Spilling my Guts (because I forgot to before)

[Taeshi Vei]

When I first joined the 17th Shard, I didn't know how everything worked and so I hadn't known that we were supposed to create an introductory topic.  I'll just post what I have on my "about me" page.  I'm hesitant to put this in a place where people are even more likely to read through it, but once you do, you'll see how I think through things, kind of.

I've learned that the more you learn about yourself, the more there is to know, and I'm at that age where kids have a hard time with that.  Think what you will about this, and I'll try my best not to care if you don't like this.

*****

I'm a redhead reader, writer, and artist.  I'm not the kind of person who will spend much time on any social-media related thing, but I am probably the biggest sanderfan of my school in Rexburg, and everyone who knows me knows that.  I feel like I'm out of place, here in the Seventeenth Shard, simply because so many people are competitive in trying to prove that they're the biggest fan.

I hope that, in the future, I can talk to Brandon about some things, but the thing is, just about anyone here might want the exact same thing, and it wouldn't really be fair.  I'm a young writer, not near the level I wish I was, but at the level and age where I have a pretty good start, with pretty good chances of quick-enough improvement to get into Brandon Sanderson's BYU classes.  I'm a mormon.

I don't have a very story-like life, mind you.  However, I have developed my own fantasy-ish thought process, where I can make myself act that way and realistically think that I have these ... aspects.  This is before I read Legon, and Brandonalways seems to already have used the creative things I come up with.  Anyway, I have seven aspects, or personalities, each with their own personality.  I don't imagine them inside or outside of me, they're just ... my thoughts and actions.  They share one body - me - and their different personalities often contradict one another (Have you ever seen Inside Out?), but they have made loose amends.  There's Deldri, Charole, Terri, Anera, Rann, Leby, and Sift.

I use their existence to explain how my thoughts work, and why I think in such different ways depending on the situation.  If you do mind me explaining each of them, don't read this.  I'm going to write it as if it were their uncoordinatedly combined thoughts critiquing each others' existance.  So when I say "us," that's the same thing as saying "I."  Yes, that sounds strange as I type it.

*****

Deldri - She's every bit a nerd, enjoying programing, reading, writing, drawing, learning, etc.  She likes to plan and organize things, and she can easily figure out how things work.  She likes teachers.  Brandon Sanderson is her absolute role model.

Charole - Charole is gloomy, and is unpredictable when it comes to emotion.  She'll hold it in and think about it the wrong ways, in twisted ways.  Paradoxical thoughts is what she calls them.  She knows that she doesn't make sense, but thinks about the whole world as what we perceive to be the wrong way.  We have to try and shut her out and sadly, she helps with that.  She's superstitious, which helps us in some cases, and she likes color, which we think is cool.

Terri - She's devotedly religious and wants progress in life.  She's good at setting goals, and it's up to all of us to try hard to reach them.  She's frustrated because online classes aren't working out for us, and school in general is easier for her and Deldri when it comes to school.  She's the one that's most like a conscience to us.  She, along with Deldri and Anera like minimalism.  We don't own much in our small, clean room.

Anera - She's a tomboy, as athletic as we get.  She encourages exercise and acts small, slightly cold, in big, extroverted groups of people. She loves her bike, and works with Terri when it comes to preparedness.  We have a backpack in our room that contains everything we would need and want incase of a fire, and we take that with us if there is even a small chance of getting kidnapped while biking through town and things.  We also have our D&D and MTG stuff in there, for when we bike to the gamestore to meet up with friends.  Also, Anera loves the outdoors.

Rann - Rann likes netflix.  She's a (sometimes casual) geek of anything awesome, not just sanderstuff.  She has that snacking temptation that we have to snuff out, and loves our monstrously oversized comfortable jacket.  She likes to listen to audiobooks but hates music.  Yes, music is not for us, especially not for her.  She's grudgingly fine with the fact that Terri likes piano and orchestra music.

