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Posted

I couldn't sleep. So I wrote a thing.

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This is the thing in its entirety, completely unchanged from when I wrote it.

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As the title suggests, I had very little sleep when I wrote this. So it's probably bad.Β Have at the thing. Rip into it, tear it to shreds, or paint it with rainbow colors. Just tell me what you think. :)

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Here it is:

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Music is amazing. There's nothing like a collection of random notes -- perhaps with words, perhaps not -- that causes a powerful reaction. And there is a rich and interesting history involved, too. Music's evolution is as interesting as that of society and humankind itself. What started as essentially humming in Latin grew and progressed. Soon instruments were invented, and they too grew in complexity. Crude drums, then basic fiddles. Orchestras were formed. Great minds composed great music, and still it grew. A greater variety of stringed instruments appeared. New genres, toom. Jazz and big band, then rock and roll, and now, electronic music that can be both calming and exiting.

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Whatever the style, whatever the means used, music is a wonder and a work of art.

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But even with all that's been said above, there's still a hidden side to it all.

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Magic.

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I'm not talking about the effect it has on emotions, I'm talking real magic, the kind that can levitate objects and allow flight, the kind that can build an empire, the kind that can kill with a single poetic turn of phrase.

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And I'm one of those magicians.

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The name's Atticus. Atticus Potter. I'm an Orchestrator in the King's Court. Basically, I'm His Royal Majesty's problem-solvers, an advisor, that sort of thing. Basically it means I do all his dirty work. I'm not complaining, though -- the pay's good, and it keeps me off the streets. That's all that matters at the moment.

Posted

Really well written and itΒ madeΒ an easy read.

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Here's some of myΒ thoughts as I read:

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"Music. I like music"

"Latin...that means it's set in our world."

"Drums. Jazz. Rock and Roll. Electro. So it's set in our era."

"Secret magic...i like secretΒ magic."

"He's a magician and name is Potter....hmmmmm, how original."

"Kings Court? I don't know any King'sΒ Court nowadays. So it must not be set in our era or our world. Or maybe it's an alternative history. I'm confused."

Posted

Really well written and itΒ madeΒ an easy read.

Β 

Here's some of myΒ thoughts as I read:

Β 

"Music. I like music"

"Latin...that means it's set in our world."

"Drums. Jazz. Rock and Roll. Electro. So it's set in our era."

"Secret magic...i like secretΒ magic."

"He's a magician and name is Potter....hmmmmm, how original."

"Kings Court? I don't know any King'sΒ Court nowadays. So it must not be set in our era or our world. Or maybe it's an alternative history. I'm confused."

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Yeah... I did mention that I wrote this at like 2 am while sleep deprived, right? Edit shall come. Thanks for the feedback; have a cookie!

Posted

Well, I'm intrigued! Great intro, I love the idea of a magic system built on music, and the voice of the character is very engaging. I'd love to read more!Β 

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I have to agree about the last name Potter, though. The name Atticus Potter sounds good, but when combined with the fact that he says he's a magician, it instantly make one think Harry Potter.Β 

Posted

Hmm.

My big point at the moment, regarding the Potter name, has already been said... Still, I'll think about this and get back to you. I've always like the idea of music as a kind of magic.

Posted

I did some edits. Thanks everybody! Now you get to shred this one.

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I just briefly revised this edition, so there are still holes and things, but one of these days I might turn it in to a book.

Β 

Music is amazing. There's nothing like a collection of random notes -- perhaps with words, perhaps not -- that causes a powerful reaction. And there is a rich and interesting history involved, too. Music's evolution is as interesting as that of society and humankind itself. What started as essentially humming in Latin grew and progressed. Soon instruments were invented, and they too grew in complexity. Crude drums, then basic fiddles. Orchestras were formed. Great minds composed great music, and still it grew. A greater variety of instruments appeared. New genres, too. Jazz and big band, then rock and roll. And now, electronic music that can be both calming and exiting.

Β 

Whatever the style, whatever the means used, music is a wonder and a work of art.

Β 

But even with all that's been said above, there's still a hidden side to it all.

Β 

Magic.

Β 

I'm not talking about the effect it has on emotions, I'm talking real magic, the kind that can levitate objects and allow flight, the kind that can build an empire, the kind that can kill with a single poetic turn of phrase.

Β 

And I'm one of those magicians.

Β 

The name's Brooke. John Brooke. I'm an Orchestrator in the United States Department of Magic. Basically, I'm a part of the magical verion of the Marines. It means we get to do all the President's dirty work for him. I'm not complaining, though -- the pay's good, and it keeps me off the streets. That's all that matters for the moment.

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This latest request, though, was pushing it.

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"Sir?" I asked. "You want me to do what?"

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President Winters turned from his desk. "It's simple, really. I need you and your team to go in and retrieve the docutments. Standard procedures."

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A million complaints ran through my head. I picked on that seemed the most rational, and didn't make it sound like I'd rather swim the English Channel in a straightjacket.

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"If it's standard, why can't a regular team do it? Surely we have enough of those lying around."

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The President smiled, as if he'd predicted my objection. "Consider this a trial run. We're considering expanding the number of magicians in the field. Your team was one of those we picked."

Posted

Spelled "straitjacket" wrong, but otherwise, you did an awesome job. You also sent me down a rabbit hole of escape artists and magic acts...:lol:

Posted

It sounds vaguely like the Harry Dresden Series.

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Also... Fill in the blanks.

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The name's B______. J_______ B______. :D

Posted (edited)

It sounds vaguely like the Harry Dresden Series.

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Also... Fill in the blanks.

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The name's B______. J_______ B______. :D

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Holy... I need to get some sleep.Β 

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But thanks, all, for the feedback anyways. :)

Edited by Slowswift
Posted

I like your writing style. It made for a fun read. Also, the idea of a magic system based on music. I like that. One question: what kind of magic does the music.... for lack of a better word, create? Does it depend on the style of music? Complexity? Rhythm? Does all music cause magical things to happen, or just some? Does it have to be made by a specific person? Or does it have to be made with the intent to create magic?

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That was much more than one question. Sorry.

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I'm thinking of posting some of my midnight rambles, but I'm afraid I'd be locked in the loony bin.

Posted

I like your writing style. It made for a fun read. Also, the idea of a magic system based on music. I like that. One question: what kind of magic does the music.... for lack of a better word, create? Does it depend on the style of music? Complexity? Rhythm? Does all music cause magical things to happen, or just some? Does it have to be made by a specific person? Or does it have to be made with the intent to create magic?

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That was much more than one question. Sorry.

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I'm thinking of posting some of my midnight rambles, but I'm afraid I'd be locked in the loony bin.

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Yes, it depends... I think. I'm still getting everything worked out. :) I'll get back to you. Thanks for the questions!

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Ah, it's fine. :D I can't get better without people critiquing.

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Go ahead. I about checked myself into the nuthouse after I realized all the goofs I'd made.

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