Conure1243

Finally! That took too long.

This is a test prologue I'm writing for my story - Whispers of the Ancient Stars. Whether or not this will make it into the final book is undetermined. Anyway, here it is! Let me know what you think! Prologue: Broken Gods If only humanity could have understood just how fragile their gods' powers were. Zelias roamed the streets of Erylen in the dark. Something was here, though what, they didn’t fully understand. Powerless indeed. Even after millennia spent as a god, Zelias felt weak. The three Great Souls, of which Zelias was a part, each wandered the kingdom streets, in search of a threat. They knew not what that threat was, nor what could be done. A great soul could not perceive the mortal world, any better than the mortals themselves. Zelias raised their draconic hands to the alley wall, scales and claws meeting stone. The kingdom was built upon their own grave, and Zelias could not help but feel sentimental to again roam these grounds. The place where Zelias, after a lifetime of rejection, finally found acceptance in their final moments. A tear dropped to the ground. Grief. Zelias could still feel it. This was good. Gods should care for their world. This city was dying. The trade routes that sustained it and the neighboring lands had been destroyed, whether it was by man or natural forces. However, Gods shouldn’t have been broken. Zelias was nothing if not broken. Focus! Zelias told themself. They scanned the streets. The creature had been here. Zelias could feel that much. The signs of a powerful wraith, unnatural blackness spilling across the ground like blood, were only visible to a spirit’s eyes. Such a dominant wraith should not have been able to manifest without the notice of the Great Souls, and the seal was strong. The suffering of Zelias and their companions was enough to ensure that the raging souls of the dead were contained. The trail led down the alleys. Zelias followed them. There did not seem to be any pattern to where they led, until Zelias, after several hours of following, found the creature that they hunted. Rayah, unsurprisingly, had reached it first. Zelias’ companion stood stiff, clad in bright, flowing robes adorned with swirling patterns, reminiscent of Zelias’ old blade. She stood, watching with horror at a mortal man, who hunched over a barrel, shaking and suffering alone in the dark. To the Souls, it seemed to be born of dark blood. The Wraith was still bonded to a living creature? “They are suffering.” Rayah said, “I tried to listen. This person only cries in agony.” “How?” Zelias whispered, “How did this happen?” “I don’t know.” Rayah admitted, “There seems to be no trace of anything other than this dark creature. I… I don’t believe there is anything we could do.” “We could find a champion.” Zelias said, “Have a mortal come to drive a blade through their heart. Surely it would be a mercy.” “No.” Rayah said, “We let it die on its own. It is not yet dire enough for a Champion. For now, I say we let it live. That is…” “Unless it manages to pose a threat.” Rayah nodded. The sun began to rise, exposing the fragile souls to mortal eyes. Rayah looked toward Zelias, then toward the broken person. She faded, returning to the star that was her home. Zelias watched her leave, then again glanced at the suffering creature. They did not find grief this time. As Zelias looked at this creature, they found only hatred. That was a clear sign that they had to leave. If Zelias let themselves betray the other two, and had a Champion slay this creature… It would not end well. Hatred from a god would only end in catastrophe. In an act of restraint, Zelias left the suffering creature to die in the streets. A bit short, as it's a relatively new part of the story. Let me know your thoughts!

What did I miss? Also... *mumbles something unintelligible*

I'm out of ideas! It's not like I'm actually original or something

Mmmm. Killing star will never cause me to get strike three. Burning hasn't worked. (That's unusual...) *Ties a bow and shows off to @Through The Living Star*

*Burns Star* Anyway, POTATO should probably be referred to as something that also makes people remember that Ketchup and POTATO merged

Uhhhhh... I have nothing. Why do we have such different writing styles?! If you removed the worldbuilding from Emerald of the Shattered Skies the story wouldn't function. And it's impossible to miss the worldbuilding. And Worldbuilding Docs are created alongside a story!

I burn down all of the worldbuilding then. Now your stories take place in a normal world. Is this strike three worthy? You have, I guess had good Worldbuilding.

Fine... *Burns down Star's Worldbuilding Notes*

*Grins and grabs backup lighter*

Hmmmm... I'm trying to get strike 3. I'm gonna go burn down Star's favorite story.

POTATO is specifically bolded.

Strike... Two... *Slaps Star twice with sword*

Ketchup, POTATO, or Neutral. Every single person in a neutral party has their own party.

Never mind, I'm changing sides. I'm joining the ribbon people. (Also Neutral)

*Questions Star's Lists*

We make a lot of lists in this thread. Maybe I'll make a list of recurring lists

I think everybody is just inventing a new neutral side now.

I know I shouldn't be surprised that nobody cares about my strange comments at this point, this thread is the equivalent of what happens if somebody set a horse (equipped with several forms of heavy weaponry and capable of mass destruction) on fire and sent it through the city to see what was destroyed. Yet still, I can just casually say I'm joining the Bystander penguins of the Alps without anybody questioning.

I lost sleep at night trying to plan my action, and basically ended up imagining just a chain of people all following this person who's following this person and so on and so forth. At 3:00 AM, it was hilarious. Anyways, I'm trying to plan a move for tonight. Anybody got a suggestion for the sake of coordination?

I'm going to align myself with the Bystander Penguins of the Alps

Okay... I'm very unsure at this point May change my vote again. I'm so confused... Might even just take back all votes for now. I don't know if I am confident in any accusation Doc12 No accusation (for now, at least)

I'm starting to become convinced. Fine, let's do this, I guess. Fizz9, Doc12

Nah, I'm already too full with the lead I ate earlier

We need to be more original with our murder methods.