Leby - Ugh (sorry Leby).  She causes a lot of trouble, socially.  She thinks that abnormal behavior is cool, but she wants people to liker.  She exaggerates to impress people and self-diagnoses us random things.  We still like her, though, she's a small girl who's a happy optimist.

Sift - She knows that she's awesome, in a mixed-up way.  She doesn't care.  Unlike Leby, she doesn't try to impress others, only herself.  She's the one who started all of our invisible friends, and preferred playing alone as a child.  She absolutely loves cats and has a bow and arrow just 'cause, even though we can't use one very well.  She doesn't ever feel the need to talk to people.

*****

So, that's me/us.  This hopefully explains why I'm weird the way I am, and why I explain myself in different ways to different people.  These aspects are me, and those who know me will see that this fits.  Now that I have explained my life, you can choose to not like me, while knowing that Charole and Sift will help me not to care.  I'm thinking of somehow writing a unique book that contains all of that, how I see things.  Discovering my aspects has helped me tremendously in my life, even if they're not actually real.  So, yah.

[Taeshi Vei]

If anyone else wants to share things, that would make me more comfortable, having this here.

[Ammanas]

Welcome! The people on the 17th shard are some of the most welcoming out there and what you consider each of us trying to prove we are the "biggest fan" I think is each of us trying to convince the others of the "correct" interpretation of information; it all seems to be in good fun in my opinion. I went to the univerity in Rexburg for several years and graduated; I have mostly good memories. You seem somewhat embarrassed in having several personalities? I think everyone is like that to one degree or another (although I have not given them names ). You seem like a nice enough person; I hope you stick around and keep posting on the shard!

[Dragon.of.Stone]

Hi, @Runeweaver.  I'm not really going to share my story; I'm not comfortable with that.  I did see your art, though, on one of your first posts.  You're amazing!  You mentioned that you do portraits of people.  Do you think you could do one of my friend?  It still is $30, right?

[Rebecca]

It's so good to meet you @Runeweaver! I'm from Rexburg too, and will be going into 10th grade this fall. This will be my first year going to school there since I just recently moved. (I'm also Mormon). I hope to see more of you at here at the shard!

Edited August 1, 2017 by Rebecca

[Daydam]

Welcome @Runeweaver!

About the various personalities, I do exactly the same to explain myself, though I only have three different aspects:

• Daydam has a lot of things to do but is too afraid of failure to ever do anything. Though I hate that, he is the dreamer one, the has the imagination, the ideas, the objectives. He is friendly, but really shy. He's also really sensitive, but the other personalities don't let him show it. 
• Kryden has a cold and logical personality (good thing since as a producer my job requires me to be like that a lot). He sees Daydam's ideas, finds the problems and obstacles to consider, and looks for a way to solve them. The bad thing is, if he has too much work to do, Daydam starts trying to stop him saying "this is going to fail". His logic doesn't only apply to work: Kryden is obsessed with understanding everything, even feelings. Because of that, he's spent years faking emotions and analyzing how people behave when they feel some way in particular, to learn how to behave himself. He firmly believes that emotions and reasoning are just really quick and complex calculations based on our experience.
• Erin is... well, I could say she's my own Ruin, a voice constantly speaking at the back of my head, telling me that everyone's going to betray me, that feelings are nothing but a weakness, and that I'm going to fail at life no matter what I do. What's really weird is I need her. Kryden is the result of the constant clash between Daydam and Erin, and even though he is extremely logical, he can sometimes fall under Daydam's fear of failure. That's when Erin can prove useful: she doesn't care about anything or anyone. If she has an objective, she does whatever has to be done in order to succeed.

I have a question: how and when did you start seeing yourself as all those characters? i.e. I love writing, and I try to put a bit of me in all of my main characters. That's how Erin came to be, 4 or 5 years ago, analyzing myself to find the worst part of me (in that moment I hadn't even realised how much I needed her). After that, Daydam came naturally as her pure opposite, and Kryden appeared 2 years ago, in a subtle way, slowly quieting Erin, controlling her most of the time.

