@Lunamor

Lunamor let out a bellowing laugh.

”Their accents, they are ridiculous!”

He seemed to find that funnier than the banter. Making fun of lowlander dialects was one of his favorite pass times.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Just now, Lunamor said:

Lunamor let out a bellowing laugh.

”Their accents, they are ridiculous!”

He seemed to find that funnier than the banter. Making fun of lowlander dialects was one of his favorite pass times.

Thaidakar smiled, he took a drink of his wine and sighed, "that was the point. now Wallin's family was made up of twenty people including Wallin himself. so it was nineteen of them tied up to a tree in the corner, watching with confusion and frightened faces. Wallin snuck over while the trolls were fighting and used the sword to cut the rope. his older brother thanked him quietly and Wallin muttered 'your welcome'. They nearly escaped then, but the leader of the trolls just noticed Wallin's niece accidentally stepping on a carrot one of the trolls had left. The trolls scrambled after Wallin's family. thus the chase began." Thaidakar took another drink and asked, "by the way, when is the soup going to be ready?"

[Lunamor she/her]

33 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar smiled, he took a drink of his wine and sighed, "that was the point. now Wallin's family was made up of twenty people including Wallin himself. so it was nineteen of them tied up to a tree in the corner, watching with confusion and frightened faces. Wallin snuck over while the trolls were fighting and used the sword to cut the rope. his older brother thanked him quietly and Wallin muttered 'your welcome'. They nearly escaped then, but the leader of the trolls just noticed Wallin's niece accidentally stepping on a carrot one of the trolls had left. The trolls scrambled after Wallin's family. thus the chase began." Thaidakar took another drink and asked, "by the way, when is the soup going to be ready?"

“The soup will be ready when your story is finished. I can cook quickly.”

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Just now, Lunamor said:

“The soup will be ready when your story is finished. I can cook quickly.”

Thaidakar nodded, he took a drink, "that's fine. now Wallin's family rushed as fast as they could, but even though most of them were fast runners Wallin was not. though they had a head start the trolls caught up with them! a battle ensued. Wallin had brought his family's weapons with him. he handed them out and the family fought with the trolls. Wallin drew his sword and turned invisible. Wallin hid behind a bush. meanwhile Wallin's older brother Roland-" Thaidakar took a sip and wiped his mouth, "Roland battled against the leader troll with his and Wallin's uncle Marc. Roland fought like a demon and Marc like a- 

Thaidakar tapped the table while he thought of something, "like a Bridgman deprived of soup. but it was not enough. the troll cracked Marc's head open, the gore spilling everywhere. most of the other trolls were dead or had fled, but Roland was dying. the other members of the family were not paying attention to him as they were dealing with the remnants of the other trolls. only Wallin could do something, but Wallin was small, no. he couldn't save anyone! a small voice in his head said kindly, 'you untied them, you gave them their weapons, and you distracted the trolls.' But Wallin wasn't sure now, it had just been the sword helping him then." 

[Lunamor she/her]

8 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar nodded, he took a drink, "that's fine. now Wallin's family rushed as fast as they could, but even though most of them were fast runners Wallin was not. though they had a head start the trolls caught up with them! a battle ensued. Wallin had brought his family's weapons with him. he handed them out and the family fought with the trolls. Wallin drew his sword and turned invisible. Wallin hid behind a bush. meanwhile Wallin's older brother Roland-" Thaidakar took a sip and wiped his mouth, "Roland battled against the leader troll with his and Wallin's uncle Marc. Roland fought like a demon and Marc like a- 

Thaidakar tapped the table while he thought of something, "like a Bridgman deprived of soup. but it was not enough. the troll cracked Marc's head open, the gore spilling everywhere. most of the other trolls were dead or had fled, but Roland was dying. the other members of the family were not paying attention to him as they were dealing with the remnants of the other trolls. only Wallin could do something, but Wallin was small, no. he couldn't save anyone! a small voice in his head said kindly, 'you untied them, you gave them their weapons, and you distracted the trolls.' But Wallin wasn't sure now, it had just been the sword helping him then." 

Lunamor frowned.

”This story, he is depressing.”

He paused, considering something.

“Wallin, he should be very muscular, yes? He carried 20 swords for a long distance. He is a strong man. Tiny, but strong. Maybe it could help him fight?”

Lunamor knew that he was making connections that were perhaps not actually in the story, grasping at fleeing motes of dust. But he felt bad for the tiny man. He knew how it felt to watch your friends die.

