Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Posted (edited)

Hah, tin foil does nothing. Now this trusty aluminum foil hat...

Could you just eat this cookie? No, it doesnt have side effects*.

 

 

 

 

*See disclaimer.

Edited by 18th Shard
Posted

sure i'll take a cookie. 

Disclaimer: Disclaimers follow. (Neither the seller not the manufacturer will be liable for any brain damage arising from the use of this product. Void where prohibited except where not prohibited. Above terms subject to change without notice. Action figures sold separately. Actual price set by retailers. All research statistics are blatantly flagrant. All rights reserved. All sales final. Any other application constitutes fraud. At participating locations only. Alternate toy available for children under 3. Because some jurisdictions do not allow the exclusion or limitation of liability for consequential or incidental damages, the above limitations may not apply to you. By continuing to use this system you indicate your awareness of and consent to these terms and conditions of use. Caveat emptor. Do not look at laser beam with remaining eye. Your results may vary. Disclaimer does not cover misuse, accident, lightning, flood, tornado, tsunami, volcanic eruption, earthquake, hurricanes and other Acts of a Shard, neglect, damage from improper or unauthorized repair, incorrect line voltage, broken antenna or marred cabinet, missing or altered serial numbers, electromagnetic radiation from nuclear blasts, sonic boom vibrations, customer adjustments that are not covered in this joke list, and incidents owing to airplane crash, ship sinking, motor vehicle accidents, dropping the item, falling rocks, leaky roof, broken glass, mud slides, forest fire, or projectile (which can include, but not be limited to, arrows, bullets, shot, BB's, shrapnel, lasers, napalm, torpedoes, or emissions of X-rays, Alpha, Beta and Gamma rays, knives, sticks and stones, et al.). User assumes full liabilities. Some humor and satire included. Price and participation may vary. Not to be used for the other use. Words crossed out are to be disregarded unless they resemble spikes piercing words, in which case you should probably see your local spike cookie vendor. May be addictive. Must be 18 months or older to order. Prices subject to change without notice. No refunds available. There is a slight chance (between 12-87%) of Ruinous corruption; this may or may not cause the following side effects (including, but not limited to): delusions of grandeur, hallucinations, compulsive and destructive behavior, pain, headaches, voices in your head, pneumonia, heart attack, stoke, severe internal bleeding, and death. These side effects are not permanent and are perfectly normal. Please see your cookie vendor to see if Hemalurgy is right for you. No kandra were harmed in the making of this product. Some disclaimers may not apply to all participating victims participants. All constitutional rights are waved by use of this product. Irreparable damage may occur. Vendor is not liable for damaged packaging, bodies, or souls. There is always another secret. Surgeon's Warning: Spiking causes severe Investiture warping. Fragile. This side up. If normality persists for a period of time exceeding 30 days, consult with a Dark Alley representative near you. This may be a sign of chronic dementia. This side down. The information contained in this disclaimer is intended by the Dark Alley for the use of consumers only and may contain information that is privileged, confidential, and/or protected from disclosure by inapplicable laws. Contents of this disclaimer are under pressure. This disclaimer may be in part, whole, or wholesale plagiarized. Shake well before using. Batteries not included. Each set sold separately. Avoid prolonged exposure to this disclaimer. Do not read this disclaimer while driving a vehicle or operating heavy equipment. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is coincidental and intended by the author. Reading this disclaimer does not provide grounds for a legal dispute. Parental guidance suggested. Professional driver on a closed course. Do not attempt at home. See the owner's manual for more information.Trespassers will be spiked.˙ʍolloɟ llᴉʍ ʇxǝʇ pǝʇɹǝʌuᴉ ǝɹoW ˙ʎɔuǝᴉɔᴉɟɟǝ ƃuᴉpɐǝɹ ǝzᴉɯᴉxɐɯ oʇ uǝǝɹɔs ɹnoʎ ǝʇɐʇoɹ ǝsɐǝlԀ ˙uʍop ǝpᴉsdn sᴉ ɥɔᴉɥʍ 'uǝǝɹɔs ɹnoʎ ʇᴉɟ oʇ pǝʇʇɐɯɹoɟ uǝǝq sɐɥ ʇxǝʇ sᴉɥ┴ Approved by the FDA. Made in a facility that also processes wheat, eggs, and radioactive materials. ¡noʎ ploʇ 'ǝǝS White text included at no additional charge.Warning: Although the company has taken reasonable precautions to ensure no viruses are present in this product, the company cannot accept responsibility for any loss or damage arising from the use of this cookie or attachments. The opinions expressed above are yours. They are not necessarily those of my employer or myself. The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of my employer, not necessarily mine, and probably not necessary. This message represents the official view of the voices in my head. This disclaimer is available to the visually impaird.Calorie measurements are estimates only - Individual weight loss may vary.Cook Thoroughly.Cookies will be extended to those persons born before 1901, as long as they are accompanied by their parents. Do not leave unattended. Do not prepare in a toaster oven or nuclear facility.
This supersedes any previous disclaimer: The above disclaimers may be inacurate and cookies will be provided in case of Shardic intervention.)

