Faceless Mist-Wraith he/him Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 It’s a fairly simple question. If the world was to end because of carnivorous herbivores, which would you choose? Man-eating Rabbits are genetically engineered creatures that crave human flesh, though they can eat other animals. They hunt in packs, have incredible hearing, and breed quickly. Zombie Cows are the result of an offshoot of mad cow disease. Humans can be infected by a cow’s bite, but the resulting zombie will decompose fairly quickly. Zombie cows move at a trot unless they see food. They tend to travel in herds, and with zombie cows come zombie bulls, which move faster. So which would you choose: The Hare-bringers of Doom or The Undead Herd? 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Honor Spren she/her Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Rabbits, because they can be slain by a holy hand grenade. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaymyth she/her Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Bunnies! I prefer adorable apocalypses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Cows sound more lazy and less terrifying. Btw I caught up on the rest of general discussion before coming here because I assumed it was an offshoot thread......nope! Did give me a good giggle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King he/him Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Zombie cows ought to be easier to see coming and escape from than the billions of man-eating rabbits that will soon be in existence, but I am surrounded by cattle ranches on all sides. Sorry world. I'm selling you out for my own safety. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Delightful Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Just now, Kobold King said: Zombie cows ought to be easier to see coming and escape from than the billions of man-eating rabbits that will soon be in existence, but I am surrounded by cattle ranches on all sides. Sorry world. I'm selling you out for my own safety. A wild kobold king has appeared! kobold king uses sell-out. Its super effective! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zathoth Posted January 3, 2017 Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 Cows, bigger target, easier to hit, hopefully easier to run away from. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faceless Mist-Wraith he/him Posted January 3, 2017 Author Report Share Posted January 3, 2017 24 minutes ago, Kobold King said: Zombie cows ought to be easier to see coming and escape from than the billions of man-eating rabbits that will soon be in existence, but I am surrounded by cattle ranches on all sides. Sorry world. I'm selling you out for my own safety. When you consider the fact that infected beef would likely end up in grocery stores and fast-food chains, resulting in a huge zombie epidemic, it doesn't seem like that bad of a trade-off. At least you'll probably be able to see the rabbit herd coming. Whether you'll be able to outrun it is another matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 Rabbits. Man-eating or not, they can be taken down with a much smaller caliber of bullet (or a rock from the slingshot of a practiced sportsperson) than a zombie cow. Not BB gun-small or airsoft gun-small (unless you're talking the really powerful ones). They could perhaps even be baited with poisoned meat (non-human meat, I'm not a sicko) because, man-eating or not, rabbits usually aren't that bright. Point is, there are more things capable of killing a man-eating rabbit, and those things are more widely available. As has been pointed out before, zombie cows would make for bigger and slower targets, but who knows how much of their meat would wind up in stores before world governments realized that—hey, wait a second, these cows are storming zombies? 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Slowswift he/him Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 @TwiLyghtSansSparkles What about zombie caribou, though? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 10 minutes ago, Slowswift said: @TwiLyghtSansSparkles What about zombie caribou, though? A hyper-controlling weather Epic will save us, so long as we swear fealty beforehand. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faceless Mist-Wraith he/him Posted January 4, 2017 Author Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 27 minutes ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: A hyper-controlling weather Epic will save us, so long as we swear fealty beforehand. Let's just hope they aren't scared of rabbits*. That would be terribly inconvenient. *Leporiphobia for anyone that's interested. 1 hour ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: Rabbits. Man-eating or not, they can be taken down with a much smaller caliber of bullet (or a rock from the slingshot of a practiced sportsperson) than a zombie cow. Not BB gun-small or airsoft gun-small (unless you're talking the really powerful ones). They could perhaps even be baited with poisoned meat (non-human meat, I'm not a sicko) because, man-eating or not, rabbits usually aren't that bright. I've always thought about this when people say they would rather have zombie cows because of their lack of speed. I don't know much about a cow's durability, (or a caribou's for that matter) but I can't imagine that a herd undead bovines would be easy to stop. However, because I feel compelled to play both sides, if man-eating rabbits were unable to reach their primary prey, they would likely adapt by eating local wildlife. Since they would multiply at an incredible rate, they would be the ultimate invasive species, potentially wreaking havoc with the world's ecosystem. Plus, odds are some eccentric person would try to keep a few as pets, enabling them to spread to different continents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 24 minutes ago, Faceless Mist-Wraith said: Let's just hope they aren't scared of rabbits*. That would be terribly inconvenient. *Leporiphobia for anyone that's interested. I've always thought about this when people say they would rather have zombie cows because of their lack of speed. I don't know much about a cow's durability, (or a caribou's for that matter) but I can't imagine that a herd undead bovines would be easy to stop. However, because I feel compelled to play both sides, if man-eating rabbits were unable to reach their primary prey, they would likely adapt by eating local wildlife. Since they would multiply at an incredible rate, they would be the ultimate invasive species, potentially wreaking havoc with the world's ecosystem. Plus, odds are some eccentric person would try to keep a few as pets, enabling them to spread to different continents. She isn't. Not by far. That's a good point. However, I'd add that they have the following disadvantages: 1) Their horrific appetites and taste for human flesh would make them a highly visible threat from the beginning. If a handful of cute little rabbits stripped a farmer to the bone in seconds flat, that crem would be on the news instantly. It would go viral. Everyone would know about the fluffy little piranha making their way across America's breadbasket (or wherever they happened to start out) by the end of their first day out, and they would prepare quickly. Knowledge of these fearsome critters would spread rapidly, and their rapid multiplication rates would give local and national governments a sense of urgency in stopping this invasive species. 