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The radio began playing once more.

"Hello all, and welcome back to The Longest Thread- Misadventures™! As always, my name is Bacon the Bard, here to fill you in on all the plots, tangents, and absolute nonsense that you missed out on!

Our last episode ended (circa pg. 2753) with the imminent arrival of the Great Wizard. Expectations were high. Were the accusations of the Brave Adventurer mere slander? Would the mighty sorcerer be able to explain the nature of the two most dangerous Plotblades? Was a romance developing between Nogard and Subversion? Will we finally find out what keeps Shoe so tight-lipped?

In this episode, we will see prophecies and battles, friendships forged and rivalries inflamed. New enemies and old alike will stand in the path of our heroes. The forces of the Brave Adventurers will strike a massive blow against our unnamed heroes, and the party will be splintered. All this, and a new character more terrifying than anything I've ever seen, on this week's episode of the Longest Thread!

~Theme Song plays~

We begin with the arrival of the Great Wizard at the snowy mountain. He does not come alone; he brings with him the mighty warrior Selppaenip, slayer of pineapples, as well as Selppaenip's rather ordinary instructor. (Why can't I remember his name...? Oh well, it's probably not that important.) Nogard is surprised and delighted to discover that the Great Wizard is in fact the invisible-rabbit wizard of previous acquaintance. Zanitar, on the other hand, remains suspicious, uncertain if the accusations leveled by the Brave Adventurer are entirely unfounded. 

The Great Wizard reveals that he did in fact conceal the existence of the twin Plotblades (and his search for them) from the Council, fearing that they were too powerful to be used by anyone. He refuses to reveal their names, as doing so would open them up to being claimed and used. Instead, he plans to wait for as long as possible until they are inevitably found, then steal them and take them to the Dreamsmith to be rendered safe. He reveals that there are certain people who could claim the blades. He then proceeds to give a prophecy naming those individuals.

Meanwhile, the Baron of Wrath awakens in a far-off location, dying- but not yet dead. He heals himself, and a mysterious voice instructs him to reclaim the Plotblades taken by Tull. He departs, making his way to the snowy mountain.

At roughly the same time, Tull suddenly collapses, facing an immense attack from a mysterious woman- evidently the one behind the mysterious voice commanding Wrath. The debilitating mental pain leaves him unable to use Narration, and soon thereafter he begins acting oddly. He teleports away without explanation, and Erif and Subversion follow.

Tull materializes in front of Wrath and his mysterious master, who reveals her name to be Madness. Wrath reclaims the Plotblades from Tull, merging them into one, and Madness attacks Subversion. Erif attacks Wrath, eventually finding success in using his Metallic Arts to rip pieces of Wrath out of him, causing him to flee. Unfortunately for Erif, as he pursues Wrath the mad Baron unleashes a powerful elemental attack that blows him to smithereens. (But this isn't the first time Erif has died, as we all know, so don't worry: I'm sure he'll be fine.)

With Erif out of the way, however, I am free to involve myself in the battle. I use some minor Narration to harry the Baron until Madness turns her attention to me and begins attacking me as well. Fortunately for me, I'm already insane! Alarmingly, however, with Madness's unique attack, I develop a split personality disorder- and my newly born alter ego is terrifying. I shudder to even name him, lest by doing so I somehow resummon him: B-A-C-O-N-T-H-E-T-A-X-C-O-L-L-E-C-T-O-R. Madness had no idea what she had just unleashed. My nightmare alter ego nearly summons Onyx and ruins everything, but fortunately Madness's nemesis Intellect appears and (with some timely assistance from @Immortal Platypus) returns me to normal insanity. He also frees Tull and offers to help Subversion win her fight. (So all in all, very much a problem solver. But he did get rid of He Who Shall Not Be Named, so I guess I can't be too mad.)

Ista shows up with Intellect and defeats Wrath (who's real name is, apparently, Berin) through the power of forgiveness. She takes the Plotblades, which Intellect proceeds to destroy. (Apparently they were fake the entire time! Oh well, I guess that's life.)

