Short Story Intro to the World of Mistborn

[Zath he/him]

This is a short story that I wrote as an introduction to Allomancy and the Final Empire for the Mistborn Adventure Game.  It's targeted towards people who have never read the books, so I tried to explain the setting and magic system in a way that would make some sense to a newcomer.  Of course, those explanations are limited to in-world knowledge of how everything works, so there are a few... MacGuffins, or red herrings, or whatever you want to call it.   I'd appreciate any feedback you have for me, and I hope you enjoy it!  (It's about 17 pages long and 8,500 words, give or take). 
Fair warning: if this were a film, it would be rated PG-13 for violence  (about the same level of violence as the novels, in my opinion).  There's no sexual content or vulgarity or anything like that.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VfcKTEw6Ti8shv_-KJEWzMHHnYbrHB7jUVgCeBaZh78/edit?usp=sharing

[Kaj he/him]

This looks great. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

[kuiinteth of isaana he/him]

old thread, but this is actually pretty well written

 

[Zath he/him]

Thanks, Kaj and kuiinteth!  I'm glad you liked it.