Posted

Huh. This kinda makes our Epic hunting Reckoners cell planning a bit superfluous since he'll just murder them all before we get a chance. :(

Posted

Huh. This kinda makes our Epic hunting Reckoners cell planning a bit superfluous since he'll just murder them all before we get a chance. :(

 

…unless we team up with him. He can be the real heavy, and the rest of us can keep him entertained with tales of elbow-eating Epics and pug pictures. :ph34r: 

Posted

…unless we team up with him. He can be the real heavy, and the rest of us can keep him entertained with tales of elbow-eating Epics and pug pictures. :ph34r:

And promise to keep all the fangirls at bay when they inevitably try to swarm him, led by an enthusiastic Edgerunner. :P

Posted

And promise to keep all the fangirls at bay when they inevitably try to swarm him, led by an enthusiastic Edgerunner. :P

 

So Remington fights all of the murderous Epics, while we keep the fangirls at bay. I can't tell who has the more dangerous job here. :P 

Posted

So Remington fights all of the murderous Epics, while we keep the fangirls at bay. I can't tell who has the more dangerous job here. :P

Who fights the murderous Epic fangirls?  :huh:

Posted

I'm reading the Dalles - well, skimming it, since I read up to the Panda Invasion before, so this is a refresher up to that point- and I just found something.

 

From here.



Hundredeyes had never quite gotten used to switching his vision around.

 

He was the newest Epic in the Architect’s ring, and he’d only had his powers for about a year. The Architect had immediately seen his powers for what they were: very excellent security. And so, Hundredeyes was Connell’s head of security. He spent his days rotating his vision between all of the Eyes he drawn out in the city, scanning for possible threats.

 

It was then that he saw the advancing cars and tanks.

 

He switched his vision to the nearest Eye and focused in on them. “Three cars,” he said, “and one tank. All fully weaponized.” He switched to his normal eyes and looked at one of the soldiers guarding him. “Warn the Architect--there might be Epics coming.” The soldier nodded and ran off to tell him.

Hundredeyes switched back to the Eye watching the cars. Suddenly two of them split off, and the other two started to attack. The vanilla guards of the city went out to attack, and were quickly cut down. One of them slumped against Hundredeyes’ Eye, instantly blinding him to the attack.

 

 

I read the Dalles a while ago, before I read the Reckoners books, and long before I invented Sentry, So clearly I stole the idea for Sentry's powers from Mail-mi subconsciously.

r6tqb.jpg

 

...No but seriously, sorry for the power theft.

 

Posted

Oh, quiver, its all good. :) Hundredeyes is a little different. And he was one of voidus' epics, and he was just cannon fodder. :)

Posted

I'm reading the Dalles - well, skimming it, since I read up to the Panda Invasion before, so this is a refresher up to that point- and I just found something.

 

From here.

 

I read the Dalles a while ago, before I read the Reckoners books, and long before I invented Sentry, So clearly I stole the idea for Sentry's powers from Mail-mi subconsciously.

r6tqb.jpg

 

...No but seriously, sorry for the power theft.

 

 

Oh, quiver, its all good. :) Hundredeyes is a little different. And he was one of voidus' epics, and he was just cannon fodder. :)

Yeah rule of thumb, it's not stealing if it's from one of mine. :P I have way too many Epics to claim all of their powersets for only my usage.

Posted

I'll try to keep that in mind for the future... though I have a confession to make:

 

I'm finding Dalles really hard to follow.

 

Part of that is probably because of the skimming -so I'm getting a little lost- but early on it feels very much like a spin-off of the Portland game. Considering I haven't read Portland, I'm a little confused as to who, precisely, Remington Springfield is, why Koeschi is such a big deal*, Backtrack's deal...