Quote

Yeesh I got serious. But you started it 

 

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

2 minutes ago, Lunamor said:

Lunamor frowned.

”This story, he is depressing.”

He paused, considering something.

“Wallin, he should be very muscular, yes? He carried 20 swords for a long distance. He is a strong man. Tiny, but strong. Maybe it could help him fight?”

Lunamor knew that he was making connections that were perhaps not actually in the story, grasping at fleeing motes of dust. But he felt bad for the tiny man. He knew how it felt to watch your friends die.

 

Quote

lol

Thaidakar shrugged, "he made his mule do it. the mule was tied up to a tree in the corner. anyhow, But Wallin couldn't do nothing, he had to go and help even if he knew he wasn't strong, wasn't brave, wasn't good enough. Wallin drew his sword and attacked." Thaidakar smiled, "that morning Wallin awoke. he lay in his bed at his house. above him was his poster of Ken Griffey junior from the future. Wallin started to sit up but then stopped, he felt a pain in his side. he rubbed it. suddenly a voice said, 'he's awake!' suddenly eighteen people crowded in the room, all sporting various injuries. Wallin's older brother was at the head of them, 'WALLIN! you're awake! you're a hero!' Wallin scratched his head, he was a hero? last he remembered he had decided to go and help, 'what happened?' Wallin asked. Wallin's brother smiled, 'you don't remember? well I guess that's possible considering the hit you received in the head. well what happened is...'" 

Thaidakar paused, he took a drink and said, "Wallin's brother told Wallin what had happened, apparently Wallin had stabbed the troll in the gut right before it could kill Wallin's brother. Wallin had then sliced the troll's head off. but in one last fell swing the troll had dragged his club onto Wallin's head. it was a miracle that he was alive." Thaidakar smiled, "but there is more to the story."

[Lunamor she/her]

44 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar shrugged, "he made his mule do it. the mule was tied up to a tree in the corner. anyhow, But Wallin couldn't do nothing, he had to go and help even if he knew he wasn't strong, wasn't brave, wasn't good enough. Wallin drew his sword and attacked." Thaidakar smiled, "that morning Wallin awoke. he lay in his bed at his house. above him was his poster of Ken Griffey junior from the future. Wallin started to sit up but then stopped, he felt a pain in his side. he rubbed it. suddenly a voice said, 'he's awake!' suddenly eighteen people crowded in the room, all sporting various injuries. Wallin's older brother was at the head of them, 'WALLIN! you're awake! you're a hero!' Wallin scratched his head, he was a hero? last he remembered he had decided to go and help, 'what happened?' Wallin asked. Wallin's brother smiled, 'you don't remember? well I guess that's possible considering the hit you received in the head. well what happened is...'" 

Thaidakar paused, he took a drink and said, "Wallin's brother told Wallin what had happened, apparently Wallin had stabbed the troll in the gut right before it could kill Wallin's brother. Wallin had then sliced the troll's head off. but in one last fell swing the troll had dragged his club onto Wallin's head. it was a miracle that he was alive." Thaidakar smiled, "but there is more to the story."

Internally Lunamor breathed sigh of relief. Externally, he raised an eyebrow.

”More?”

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

1 hour ago, Lunamor said:

Internally Lunamor breathed sigh of relief. Externally, he raised an eyebrow.

”More?”

Thaidakar smiled, "we'll call this the epilogue. So weeks and weeks later a wizard came into town. he gave gifts to the family, they had a big feast. afterwards when they had all lit their pipes and were exhausted Wallin came to the wizard and showed him the sword. the wizard shrugged and said, 'nothing special about it, just an ordinary short sword.' to which Wallin replied, 'but it made me invisible! how can that be?'. the wizard smiled, 'I think the magic one here is you Wallin. you are a wizard!' Wallin widened his eyes. Wallin and the wizard arranged an agreement. Wallin would go with the wizard to train. That night Wallin lay in bed, thinking about all that had transpired. he rolled around his thoughts, did he really want to be a wizard? now, this question was not answered at once, it needed another long adventure to decide. and now we come to an end at the beginning, for Wallin's adventures had just begun." Thaidakar finished off his wine and said, "that is only one of the tales in the Adventures of Wallin saga, of which my master told me all the tales. I am a troubadour, a troubadour of the cosmere. Hoid himself envies me, for I happen to have more tales than he."

