The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "Then don't try." "I'm not."
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "Instead accept your goddamn mistakes." Ayia was shaking again. "Accept your goddamn sins and your wounds and your scars. Stop running from what you did, because you'll only die a failure. If you're so afraid of your power, then learn to control it. Stake your life on becoming strong. Stake your life on becoming powerful. Stake it on fighting, stake it on becoming the kind of person you wish you were a million years ago when those people died."
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 1 minute ago, Channelknight Fadran said: "Instead accept your goddamn mistakes." Ayia was shaking again. "Accept your goddamn sins and your wounds and your scars. Stop running from what you did, because you'll only die a failure. If you're so afraid of your power, then learn to control it. Stake your life on becoming strong. Stake your life on becoming powerful. Stake it on fighting, stake it on becoming the kind of person you wish you were a million years ago when those people died." "Did I not tell you? I am as powerful now as I ever can be. I'm not afraid of my power. And I cannot become a different kind of person."
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "If you're not afraid, then why are you trying to hide?"
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "If you're not afraid, then why are you trying to hide?" "Because people are still clearly coming after me, and that puts you both in danger. That's what I'm afraid of."
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "You don't know us. We're not yours to save. I can take care of myself, Allera can take care of herself, and you can take care of yourself."
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "You don't know us. We're not yours to save. I can take care of myself, Allera can take care of herself, and you can take care of yourself." "Why should it matter if you're my responsibility or not by some arbitrary metric? You're still in less danger if I leave. One person in danger is better than three."
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "It doesn't matter," Ayia said, "because you're in less danger if you stay. Because we can help you. And you can help us, and somehow we can maybe stick a thorn in the side of whatever mad wizards are trying to kill us. Hell, did you think you're the only who's killed people? Or the only person who people have died for, even without any reason? That perhaps standing on a pile of bodies is enough to let you join them? "I've killed far more than you if you can remember their faces. I've been the villain in hundreds of people's stories because they believed on thing and I believed another. I've fought to save millions from slavery and oppression by killing the people who'd been pulled into drawing it out. Nothing can redeem me from that anymore. No torture or death agonizing enough can begin to match the suffering I've caused. All I have to show for it is to keep fighting for what I killed them for. I'm fighting for what my mother taught me, I'm fighting for what Élter died to give me, and I'm fighting for anyone else I can save because the worst disgrace I can spit on the souls of people I've ended is to give up now."
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 1 minute ago, Channelknight Fadran said: "It doesn't matter," Ayia said, "because you're in less danger if you stay. Because we can help you. And you can help us, and somehow we can maybe stick a thorn in the side of whatever mad wizards are trying to kill us. Hell, did you think you're the only who's killed people? Or the only person who people have died for, even without any reason? That perhaps standing on a pile of bodies is enough to let you join them? "I've killed far more than you if you can remember their faces. I've been the villain in hundreds of people's stories because they believed on thing and I believed another. I've fought to save millions from slavery and oppression by killing the people who'd been pulled into drawing it out. Nothing can redeem me from that anymore. No torture or death agonizing enough can begin to match the suffering I've caused. All I have to show for it is to keep fighting for what I killed them for. I'm fighting for what my mother taught me, I'm fighting for what Élter died to give me, and I'm fighting for anyone else I can save because the worst disgrace I can spit on the souls of people I've ended is to give up now." Variance stood in silence for a long moment. "I don't want to be frozen like this forever."
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "And I don't want you to give up and die now when there's more you can give back to the world."
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "And I don't want you to give up and die now when there's more you can give back to the world." "Nothing is making sense. Why are we... something's missing." He seemed extremely confused. "Not when I am frozen. Then it doesn't make a difference, does it? It doesn't feel right." His words bordered on nonsensical.
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 1 minute ago, Channelknight Fadran said: Blast. "...Variance?" Variance locked eyes with Ayia. Then, to her eyes, he looked like Élter. Exactly. Down to everything she could remember.
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Even the smile was exactly the same. "Variance..." She whispered. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to scare you."
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: Even the smile was exactly the same. "Variance..." She whispered. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to scare you." "What should I have done differently?" It was the same voice, the same tone.
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 How did he know this? What was he seeing? "Élter's gone, Vari. I know he is. And I... I think about him every day. He wanted me to keep living and keep fighting, and he'd want me to make sure you keep trying too." Quote btw if I'm keeping you up feel free to just dip - I've moved away from the dense psychological stuff by now
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: How did he know this? What was he seeing? "Élter's gone, Vari. I know he is. And I... I think about him every day. He wanted me to keep living and keep fighting, and he'd want me to make sure you keep trying too." "Do you resent me for dying?"
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "Allera, do you have those stones your friend gave us?" @Szeth_Pancakes Quote for when you return - I might actually try to sleep or something now
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 (edited) 16 minutes ago, Channelknight Fadran said: "Allera, do you have those stones your friend gave us?" Suddenly, Variance was back to normal. The confusion had vanished from his eyes. "I think that makes sense. I'll... I'll go with you. I'm sorry for arguing so much. That was a waste of time, I think." He paused. "I just did something, didn't I? Something... unusual?" @Channelknight Fadran Edited June 3, 2023 by The Aspiring Archivist
Szeth Pancakes he/they Posted June 3, 2023 Author Posted June 3, 2023 9 hours ago, Channelknight Fadran said: "Allera, do you have those stones your friend gave us?" @Szeth_Pancakes “Here.” Allera procured the stones from their pockets. They still glowed with a faint purple light. 9 hours ago, The Aspiring Archivist said: Suddenly, Variance was back to normal. The confusion had vanished from his eyes. "I think that makes sense. I'll... I'll go with you. I'm sorry for arguing so much. That was a waste of time, I think." He paused. "I just did something, didn't I? Something... unusual?" @Channelknight Fadran “Thank you.”
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 9 hours ago, The Aspiring Archivist said: Suddenly, Variance was back to normal. The confusion had vanished from his eyes. "I think that makes sense. I'll... I'll go with you. I'm sorry for arguing so much. That was a waste of time, I think." He paused. "I just did something, didn't I? Something... unusual?" @Channelknight Fadran "Sure did. You don't remember?"
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "Sure did. You don't remember?" "No. I just feel like something changed. What happened?"
Channelknight Fadran Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 "You... changed." Ayia furrowed her brow. "Does you curse do that?"
The Aspiring Archivist any pronouns Posted June 3, 2023 Posted June 3, 2023 Just now, Channelknight Fadran said: "You... changed." Ayia furrowed her brow. "Does your curse do that?" "I don't know. What did I change into?"
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