 

And, as a non-States person, I have to ask: how big is the Dalles, exactly? I'm assuming it's based on a real location, but- at least early on- it feels like characters are a lot more spread out than just a single city. Keeping track of all the different epics, and where they are, is a little... head-turning. 

 

 

*This is significantly motivated by the writing. Seriously, the writing you guys make is awesome in general, but all the Koeschi stuff?

I am torn between wanting to applaud Twi, or lock her up in some kind of asylum.

Posted

*This is significantly motivated by the writing. Seriously, the writing you guys make is awesome in general, but all the Koeschi stuff?

I am torn between wanting to applaud Twi, or lock her up in some kind of asylum.

The Question threads are the asylum.

Posted

I'll try to keep that in mind for the future... though I have a confession to make:

 

I'm finding Dalles really hard to follow.

 

Part of that is probably because of the skimming -so I'm getting a little lost- but early on it feels very much like a spin-off of the Portland game. Considering I haven't read Portland, I'm a little confused as to who, precisely, Remington Springfield is, why Koeschi is such a big deal*, Backtrack's deal...

 

And, as a non-States person, I have to ask: how big is the Dalles, exactly? I'm assuming it's based on a real location, but- at least early on- it feels like characters are a lot more spread out than just a single city. Keeping track of all the different epics, and where they are, is a little... head-turning. 

 

 

*This is significantly motivated by the writing. Seriously, the writing you guys make is awesome in general, but all the Koeschi stuff?

I am torn between wanting to applaud Twi, or lock her up in some kind of asylum.

Yeah it was the first new thread we started so it took a bit of adjusting to get it all settled. I think characters in the Dalles have been a bit more spread out too as opposed to Portland where even the separate factions are all relatively close to one another and all the action so far has happened in the middle of the city IIRC.

Posted

Joe is right. This thread is one big asylum which I have decorated with pug pictures and theories about Reader's secret crush on Autumn. :ph34r::P

If the thread is an insane asylum shouldn't there be sane people here looking after us or something?  :huh: 

AHHHH! THE SANE PEOPLE ARE SPYING ON US!!!!

Posted

If the thread is an insane asylum shouldn't there be sane people here looking after us or something?  :huh: 

AHHHH! THE SANE PEOPLE ARE SPYING ON US!!!!

 

I SAY WE DR. TARR AND PROFESSOR FETHER THIS PLACE.

Posted

If the thread is an insane asylum shouldn't there be sane people here looking after us or something? :huh:

AHHHH! THE SANE PEOPLE ARE SPYING ON US!!!!

Do you remember the times when we see Admins peeking in?

Posted

I'll try to keep that in mind for the future... though I have a confession to make:

 

I'm finding Dalles really hard to follow.

 

Part of that is probably because of the skimming -so I'm getting a little lost- but early on it feels very much like a spin-off of the Portland game. Considering I haven't read Portland, I'm a little confused as to who, precisely, Remington Springfield is, why Koeschi is such a big deal*, Backtrack's deal...

 

And, as a non-States person, I have to ask: how big is the Dalles, exactly? I'm assuming it's based on a real location, but- at least early on- it feels like characters are a lot more spread out than just a single city. Keeping track of all the different epics, and where they are, is a little... head-turning. 

 

 

*This is significantly motivated by the writing. Seriously, the writing you guys make is awesome in general, but all the Koeschi stuff?

I am torn between wanting to applaud Twi, or lock her up in some kind of asylum.

I can see where you are coming from, do you want a summary of why these things matter?

 

If the thread is an insane asylum shouldn't there be sane people here looking after us or something?  :huh: 

AHHHH! THE SANE PEOPLE ARE SPYING ON US!!!!

Clearly I am the most stable and sane person here, so I run this place. ALL OF YOU SHOULD JUST OBEY ME!

ae57d29be6e5910eff0935e0029bccb7.jpg

:P

Posted

I can see where you are coming from, do you want a summary of why these things matter?

 

Clearly I am the most stable and sane person here, so I run this place. ALL OF YOU SHOULD JUST OBEY ME!

ae57d29be6e5910eff0935e0029bccb7.jpg

:P

 

I can see where you are coming from, do you want a summary of why these things matter?

 

Clearly I am the most stable and sane person here, so I run this place. ALL OF YOU SHOULD JUST OBEY ME!

ae57d29be6e5910eff0935e0029bccb7.jpg

:P

No pugs and no Shipping make Homer something something.

Go crazy?

Don't mind if I do!

:P

Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...