Three Word Story Redux (forum game)

[Renoux]

place they call

[Queen Elsa Steelheart]

America. Suddenly, there

[Dani]

was a crash

[Renoux]

because Americans are

[Stick.]

quite reckless when

[Renoux]

Driving. They text

[Stick.]

and eat at

[Dani]

and eat and

[Renoux]

just keep eating!!

[Stick.]

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Shard, I bring to you, the magnificent writing by 17th Sharders:

(This is a 100% nonsense haha)

 

Smashing Twinkies can eat banana skins because the logical equation of Brandon's magic system tells of a great run-on sentence, made 

of strawberries and crem. Besides, the laws of physics even cry when you don't read the clearly-defined instruction because that is a travesty of not obeying the whims, or, perhaps, a mysterious unexplained order of evil deeds and crazy lunatics.

Now, shall you want to bake a cake? A cake that transforms anyone who tastes it into a mighty chasmfiend. The mighty cake was reserved for only the greatest men that wielded shard blades while singing songs of ages and then competed Horneater folk dances only to discover that they had left the butter in a copy of a duck that also happened to contain the greatest secret of the Alethi court; which was that thy had all the chocolate in southern Sacrial, because Hoid and Demoux murdered the Shards.

 

This was all unknown to the chaotic murderous Seons who walked across the universeeeeeeeee! Also, thinking themselves funny were their dreaded cursed cheese Danishes. 

 

However, these pastries could not abide the thought of the sudden departure frightened them. Why frightened them? It exhilarated them beyond belief as they jumped into the well of ascension only to have his face eaten.

 

By ponies who really didn't like to brag but, we're not yellow. So they couldn't fulfill their destiny as Sticks with Shallan and Fire. But they could say oaths to their Nahel spren!

 

There were many painful memories of the era when twimom was present. No one knew how it happened but all resolved when the ponies arrived, they would banish her to the depths of a little mauve, where they used to sacrifice goats and a few purple plum pies to the indifferent Flying Spaghetti Monster.

 

His noody goodness slurped into eternity as he contemplated the ephemeral evanescence of the vast span of the millennia. Elements of Harmony turned Odium into a statue that picked his nose. 

Odium was not like discord but he did form the only thing that could save the brain weasels from Kaymyth's fury and also bake Dark Alley Cookies, very awkward bookies and rhythm rookies and a tree, but nothing else.

But Odiums weasels had already infested the only thing that was impervious like the only living stick-like omega stick insect which had banished countless evils.

 

Meanwhile, Odium's odious orangutan released the swarm of brain weasels upon the land. A hero rose, covered in thorns grasping the handle of a mug filled with pure essence of awesome. It tasted rather like a salty piece of bacon. Having sufficiently caffeinated, the gathered masses became very omnipotent me ate fondue.

But Kelsier murdered the Lord Ruler's steel inquisitor's pugs and Twy attacked with the fury of the seven Shardwraiths of Helmore and went on to build a snowman. This project angered the Shardwraiths who immediately decided that the snowman was too good to stay frozen.

 

So they created a fabrial flamethrower to roast snowmen and their betrayal of the gods splintered Adonalism again, causing the breaking of a Stick which was Sticky and very brown which made ponies that are brown with steelheart marks and Nighthound died and so Equestria ruled the universe with steelhearts and pink cupcakes covered in hearts and rainbow glitter that destroyed everything around. The bearers of the shards decided "I want chocolate!" 

So, together they ate people's heads but were unsatisfied. 

"Complain thee not!" , Aslan said suddenly.

The shards gasped. "Alas! This run-on sounds super disjointed!"

But it is in fact, a practical skill to use if you make a career at a library in the Hushlands.

 

Of course, there make spiked sandwiches. Sandwiches? Steel inquisitors are very good at spiking food. So good that they weren't destroyed even when everyone started puking horses and turning into Alethi airsick lowlanders. 

Then Rock yelled "Look, I found more Chull dung!" 

As soon as his voice reached the peaks of Kaladin's eyebrows, he responded with a gesture of flailing which was taken to be quite as a complement offensive to anyone who pooped recently in their Shardplate.

 

The local inquisitors threw their hands in the air in exasperation  and didn't even care that everyone was covered in pie and falling down the stairs of the Great Tower of Minas Morgul, who really liked Lin Manuel Miranda but really hated Lin Manuel Miranda as a result of an argument. 

The bananas in Scadrial were spiked, and so were quite dangerous to the cookies. So, all the spren got mad at Donald Trump and assassinated him. Everyone cheered but it just wasn't enough so they started twerking and smelling Pikachu's Pokemon food in order to confuse the audience.

 

They never realised a new idealised crowd had joined that was judging Pokemon Go and was totally right about that fact: It was silly and stupid and way too popular people that were of dubious origin from the ugly place they call America.

 

Suddenly, there was a crash because Americans are quite reckless when driving. They text and eat and eat and just keep eating!!

Edited August 14, 2016 by I_am_a_Stick

[Renoux]

Wow, that was really disjointed in some places, but in others, it actually had some semblance of grammar and sense for a few sentences. 

[Dani]

And ninjas made it worse hahah 

[Renoux]

No kidding. That was funny. Should someone start a new one? I can.

Edited August 14, 2016 by Renoux

[Dani]

1 minute ago, Renoux said:

No kidding. That was funny. Should someone start a new one? I can.

All right 

[Renoux]

Cool, it's started up!

[Queen Elsa Steelheart]

Love the end result lol