Stick-"I am a stick!"
Doomslug-"I am a stick"
Argument continues for centuries until at the last minute, as the planet inevitably crashes into the sun the stick screams "I am fire!!!!"
If Sanderson wrote math textbooks it would take years to do a single lesson because the word problems alone would be hundreds of pages long complete with plot twists and the occasional Hoid appearance.
Also if he wrote a bird watchers guide everything would be chickens.