2) As rabbits, they are highly vulnerable to lots of things. I've already covered their weaknesses to bullets, poison, and rocks thrown at high speeds; but they can also be trapped. Their appetites could prove to be their undoing, as, deprived of their choice prey, they resorted to chowing down on some lovely little meat cubes left out and—whoops. There they go. Trapped, dead, or dead and trapped. 3) With their high visibility and behavior being common knowledge, if an eccentric who kept a few man-eating rabbits as pets tried to take them overseas, it's likely they would be stopped and perhaps arrested at customs. Say what you will about the TSA, but if they won't let you keep your 4.5 ounce bottle of hand sanitizer, there is no way you're getting on that plane with a man-eating rabbit. And, if by some miracle you do get those hares on a plane, Samuel L. Jackson will be nearby and ready to film an unexpected sequel to one of his films. None of this is to say that these rabbits could be kept from causing damage, because they would definitely cause damage. Potentially a lot of it. Some of that damage might be beyond immediate repair. However, these critters would be enough of a visible threat that governments and citizens would mobilize quickly and decisively, keeping them from doing their absolute worst. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faceless Mist-Wraith he/him Posted January 4, 2017 Author Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 14 minutes ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: 3) With their high visibility and behavior being common knowledge, if an eccentric who kept a few man-eating rabbits as pets tried to take them overseas, it's likely they would be stopped and perhaps arrested at customs. Say what you will about the TSA, but if they won't let you keep your 4.5 ounce bottle of hand sanitizer, there is no way you're getting on that plane with a man-eating rabbit That is very likely. The governments around the world would also likely implement measures to ensure no-one snuck one onto a plane. I was making the assumption that the kind of people who are eccentric enough to own man-eating pets would either use private planes or some kind of blackmarket. It seems like something someone would be foolish enough to do. Though it does start to reach horror-movie level of intelligence when you think about it. 17 minutes ago, TwiLyghtSansSparkles said: And, if by some miracle you do get those hares on a plane, Samuel L. Jackson will be nearby and ready to film an unexpected sequel to one of his films. Thank you for that mental image. Here's an upvote and an accompanying image. Spoiler 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Assassin in Burgundy he/him Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 Seeing a real-life Rabbit of Caerbannog has always been my childhood dream, so rabbits. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Exalted Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 "Did I tell you? Did you listen to me? Oh no, no, you knew better didn't you? No, it's just an ordinary rabbit, isn't it. The names you called me. Well, don't say I didn't tell you." -Tim the Enchanter 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Assassin in Burgundy he/him Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 "And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that, with it, Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits in Thy mercy."And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--" "Skip a bit, brother." 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Exalted Posted January 4, 2017 Report Share Posted January 4, 2017 2 minutes ago, Assassin in Burgundy said: "And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that, with it, Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits in Thy mercy."And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--" "Skip a bit, brother." Unfortunately, as far as I know there's only one holy hand grenade, so we'd somehow have to gather all the rabbits in one spot before setting it off. (And make sure that King Arthur's not the one pulling the pin, but that's kind of a given.) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erunion he/him Posted January 5, 2017 Report Share Posted January 5, 2017 I'm sorry. The fact that this hasn't been linked here yet is unacceptable. Therefore, The DREAD RABBIT OF CAERBANNAGH (For the record, I voted bunnies) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbird she/her Posted January 5, 2017 Report Share Posted January 5, 2017 18 minutes ago, Erunion said: I'm sorry. The fact that this hasn't been linked here yet is unacceptable. Therefore, The DREAD RABBIT OF CAERBANNAGH (For the record, I voted bunnies) It may not have been linked yet, but it's definitely been referenced multiple times. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erunion he/him Posted January 5, 2017 Report Share Posted January 5, 2017 @Sunbird - I noticed, but as many younglings may not have gotten the reference, the link is provided. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbird she/her Posted January 5, 2017 Report Share Posted January 5, 2017 Just now, Erunion said: @Sunbird - I noticed, but as many younglings may not have gotten the reference, the link is provided. Good idea. Monty Python is essential pop culture knowledge. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faceless Mist-Wraith he/him Posted January 18, 2017 Author Report Share Posted January 18, 2017 It's funny, because the reference wasn't intentional. I just randomly came up with the question. The current results are pretty interesting, because in almost every other group zombie cows have always been the majority. Must be the abundance of Monty Python references. *At the time of this post: Man-eating Rabbits-11 Zombie Cows-2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sparkrunner he/him Posted November 2, 2017 Report Share Posted November 2, 2017 I'm doing a lot of Necromancy, but it is around Halloween. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darkness Ascendant he/him Posted November 3, 2017 Report Share Posted November 3, 2017 16 hours ago, Roadwalker said: I'm doing a lot of Necromancy, but it is around Halloween. Get out. Halloween ended 3 days ago fool. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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