TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 (edited) All right. Now that we know Calamity is an Epic, presumably some all-powerful gifter whose powers don't wear off after a time, we now need to determine his (her?) identity. (Pretty sure it's a he, but I could be wrong.) To do this, I am going to throw out every single guess I have and I encourage you good people to do likewise. Calamity is a NASA astronaut. Calamity is a NASA scientist. Calamity is a science experiment gone wrong, a la many, many comic books. Calamity is a science experiment gone right. Calamity is a serial killer. Calamity is a former member of Obliteration's church. Calamity is a former fan of Regalia's. Calamity is a member of a university bursar's office (which would explain his MO—preying on peoples' worst fears as he claims to give them the key to their future, only to exact a terrible, unthinkable price that isn't even written in the fine print). Calamity is Santa Claus. Calamity is an actual cannibal. Calamity is Michael Phelps. Calamity is your least favorite politician. Calamity is every politician. Calamity is you. Edited May 7, 2015 by TwiLyghtSansSparkles 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 Calamity is Santa Claus. Hey, my theory made it to the second round of speculation. I haven't given up hope that Calamity isn't native to our planet at all, and is actually an entity from a parallel universe. Perhaps a portal to this other universe was opened by NASA? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 7, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 Hey, my theory made it to the second round of speculation. I haven't given up hope that Calamity isn't native to our planet at all, and is actually an entity from a parallel universe. Perhaps a portal to this other universe was opened by NASA? I'm currently convinced there's something with alternate universes and NASA going on; if NASA wasn't involved, I doubt Sanderson would've made Tia a former rocket scientist. Plus, there's the whole thing with Megan's powers. If Calamity isn't from another planet, I'm thinking he was an astronaut from ours who was in the wrong place when the portal opened. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 I'm currently convinced there's something with alternate universes and NASA going on; if NASA wasn't involved, I doubt Sanderson would've made Tia a former rocket scientist. Plus, there's the whole thing with Megan's powers. If Calamity isn't from another planet, I'm thinking he was an astronaut from ours who was in the wrong place when the portal opened. I enjoyed the thought of Calamity being an eldritch abomination from beyond the stars, but given his humanoid form it seems likely that he will have had some connection to NASA. One thing to bear in mind is that according to Regalia, Calamity occasionally assigns powers based on their thematic appropriateness. Which implies... interesting things, I'm sure. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 7, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 I enjoyed the thought of Calamity being an eldritch abomination from beyond the stars, but given his humanoid form it seems likely that he will have had some connection to NASA. One thing to bear in mind is that according to Regalia, Calamity occasionally assigns powers based on their thematic appropriateness. Which implies... interesting things, I'm sure. Unless he took on a humanoid form because...reasons. Yeah, the NASA connection makes more sense, awesome as an Eldritch abomination would be. Unless he assigns "thematically appropriate" powers as a matter of course and he just told Regalia that to make her stop asking if he was really really sure David's powers would be what she wanted. In seriousness, though, I think Calamity prefers powers that fit thematically or ironically. Take Steelheart, the school bully whose powers made him the biggest kid on the playground; or Curveball, a terrible shot whose gun never runs out of ammo. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redbird Posted May 7, 2015 Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 Calamity is an actual cannibal. I just want to know how Shia LaBeouf ended up as Calamity. And would that still be an average Tuesday night for him? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 7, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 7, 2015 I just want to know how Shia LaBeouf ended up as Calamity. And would that still be an average Tuesday night for him? Meta answer: As an inside joke in the Reckoners RPG. In-world answer: I don't think the how is as important as the fact that he's lurking in the shadows, living in the woods and killing for sport. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vaidd Posted May 8, 2015 Report Share Posted May 8, 2015 Calamity is a member of a university bursar's office (which would explain his MO—preying on peoples' worst fears as he claims to give them the key to their future, only to exact a terrible, unthinkable price that isn't even written in the fine print). If TwiLyghtSansSparkles were an epic, her weakness would be student loan bills. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zas678 Posted May 8, 2015 Report Share Posted May 8, 2015 "Quick send her the leter" Twi goes unsuspectingly to her mailbox at her fortress, opens her mailbox, and sees..... Not that. Anything but that. She begins to quake, and begins to run. They have to know. Whoever sent it knows. She tries to engage her powers, but she knows they won't work. The last thing she hears is the explosion of gunfire. She falls to the ground. If only she had planned ahead. If only she had paid her bills. 