Kobold King
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You Know You're a Sanderfan When...
Kobold King replied to Shardbearer's topic in General Brandon Discussion
When you think the Eleventh Doctor should carry around a vial of the Eleventh Metal, thereby creating the elevenest eleven that ever elevened. -
True story: when I was a little kobold, I saw WAFFLE HOUSEs in two different parts of town. Believing I was not old enough to understand that the same franchise could have two different buildings, my father told me that there was only one WAFFLE HOUSE, and that it wandered around town at night on a pair of giant mechanical legs. My point is, Funtimes could totally make that happen.
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Fanfiction of fanfiction? Awesome. There aren't even waffle houses in Oregon any more.
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That, I'm afraid, makes him essentially a carbon copy of CorpseMaker. It'd be best to make him a bit more unique, I think. In addition I think players should be able to create their own characters, rather than be made to choose from a list of pre-generated Epics.
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Agreed. Our threads are usually centered around a single intriguing concept, with Epics and other characters added afterwards. The Dalles was conceived of as a military town run by vanillas. Corvallis was conceived of as an isolated Epic paradise. Astoria was conceived of as a battling ground for severely overpowered Epics, and Salem was conceived of as a literal Colosseum. The point is, an effective setting needs a good hook.
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What TwiLyght said, but I'd also add that these threads seem to do the best when there's a lot left for the other players to create and worldbuild for their own. Starting a thread with seventeen already-established Epics would be a hefty lore overload right from the onset, creating a stumbling block for players looking to join the thread. I like the ideas, it just doesn't quite work with the overall setting of Oregon or the unwritten guidelines of the RP.
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Speaking as someone who adores Celestia and Luna enough to have this as his current desktop background... ...The feels are strong with this video.
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"I'm like a guy vaporizing bullets!" "I fixed your broken computer, like a guy who can heal himself gifting his power to another guy who can't!" "It's cramped in here--feels like being squished in a tiny force field."
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And Regalia is an evil older Mizzy from the mirrorverse! HAIL VOIDUS, NEW THEORYMASTER OF THE FORUM
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Or...
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Evidently Steelheart lived a more interesting life than had been previously assumed.
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"What... what is he doing down there?" "Floating, obviously. And reading." "But why? Can't he read his book somewhere else? And doesn't he live halfway across the country?" "You shouldn't question his ways." "Oh, I'm gonna question his ways like you wouldn't believe. Hey Steelheart! Get your own light and stop reading under our museum!" "You can't make me! You're not like, my mom, man!" ... Go easy on me I didn't get much sleep last night.
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Like casting pears before whines? Because Lucentia wouldn't appreciate being pelted with fruit? Also, only now do I realize how much the forum needs an Epic mime.
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It was supposed to be a humorous deconstruction of the typical saying, but I couldn't find a suitable word that rhymed with "swine" and I forgot to change "pears" back to "pearls." So... sort of a typo?
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There's also this 3d art of her a Sharder did a while back. It's pretty close to the canonical description, though I think baring her midriff was purely artistic license on the artist's part. And of course, I couldn't call myself an Oregon RPer if I didn't bring up the official Reckoners RPG ponified Megan:
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Alas, with their lack of knowledge of the flighty Nathan, giving them this taste of insanity would be like casting pears before swine.
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I think Calamity usually leaves his Epics alone to manifest their corruption in whatever ways are natural to them. Sometimes that means dressing to impress, sometimes that means mutating towns of vanillas into dread-legions of samurai pandamen. Epics are a diverse lot. There are also probably Epics who deliberately dress to emphasize their powers. For instance, I could imagine shapeshifters who give themselves thinner figures and larger bust to show off what they can do. (Or making themselves look like attractive celebrities, like Taylor Swift.) And there are also probably Epics like Cricket, who wears her short shorts in all kinds of weather as a way of drawing attention to her one and only power. ...Though hopefully there aren't a lot of Epics like her, 'cuz on occasion she's murdered guys she caught staring at her thighs. No, you're thinking of Fortuity's. Not a lot of people know that Fortuity had a secret crush on his server--don't tell anyone.