I hope you have an awesome time at the Shard!

Edited August 1, 2017 by Daydam

[Sami]

Wow that is a pretty awesome personality there! I'm not so interesting - I haven't thought of myself as having different aspects before, but its super interesting to think about. I tend to be pretty different around different people, when one side of me is more sensitive, worries about how people see me, and is very friendly and warm, where another side of me tends to be more quiet, cold, and very thick-skinned when it comes to insults (going both ways). The best thing to bring me out when I'm in the latter mode is to discuss one of my fandoms - Brandon Sanderson, Marvel Movies, or just books and movies in general   

Edited August 1, 2017 by Sami

[Taeshi Vei]

@Sami You'd probably get along with the Rann part of me.

@Daydam Your personalities are darker than mine, I think.  Just let your other personalities fight against the dark parts, but still encourage the good personalities.  Example: The way I was introduced to Brandon's good books (I had read some of Alcatraz) was that my dad is a huge fan, but he'd be too quiet to be on the 17th Shard.  Anyway, my family owns some of Brandon's books, and when I was younger, I'd go and look at how pretty the covers were, how many colors and swirls there were.  So, I started with Elantris and loved it.  I've been a sanderfan since, because of Charole who loves well-made paintings and things.  I do love drawing, painting, and I'm going into a graphic design class this year.

[Daydam]

@Runeweaver the only dark one is Erin, to be honest. Kryden may be cold, but he is just trying to understand the world he lives in, though sometimes he feels like he doesn't belong. He's actually the reason why I got into Brandon Sanderson: the complex magic system in Mistborn, and the way physics applied to it, made Kryden feel like he had to read the books, and learn more about the rules of Allomancy.

[Taeshi Vei]

Yah ... do you you think you might have other aspects that you haven't discovered yet?  And also, how do they interact with each other?

For mine, I'm never "in" one aspect at one time (maybe except Charole, because she can turn everything the other aspects say to her around), so it's always a mix, and some of my personality traits come from a mix of my aspects.  I imagine them having conversations with each other, or when I think about situations that could happen in my life, I imagine which aspect(s) would handle it best.

[Taeshi Vei]

@Dragon.of.Stone So you like art?  I might be able to do something for you.  I'll send you some messages and tell you more.

@Rebecca That's so cool!  I'm going to be a sophomore too this year!  I'm starting a writing circle with some of my friends, if you like to write.

 

[Rebecca]

That's really cool @Runeweaver! I actually do enjoy writing, though I'm not very good at it. 

[Gavin-son-son-Odegard]

22 hours ago, Runeweaver said:

When I first joined the 17th Shard, I didn't know how everything worked and so I hadn't known that we were supposed to create an introductory topic.  I'll just post what I have on my "about me" page.  I'm hesitant to put this in a place where people are even more likely to read through it, but once you do, you'll see how I think through things, kind of.

I've learned that the more you learn about yourself, the more there is to know, and I'm at that age where kids have a hard time with that.  Think what you will about this, and I'll try my best not to care if you don't like this.

*****

I'm a redhead reader, writer, and artist.  I'm not the kind of person who will spend much time on any social-media related thing, but I am probably the biggest sanderfan of my school in Rexburg, and everyone who knows me knows that.  I feel like I'm out of place, here in the Seventeenth Shard, simply because so many people are competitive in trying to prove that they're the biggest fan.

I hope that, in the future, I can talk to Brandon about some things, but the thing is, just about anyone here might want the exact same thing, and it wouldn't really be fair.  I'm a young writer, not near the level I wish I was, but at the level and age where I have a pretty good start, with pretty good chances of quick-enough improvement to get into Brandon Sanderson's BYU classes.  I'm a mormon.