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 8, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 8, 2015 "Quick send her the leter" Twi goes unsuspectingly to her mailbox at her fortress, opens her mailbox, and sees..... Not that. Anything but that. She begins to quake, and begins to run. They have to know. Whoever sent it knows. She tries to engage her powers, but she knows they won't work. The last thing she hears is the explosion of gunfire. She falls to the ground. If only she had planned ahead. If only she had paid her bills. This has to be the only assassination attempt in fictional history involving overdue bills. And the only one with a chance of success. Though I always pay on time, so the Reckoners will need to think of something else. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surgebound Rainspren Posted May 10, 2015 Report Share Posted May 10, 2015 Calamity is you. How did you know...! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King Posted May 10, 2015 Report Share Posted May 10, 2015 How did you know...! How come I didn't get awesome superpowers, Surgebound? Didn't you think of your fellow forumeers at all?! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 10, 2015 How come I didn't get awesome superpowers, Surgebound? Didn't you think of your fellow forumeers at all?! Perhaps he knew evil!Kobold was something the world just wasn't ready to face. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kobold King Posted May 10, 2015 Report Share Posted May 10, 2015 Perhaps he knew evil!Kobold was something the world just wasn't ready to face. Assuming my sense of sloth is as corrupted as the rest of me, I think I'd just sit around all day making snarky comments about other people. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwiLyghtSansSparkles Posted May 10, 2015 Author Report Share Posted May 10, 2015 Assuming my sense of sloth is as corrupted as the rest of me, I think I'd just sit around all day making snarky comments about other people. You're Mister Meh? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StormingTexan Posted May 11, 2015 Report Share Posted May 11, 2015 I just assumed Calamity was Brandon's foreshadowing of the upcoming MLP books everyone here seems to want. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackhoof Posted May 12, 2015 Report Share Posted May 12, 2015 I am of the opinion that Calamity was an astronaut working for NASA who was conducting an experiment in outer space for them. An experiment involving alternate dimensions. They open a portal, the astronaut gets blasted by cosmic rays or something, and he turns into Calamity, sprouting wings and glowing red. NASA freaks out and is unable to contact him, and cannot even see him anymore, the glow is too much (I think David was only able to make out wings because of the interaction between them.) Then Calamity wakes up, or comes out of hibernation, or something, and starts gifting people powers. Or perhaps the portal itself is the glowing red star, and Calamity floats in front of it on his wings, bathed in light and directing its power to Epicify people. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sarcasm Posted May 16, 2015 Report Share Posted May 16, 2015 All right. Now that we know Calamity is an Epic, presumably some all-powerful gifter whose powers don't wear off after a time, we now need to determine his (her?) identity. (Pretty sure it's a he, but I could be wrong.) To do this, I am going to throw out every single guess I have and I encourage you good people to do likewise. Calamity is a NASA astronaut. Calamity is a NASA scientist. Calamity is a science experiment gone wrong, a la many, many comic books. Calamity is a science experiment gone right. Calamity is a serial killer. Calamity is a former member of Obliteration's church. Calamity is a former fan of Regalia's. Calamity is a member of a university bursar's office (which would explain his MO—preying on peoples' worst fears as he claims to give them the key to their future, only to exact a terrible, unthinkable price that isn't even written in the fine print). Calamity is Santa Claus. Calamity is an actual cannibal. Calamity is Michael Phelps. Calamity is your least favorite politician. Calamity is every politician. Calamity is you. Calamity is a stick. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the winter system Posted May 16, 2015 Report Share Posted May 16, 2015 You mean the stick? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
natc Posted May 19, 2015 Report Share Posted May 19, 2015 You mean the stick? He has flaming wings. The stick will never give in like that. He is just a stick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moash Posted July 27, 2015 Report Share Posted July 27, 2015 I think that Calamity is actually the divine Ogrelord Shrek. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Guardian Posted August 9, 2015 Report Share Posted August 9, 2015 He has flaming wings. The stick will never give in like that. He is just a stick. Don't worry. The stick is merely wreathed in flames of power (in the shape of wings). It has not changed form, merely been made more visible so that more may bask in its deificness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angsos Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 Calamity is a shard who got lost on the way to the cosmere Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Star Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 Chuck Norris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackhoof Posted August 24, 2015 Report Share Posted August 24, 2015 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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