Erif reappears near Tull at roughly the same time Ista does, and she explains the situation with Madness and Intellect (as well as a new being, named Mirth). Tull then returns the group to the snowy mountain. Hacob hugs Subversion and incurs the full might of her wrath. Subversion debates showing Madness the true power of Narrators but decides instead to accept Intellect's help and just end the battle.

Back at the mountain, the Great Wizard gives his prophecy.

On 10/12/2024 at 1:39 AM, NameIess said:

"I cannot tell you where the Plotblades are, for I do not know myself. I can tell you only the names of those who could walk to path necessary to claim them." The Great Wizard raised his hands, drawing his rabbits to attention. Glowing green eyes appeared floating in a circle around him as some of his herd shared their rabbity prophetic powers. Other rabbits uninvisiblified themselves in such a way as to create a slideshow of the people he spoke of (or a crude representation, in the case of those without true physical form). He spoke then, in a voice that was not his own. "To find the Blades, seekest those around whom Plot spins most wildly. Madness, that being who seeks to invade the Thread and bend it to her will. Gail, the girl named Great Failure, bondholder of Qodi, greater than she yet believes. The Brave Adventurer, schemer, inheritor of a mantle forged by greater men for men greater yet than they. Selppaenip, hero too mighty for his own good. These you must watch closely. Yet others could claim the prize. The Witherlord, greatest darkness, ever gnawing away at the world's roots. The Valiant One, betrayed, clinging to honor yet drowning in lies. Subversion twice over, for the paths she could yet take, for the paths she sees in truth. The Dreamsmith, longing for a life stolen from him. And others, many others, but one more. Nogard, child of Onyx. Claim the Blade you could, and escape the cruel fate that may yet consume you. Watch them, watch all. For Plot twists and turns, and any could claim the Blades. Watch even your own heart, lest it betray you."

Nogard is stunned to hear his own name in the prophecy. He is uncertain of what to do, but Shoe has an idea. For the first time, Shoe communicates by writing things down! (So I guess that answers one question. He can produce language; he just can't verbalize. Go crazy with that, theorists!) He points out that because so many of the wielders are already in their group, they probably just need to stay together and they'll naturally keep each other in check. They realize, however, that many of the people spoken of in the prophecy that are not with them will be antagonistic to their cause.

While all this is happening, a ghost girl (named Sasha) appears out of nowhere. Gail, Beosta, and Shoe chat with her and learn of her strange life underground, as well as her death to a monster. (Meanwhile the Narrators commence a long and boring argument regarding lore that fortunately ends before Onyx makes an appearance.) Beosta makes a rude comment somewhere along the way, and so Livetha Narrates away her voice. (She will proceed to return and take away Beosta's voice at arbitrary intervals hereafter.) Beosta and Shoe share use of the pad to communicate and bond slightly over their silence. Beosta asks the one question we all want to know the answer to... and Shoe refuses to answer. (The tension is rising, listeners!)

At some point during all of this (the timeline is rather fuzzy) Nogard and Subversion have a brief conversation where he talks a little bit about his past. Nogard gets serious, Subversion gets nervous - but then, all of a sudden, the Brave Adventurers attack!

As the army of adventurers swarm the Nameless Adventurers, Erif teleports Ista and Tull away, not interested in being captured again.

Nogard attempts to make peace, but the army (led by the General) is not interested. So the fight begins! Everyone uses their unique skill and talents to face the adventurers. Shoe and Beosta have a brief moment in the middle of the fighting where Beosta reveals a little bit more about her past. Then they get back to fighting.

Livetha, however, is not interested in fighting. She heard from Yrank that he had a stoat friend a long time ago and is instead interested in helping him find her. So she teleports Yrank, Beosta, Shoe (who was about to get maced by the General) and Sasha away from the battle.

Subversion clashes with the General and gets knocked out by one of her maces. Nogard, dismayed, regroups defensively at her position. Hacob realizes that if Nogard leaves, he will be able to use Narration against the General, and so tells him to retreat with Subversion. Nogard recruits the help of the OA, who portals them (along with Selppaenip and his very ordinary master) into a private pocket dimension.