I don't have a very story-like life, mind you.  However, I have developed my own fantasy-ish thought process, where I can make myself act that way and realistically think that I have these ... aspects.  This is before I read Legon, and Brandonalways seems to already have used the creative things I come up with.  Anyway, I have seven aspects, or personalities, each with their own personality.  I don't imagine them inside or outside of me, they're just ... my thoughts and actions.  They share one body - me - and their different personalities often contradict one another (Have you ever seen Inside Out?), but they have made loose amends.  There's Deldri, Charole, Terri, Anera, Rann, Leby, and Sift.

I use their existence to explain how my thoughts work, and why I think in such different ways depending on the situation.  If you do mind me explaining each of them, don't read this.  I'm going to write it as if it were their uncoordinatedly combined thoughts critiquing each others' existance.  So when I say "us," that's the same thing as saying "I."  Yes, that sounds strange as I type it.

*****

Deldri - She's every bit a nerd, enjoying programing, reading, writing, drawing, learning, etc.  She likes to plan and organize things, and she can easily figure out how things work.  She likes teachers.  Brandon Sanderson is her absolute role model.

Charole - Charole is gloomy, and is unpredictable when it comes to emotion.  She'll hold it in and think about it the wrong ways, in twisted ways.  Paradoxical thoughts is what she calls them.  She knows that she doesn't make sense, but thinks about the whole world as what we perceive to be the wrong way.  We have to try and shut her out and sadly, she helps with that.  She's superstitious, which helps us in some cases, and she likes color, which we think is cool.

Terri - She's devotedly religious and wants progress in life.  She's good at setting goals, and it's up to all of us to try hard to reach them.  She's frustrated because online classes aren't working out for us, and school in general is easier for her and Deldri when it comes to school.  She's the one that's most like a conscience to us.  She, along with Deldri and Anera like minimalism.  We don't own much in our small, clean room.

Anera - She's a tomboy, as athletic as we get.  She encourages exercise and acts small, slightly cold, in big, extroverted groups of people. She loves her bike, and works with Terri when it comes to preparedness.  We have a backpack in our room that contains everything we would need and want incase of a fire, and we take that with us if there is even a small chance of getting kidnapped while biking through town and things.  We also have our D&D and MTG stuff in there, for when we bike to the gamestore to meet up with friends.  Also, Anera loves the outdoors.

Rann - Rann likes netflix.  She's a (sometimes casual) geek of anything awesome, not just sanderstuff.  She has that snacking temptation that we have to snuff out, and loves our monstrously oversized comfortable jacket.  She likes to listen to audiobooks but hates music.  Yes, music is not for us, especially not for her.  She's grudgingly fine with the fact that Terri likes piano and orchestra music.

Leby - Ugh (sorry Leby).  She causes a lot of trouble, socially.  She thinks that abnormal behavior is cool, but she wants people to liker.  She exaggerates to impress people and self-diagnoses us random things.  We still like her, though, she's a small girl who's a happy optimist.

Sift - She knows that she's awesome, in a mixed-up way.  She doesn't care.  Unlike Leby, she doesn't try to impress others, only herself.  She's the one who started all of our invisible friends, and preferred playing alone as a child.  She absolutely loves cats and has a bow and arrow just 'cause, even though we can't use one very well.  She doesn't ever feel the need to talk to people.

*****

So, that's me/us.  This hopefully explains why I'm weird the way I am, and why I explain myself in different ways to different people.  These aspects are me, and those who know me will see that this fits.  Now that I have explained my life, you can choose to not like me, while knowing that Charole and Sift will help me not to care.  I'm thinking of somehow writing a unique book that contains all of that, how I see things.  Discovering my aspects has helped me tremendously in my life, even if they're not actually real.  So, yah.

Hi there @Runeweaver and welcome to 17th shard.

The way you define these different aspects of yourself is really cool and makes for a great and insightful read. I mean I think of there being different aspects to my personality too but I've never went as far as defining them as clearly as you have and giving them names. 