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I feel like this is the sort of thing someone should ask Brandon at some point, but I'd feel awkward about being the one to bring it up. Out of unrelated curiosity, does Funtimes sleep in her prom dress, or does she make herself a set of a whimsical pajamas every night?
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That's currently where I'm leaning with this theory. As for skimpy clothing, I think that depends a lot on the individual Epic in question and how her corruption manifests. Funtimes wants to draw eyes to herself, but would rather people consider her to be fun than sexy. So she wears a bright pink glittery prom dress which, last I checked, didn't have holes cut out for her cleavage or navel. On the other hand, she-Epics that want to shock or show off their attractiveness would lean towards the skimpier clothing, just like the wearers of some more outrageous pieces of clothing in the pre-Calamity world. Or there might be a few cases where clothing that isn't all-covering is practical for them, such as bikini-clad water Epics or speed Epics that run around in small tank tops to stay cool. Epics are a varied bunch, so I imagine there are examples of pretty much any kind of behavior.
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Just for fun, let's see how this theory would apply to WHIO if correct. Doctor Funtimes is small of stature, extremely slim, and unquestionably cute. This could suggest how she's historically seen herself--as a small but innocent daughter under the thumb of a stormy mother. She doesn't see herself as a good empress so much as she sees herself as Tiny Tim, the adorable victim of circumstance. Scribbler is much the same; she is exceptionally short for her age, and aside from her tattoos is quite plain in appearance. This reflects her feelings of powerlessness and weakness. Quite to the contrary, Lucentia and Saccharine are both statuesque and majestic Epics, tall and regal in appearance. Lucentia sees herself as a sharp-witted but beautiful queen, and Saccharine seems to see herself as a scientific hero. Timeport hasn't changed in appearance in the slightest, because he already saw himself as the perfect predator, already deserving of god-like powers. Unlike Steelheart, he saw no reason that he should have to change to reflect his new Epic status, and thus, didn't. Granted, the theory doesn't really apply to Altermind or Lightwards. The former projects a constant illusion of himself to show what he feels he should actually look like, while he should already look like this projection if this theory is correct. And Lightwards sees himself as the glorious future Emperor of the Universe, and yet is an unattractive cross between Harry Potter and Indiana Jones. Personally I'm only half-convinced that my theory holds water when applied to canon, and if it does it may be that only some Epics have their appearances or physiques changed. Still though, it's interesting to think about.
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I think Epics are more like the Returned of the Cosmere--they become what they see themselves as. Regalia sees herself as venerable and wise, and has fully accepted the fact that she's soon to die. So she looks like the ancient crone senior citizen that she is. Newton isn't particularly attractive because she never saw herself as particularly attractive. In her fear of never reaching parental expectations, she modeled herself as a punk chick of average appearance... and Calamity solidified that appearance. Steelheart saw himself as a giant among men even before Calamity, seeing others as smaller and weaker than himself. When Calamity made him literally stronger than anyone else he could ever meet, it also made him literally taller and more imposing. It'd be interesting to know whether people who knew Epics before their Rendings notice any major differences in their appearances after they become Epics. Another question for the FUNTIMES list, perhaps?
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One day while he was meeting with Lucentia He had a hat "My bowler hat!" He wore it high upon his head so proudly An elegant hat "My bowler hat!" A hat that like just makes him feel so grandly Now fancy this And fancy that. The splendor of his hat in all its majesty "Like Steelheart! In an epic cap!" "I feel so swell and powerful in my hat "I bet Portlanders fear me just for that!" A hat as this, a hat as that, a hat so fine, a bowler haaaaat! "Oh golly Queen Lucentia, now what do you think of that?"
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Big Al, obviously. He's the hero we need, but not the one we deserve.
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That reminds me that I still haven't made a PMV of "Larry's High Silk Hat" about Lightwards' bowler.
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Darn it, Twi! If you mix cuteness and insanity too well I won't be able to fond fitting mood music.