The Valiant One clashes with the Great Wizard and gets buried under a pile of invisible rabbits.

As soon as OA's portal closes, Hacob teleports himself, Zanitar, and the General to an arena with great plot significance, and they continue their battle. The General however, offers a deal; allow just a few of the adventurers to be captured, to make for a better story. She reveals that the scattering of the Nameless Heroes has all been according to plan.

After Erif teleports away with Tull and Ista, Tull is suddenly beset by Madness. He feels a pull to give in, but Erif and Ista help him hold on to his sanity. They meet the oracle, and Erif complains about the Book of Unwinding Thread. Ista points out that Erif never would have met her or Tull without his search for the book. The oracle tells him that he should read the entirety of the book before complaining about its usefulness, and disappears. Tull reads the book and realizes that it contains stories about happenings on TLT, both ancient and current.

After their teleport, Yrank, Beosta and Shoe land in the middle of a forest and begins their search. They follow Livetha, and Beosta and Shoe chat a little more with Sasha. I show up and give her a ghost hat, which just so happens to be the home of my rabbit companion, Lettuce. (Sorry again for burning your house down, Lettuce). Sasha is reassured by the rabbit's fluffy presence. Beosta is once again silent and feeling grumpy about it. I chat back and forth with the group until at last we find Hacob's stoat (named Castom). Yrank and Castom have a heartfelt reunion.

They are interrupted by a couple of Lords of Color (rabbits that control certain colors; in this case Blue and Green.) Blue and Green have a fight, in which Blue slays Green and claims his color for himself. I get a new piano.

The rest of the group mostly ignores the rabbits. Beosta and Shoe have a chat. Shoe talks about the adventure with Nogard to find the Spear of Instakans, and then inadvertently hints at a 'something'- or perhaps  a 'someone'- that he is looking for. Beosta offers to help him out as part of her final project, but Shoe rejects her help, once again upset by the topic. He goes and is sad by himself for a little bit, until Livetha teleports him and Beosta to an alleyway in a place of paper-white-skinned people. She tells Beosta that everyone there hates them. She is soon proven right when Shoe and Beosta are captured by two white-skinned people and thrown in jail. (Livetha escapes them, giggling.) Unable to think of a way to escape, they chat together using the notepad about shoes and Beosta's school. Beosta explains that she has two weeks to finish her final project, or lose her bond with Livetha. While they are talking, a man comes to take them to be interrogated.

After the OA portals Nogard, Subversion and Selppaenip to his pocket dimension, Subversion wakes up, but she is still injured. The group soon realizes that they are being followed by a person known as the Silent Hero. Selppaenip's master explains that the Silent Hero can channel the spirit of past heroes. With no way of defeating him, the OA creates another portal and the group flees.

In the middle of all of the fighting, Sequence has a chat with Gail. Gail explains the nature of her final with Qodi. Sequence assures her she is not the failure she sees herself as, but Gail isn't convinced. Sequence offers to take her away from the fighting, but Qodi wants to fight, so Sequence leaves by herself (much to the dismay of her Plotblade, Conflict.) I meet up with Sequence and have a brief chat.

Back on the snowy mountaintop, TP the Plan Beast (who was too large to follow Selppaenip through the OA's portal) decides to help Gail with the fighting. He rescues Jilu as well, who has inexplicably begun turning things red.

Shortly thereafter, Zanitar and Hacob return from their meeting with the General, and they reveal that they have made a deal to end the fighting. TP suggests that they recover their wayward party members, but realizes that he doesn't know where any of them have gone.

And thus our episode ends with our heroes divided, and we are once again left with more questions than answers. What secrets does the Book of Unwinding Thread hold, and is Erif's mind capable of bearing them? Who is the group that has captured Shoe and Beosta, and what do they want with them? Will Nogard, Subversion, Selppaenip and the OA be able to outrun the Silent Hero? What part will Sequence play in the story moving forwards? And what exactly is the General's plan? Find answers to all these questions and more in the next episode of The Longest Thread- Misadventures™! Thank you all for listening, and have a good night.