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The Aspiring Archivist

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  1. "Chaos is easier, yes. It is the natural state of the universe. But it isn't better. I think each moment you have left is no less valuable just because there will eventually be no more. That was always the case. It just so happens that the end is closer than you might have imagined. But any truly meaningful moment that can be found in that short time is worth more than an infinity of meaningless void."
  2. "You aren't. It's alright. It's good to say some of these things out loud."
  3. "I want to help. I want to protect. I want to understand, and use that understanding to create something better of this."
  4. Some uniformed people arrived, eventually bright by the medic once he had seen that Julie and Daniel were not going to help. "What is it?"
  5. "Not quite. I have inserted myself into all this, though not completely. For one, it is difficult to be asking the nobility without being born into a house. For another, my motivations are atypical."
  6. She went red, and seemed to try to respond. Her voice caught.
  7. He nodded. "It pains me to see people suffer for such arbitrary notions of power and status. But such is the way of people. There is no true meaning to be found, so you create it, and never realize when you've begun to create a cage for yourselves."
  8. "You can't possibly know that they're true."
  9. "I see. What, exactly, is your concern? Obscurity?"
  10. "Why?" she asked softly. "Why do you believe these things about me?"
  11. She resisted reflexively.
  12. "Thank you, though there was not much reason for concern." Envoy paused. "He has hurt you again. I am sorry. I imagine I am culpable."
  13. She stared at him for a long while, gaze soft and terribly sad.
  14. Envoy was there among the flowers, a stark contrast to the bright colors.
  15. The connection between them was still open, and she reached out, wanting to know and understand more of what he saw.
  16. "I'm sorry."
  17. "There's nothing wrong with you," she said softly aloud. "Meanwhile, I'm a failed student who works herself to death anyway, and who absorbs the well-meaning lies she gets from people day to day because they all see she's worthless too."
  18. He felt a trickle of thought and emotion from her, much less than what he had shared. Fear, uncertainty, exhaustion, pain. Hatred, for herself more than anything else. Comfort in his presense.
  19. Daniel felt the connection, and somehow understood what it was. He had a certain level of control over what was presented to it. Julie pulled herself closer to him, beginning to shake slightly again.
  20. As she leaned on him, Daniel felt a brief shock.
  21. She didn't move or respond.
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