Lunamor

Well, 99.99% of it at least.

So he smirked instead.

Preeeetty sure you threw the whole toolbox in there ()

They became Lessless.

“It wasn’t intentional!” a faraway voice muttered.

Luna agreed with FT on the whole “not quite dead yet” thing. “I’m feeling happyyyyyyyy!”

Only a hundred pages or so.

I actually tried once but fell asleep and gave up

AND SECRET WATER SQUIRTING CAPABILITIES

Bada-boooooooooom...

“Can... can I stand in your road?”

WITH GREEN POLKA DOTS

The blob exploded outwards in all directions, bits and pieces of sticky goop flying everywhere. Luna, who somehow managed to avoid getting drenched by the blast, cocked her head sideways at Nameless. “How long... never mind. Are you ok?”

What have I created...

lowercaseeeeeee

A new label was added to its wrapper- “Extra Protein”.

But A.C.’s blood looked odd. Different, not entirely right. The color was off. Instead of a bright red, it was a light brown, nearly translucent. It flowed at an incredibly slow rate, in no hurry to get anywhere. The light of the orange sun seemed to almost set it ablaze, little sparkles of light dotting its entire surface. Had one dared to touch it, they would have found it to be rather sticky. His blood was gone, replaced with a substance far more sinister. Syrup.

MEEEEEEE

With a great slurping sound, the melting jelly beans pulled together, adding the egg goop to their essence. Beautiful colors swirled around, warring until they became an ugly brown. Their white tattoos changed their lettering to say “protein bites”. The once unique candies had joined together to create one big monotonous confection. They had become something far, far worse. For now it had a disguise. It sprouted a wrapper not quite as shiny as that of its brethren, made of the absorbed shell- a big stamp on its papery surface declared that the new packaging was “environmentally friendly”. A second marking proclaimed in big gold letters that it was now “healthy”. Such a statement was, of course, untrue. But due to the added egg matter, there was no one to stop them from saying it. No one would care about how it tasted or looked, so long as it was supposedly good for them. Such a warrior would be the perfect choice for infiltrating enemy ranks. None would suspect them of any ill intentions- their marketing team was far too careful to let any hint slip out that could ruin their facade. The first enemy spy was born. Ahhhh why do I want to write so much about this

But in an adorable way!

They are birds smart enough to have a conversation with! They have the intelligence of a three year old, can do simple math, and love to play pranks! They can imitate practically any sound near perfectly, and they speak to people in their own voices! They are also storming cute! I’d suggest looking up a video of one!

But the slaughter of a single potato could do nothing to stop the massive slaughter that was coming. Far away (yet not far enough) a massive army began to rise in the sugar cane fields of the horrible land of Dextrosia. Legion upon legion of sugary beasts surfaced from bubbling pools of artificial flavorings. At first they appeared to be nothing more than little globs of food coloring, writhing pitifully upon the ground of used silver wrappers. But as they were exposed to the steaming clouds of chemicals that filled the atmosphere, sucking them into their gelatinous bodies with an awful squelching sound, they began to change shape. They crystalized, became more solid. Some grew outer shells so sour that just a single breath of their toxic fumes could leave even the nastiest zucchini immobilized, gasping for breath. Those would be the Warheads. Nasty things. Even their fellow fighters made sure to stay away from them. They had a tendency to... explode when they got upset. Or angry. Or sad. Or mildly perturbed. Other blobs grew into smaller forms. Not a single one was the same color as the next, different patterns covering their skins, but somehow they all managed to keep the same shape. Despite their differences, it was near impossible to tell them apart. The powdery white tattoos on their sides- reading the ever fearsome words “Jelly Belly”- certainly didn’t help matters. These warriors none could predict, for each had a different taste and way of destruction. Each, however, was equally lethal. A third group of sludge piles began to transform into massive, perfectly round balls of a material stronger than steel and heavier than the feeling of dropping ones ice cream cone into a gutter. They varied in size, the biggest brushing the cotton candy clouds which drifted high above. They rolled to and fro at random, occasionally crushing any unfortunate piece of candy that happened to be in their path. They either didn’t know or didn’t care. Such things were below them- both figuratively and literally. There were many more sorts of confections stalking about in the great crowd, but to simply list them all would take years. All that needs to be said is that they were dangerous. They were cruel. They were evil. And they were coming. I’ve got no clue where that came from.