[Lunamor she/her]

39 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar smiled, "we'll call this the epilogue. So weeks and weeks later a wizard came into town. he gave gifts to the family, they had a big feast. afterwards when they had all lit their pipes and were exhausted Wallin came to the wizard and showed him the sword. the wizard shrugged and said, 'nothing special about it, just an ordinary short sword.' to which Wallin replied, 'but it made me invisible! how can that be?'. the wizard smiled, 'I think the magic one here is you Wallin. you are a wizard!' Wallin widened his eyes. Wallin and the wizard arranged an agreement. Wallin would go with the wizard to train. That night Wallin lay in bed, thinking about all that had transpired. he rolled around his thoughts, did he really want to be a wizard? now, this question was not answered at once, it needed another long adventure to decide. and now we come to an end at the beginning, for Wallin's adventures had just begun." Thaidakar finished off his wine and said, "that is only one of the tales in the Adventures of Wallin saga, of which my master told me all the tales. I am a troubadour, a troubadour of the cosmere. Hoid himself envies me, for I happen to have more tales than he."

Lunamor gave him a golf clap.

”This story, he is fantastic! Tiny man, he is so familiar… he reminds me of my friend, Wilbo. Does Wallin have an affinity for food? Wilbo, he always appreciates my stew.”

Quote

The two stories are suspiciously similar 

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Just now, Lunamor said:

Lunamor gave him a golf clap.

”This story, he is fantastic! Tiny man, he is so familiar… he reminds me of my friend, Wilbo. Does Wallin have an affinity for food? Wilbo, he always appreciates my stew.”

Thaidakar blinked, "no, Wallin and Wilbo are two different people. Wilbo is his great-uncle."

Quote

yeah, they are. I kind of did it on purpose I guess, maybe. though I mashed it together with Harry Potter at the end.

 

[Lunamor she/her]

49 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar blinked, "no, Wallin and Wilbo are two different people. Wilbo is his great-uncle."

Lunamor rapidly pushed his barstool back and stood up.

”Thank you for your payment. You wanted cookie and Chouta soup, yes? I will go make some.”

He then promptly strode off and into the kitchen without waiting for a response. The sizzling of oil, banging of pots, and faint Horneater cursing could be heard as he began to prepare the stew. The ‘meat’ used for making Chouta was still very strange. It had crunchy things, but not like the shells from back home.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Just now, Lunamor said:

Lunamor rapidly pushed his barstool back and stood up.

”Thank you for your payment. You wanted cookie and Chouta soup, yes? I will go make some.”

He then promptly strode off and into the kitchen without waiting for a response. The sizzling of oil, banging of pots, and faint Horneater cursing could be heard as he began to prepare the stew. The ‘meat’ used for making Chouta was still very strange. It had crunchy things, but not like the shells from back home.

Thaidakar nodded and sipped the remnants of his wine.

[Lunamor she/her]

3 hours ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar nodded and sipped the remnants of his wine.

Lunamor eventually bustled out of the kitchen and back to the bar, balancing two large bowls of stew. Well, more pots than bowls. He tended to forget that most people weren’t seven feet tall, so the difference was negligible to him. 

“Here is your stew. He is very hot, do not burn your tongue. I can’t have you being unable to taste it!”

He dropped the pots on the table with a thud, the contents barely keeping from sloshing out. The cookie stew seemed to contain raw batter and chocolate chunks, but more liquidy, somehow. The Chouta stew had not only fried meat, but fried broth as well. Lunamor was particularly proud of that invention.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

7 hours ago, Lunamor said:

Lunamor eventually bustled out of the kitchen and back to the bar, balancing two large bowls of stew. Well, more pots than bowls. He tended to forget that most people weren’t seven feet tall, so the difference was negligible to him. 

“Here is your stew. He is very hot, do not burn your tongue. I can’t have you being unable to taste it!”

He dropped the pots on the table with a thud, the contents barely keeping from sloshing out. The cookie stew seemed to contain raw batter and chocolate chunks, but more liquidy, somehow. The Chouta stew had not only fried meat, but fried broth as well. Lunamor was particularly proud of that invention.

Thaidakar smiled deeply, "good thing I'm super hungry, TIME TO DEVOUR!" and with that Thaidakar began eating at frightening speeds..

[Lunamor she/her]

34 minutes ago, Thaidakar the Ghostblood said:

Thaidakar smiled deeply, "good thing I'm super hungry, TIME TO DEVOUR!" and with that Thaidakar began eating at frightening speeds..

Lunamor shook his head, smiling slightly. He moved to retreat back into the kitchen, but then halted to point at Zeoy and Radiant. 

“You. Do not let customers die.”

He then resumed his journey into the back of the restaurant.

@Zephrun's Imperium

@DramaQueen