Bookish Ocelot she/her Posted March 17, 2019 Posted March 17, 2019 (edited) Add your own! Kaladin and Adolin start dating Shallan lightweaves herself a boyfriend Renarin and Rushu and Navani invent sliced bread and the wheel Adolin accidentally resurrects Sadeas Sadeas conquers all of Roshar and unites them under the Iron Throne Sadeas realizes his true Calling is to unite Westeros instead and leaves Rock and Lopen start a restaurant called the One-Armed Herdazian Lift eats tons of chouta and farms stormlight at the OAH The economy collapses due to the aforementioned farming Moash becomes a Highprince but then goes to Reshi Isles because that was hard work and he wants a vacation Venli becomes a full willshaper and makes statues of Eshonai everywhere The Parshendi decide that the whole war thing was a bad idea and go to OAH to eat pancakes The Parshendi get into a pancake eating contest with Lift and lose The Parshendi go massively into debt due to contest Debt starts another war Edited March 19, 2019 by BookishOcelot 2
Lunamor she/her Posted March 17, 2019 Posted March 17, 2019 15 minutes ago, BookishOcelot said: Rock and Lopen start a restaurant called the One-Armed Herdazian I believe that it is actually called “The Happy Inquisitor”. 1
Karger he/him Posted March 17, 2019 Posted March 17, 2019 (edited) Alright the wheel already exists on Roshar they talk about carts too. I assume that this means that this thread is for ridiculous theories so here goes. Rock and family's restaurant chain becomes so popular among parshendi that they decide not to go to war with humans who created such fine cuisine. Parshmen discover lawyerform and refuse to work with Odium unless he ups their pension and lowers the retirement age. Edited March 17, 2019 by Karger 2
Lunamor she/her Posted March 17, 2019 Posted March 17, 2019 3 minutes ago, BookishOcelot said: Lunamor, I am offend. I started an RP where I own a restaurant called the Happy Inquisitor.
Unhinged he/him Posted March 17, 2019 Posted March 17, 2019 30 minutes ago, Karger said: Parshmen discover lawyerform and refuse to work with Odium unless he ups their pension and lowers the retirement age. Odium throws them out of his organisation and goes back to using humans there are enough villains in the story already without adding lawyers to the mix 6
Scion of the Mists Posted March 20, 2019 Posted March 20, 2019 There are already numerous predictions threads. It's helpful to do a quick search before making a new topic to see if you can add to an existing one. It helps keep the forums clean.
Bookish Ocelot she/her Posted March 20, 2019 Author Posted March 20, 2019 (edited) @Scion of the Mists This thread is intended for satirical predictions. It isn’t serious, so I kept it separate. And more theories: The Parshmen are angered at being removed from the stories and come back in PaulBlartMallCopForm, complete with segways. Navani, under pressure of the war with the MallCopForm Parshendi, invents something new and unheard of. The tricycle The tricycle revolutionizes Alethi warfare. There is no need for horses now Factories are built as parts for tricycles are soulcast in massive amounts Shallan lightweaves another boyfriend because she didn't have nearly enough drama in her life Adolin breaks up with Kaladin because of an argument about streamer placement on tricycles. Kaladin runs away to Braize, where there is nobody to criticize his love of streamers. Edited March 21, 2019 by BookishOcelot 1
The Ryshadium Posted March 21, 2019 Posted March 21, 2019 1. Moash somehow takes up the shard of Honor. 2. Kaladin freaks out and stabs Moash in the eye. 3. Adolin nods approvingly. 1
Karger he/him Posted May 24, 2019 Posted May 24, 2019 Adolin will set up Kaladin on a date(need to see). Jasnah will make a great speech of historical significance. 2
ebfritz Posted May 24, 2019 Posted May 24, 2019 (edited) Stick takes control of the world and turns Shallan into fire. Edited August 10, 2019 by ebfritz Incorrect spelling 3
SwordNimiForPresident the sword/that sword Posted May 24, 2019 Posted May 24, 2019 Each of Shallan's personalities take up different Shards and then go to war with each other. Spoilers for other Cosmere works Spoiler Kelsier shows up and wins the war in one day. SA 5 is actually MB Era 3 book 1. Raoden shows up and wins the war in one hour. SA 5 is actually Elantris book 2.
Use the Falchion Posted May 24, 2019 Posted May 24, 2019 9 hours ago, SwordNimiForPresident said: Each of Shallan's personalities take up different Shards and then go to war with each other. The twist being that Shallan THOUGHT she took up different Shards, but in reality they were just different aspects/avatars of Autonomy. All of Adolin's ex-girlfriends show up Shallan's baby shower. Shallan blushes. WoT spoilers: Spoiler Wit and Rand have a conversation when Kaladin and Dalinar show up and they all wait for Jon Snow to arrive. Odium decides emotions are too troublesome and becomes Apathy. Honor is resurrected by Syl, effectively becoming her own grandparent. Cultivation is killed by Dalinar in a freak accident and is taken up by Lift, who decides to rename herself the Awesome Gardener. 3
Necessary Eagle she/her Posted May 24, 2019 Posted May 24, 2019 Lift extends Wyndle's repertoire to include sporks, spoons, chopsticks, and a replica of Dalinar's pork-knife. 1
Bookish Ocelot she/her Posted May 24, 2019 Author Posted May 24, 2019 Lift makes friends with Murtagh, who lends her Mr. Stabby.
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