I think it's only fair that I share a little bit more about myself, considering how much you shared. Let's see...I'm 25, have a Master's degree in Games Programming, love everything fantasy. I'm a generally shy person. Not great with socializing. Aside from obviously being a big Sanderfan,  I'm also a huge Harry Potter fan, as well as Lord of the Rings and ASOIAF/Game of Thrones. Vampires are my favorite fantasy beings. 

Oh and I'm a writer as well, been working on a dark fantasy novel for a few years now. 

I'm agnostic. Huge cat person, big animal lover in general but cats, they have special place in my heart. 

And well that's it for now. Feel free to ask if you want to know more.

Oh and once again welcome

 

[Taeshi Vei]

@Gavin-son-son-Odegard Cool.  I'm a big cat person, too.  I have two cats, one an old black-and-white tomcat that I've had since my childhood (he's curled up next to me right now), and a brown, speckled she-cat who keeps on having kittens before my parents can fix her.

Spoiler

 

[Gavin-son-son-Odegard]

2 hours ago, Runeweaver said:

@Gavin-son-son-Odegard Cool.  I'm a big cat person, too.  I have two cats, one an old black-and-white tomcat that I've had since my childhood (he's curled up next to me right now), and a brown, speckled she-cat who keeps on having kittens before my parents can fix her.

  Hide contents

 

They're so cute! My heart's melting. I don't have a cat at the moment, and I really want to, I miss having cats around, but can't afford to take care of a pet at the moment.  

 

 

 

Edited August 1, 2017 by Gavin-son-son-Odegard

[CarolaDavar]

Hi  @Runeweaver ,

I love what you have done with your personality here. I have been trying to do something similar, but since ei only started thinking of it  recently, it isn't very organized yet.

Anyways, I hope yI have fun here on the shard and we are all glad to have you!

[Dragon.of.Stone]

Okay, @Runeweaver, how were you able to get a nice profile picture?  I haven't been able to upload one; it always says that the files are too big.

[Taeshi Vei]

I took a background image (it's a hobby of mine to collect and sort images) and put it on paint to crop it.  Cropping things on paint won't add any extra space in the image's file, unlike with some picture-editing programs.

[Dragon.of.Stone]

I collect images, too.  Mostly art.  I can't try that on my laptop because it doesn't have paint, but when I can get on a real computer, I'll do that.  Can you tell me about how you collect and sort the pictures?

[Taeshi Vei]

I use google drive, plus my phone because I've a really nice app that has a new background daily.  Uh, can't find my phone.  I'll tell you what the app is later.  I mostly sort art, too.  I've 200+ images on drive, and 150+ on my phone.  I'll tell you more about it through messages here, if you want.

[Tesh]

On 7/31/2017 at 2:36 PM, Ammanas said:

You seem like a nice enough person; I hope you stick around and keep posting on the shard!

@Runeweaver Is a VERY nice person. She's a great person to be around and I wish I could spend more time with her and her family. (They live about an 11 hour car drive away. But I went to girls camp with her and her sister about three weeks ago! It was awesome)! 

But I probably have three personalities.

1. That girl who sits in the front of the class, always paying the utmost attention to the teacher, raising her hand at almost every single question.
2. That girl (I can't think of anything else to start with) sitting alone in a corner immersed in a big book.
3. That girl at lunch who can't stop talking, laughing, and smiling.

There probably are some others, but I don't want to list them at the moment. 

And @Runeweaver, you should join the Surgefinders! (There's a link in @Sami's signature. I haven't had time to add it to mine). 

[Tesh]

On 8/1/2017 at 11:33 AM, Runeweaver said:

@Gavin-son-son-Odegard Cool.  I'm a big cat person, too.  I have two cats, one an old black-and-white tomcat that I've had since my childhood (he's curled up next to me right now), and a brown, speckled she-cat who keeps on having kittens before my parents can fix her.

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Is that Twinkle?