I've figured out what the Parshendi are singing

[Lightflame he/him]

Through methods involving the sacrifice of several people who didn't want to be sacrificed, I've decoded the song of the Parshendi. Read it here, and be amazed.

The Song:

"Hahaha!" the evil guys say.

"We shall kill Gavilar today.

We'll phone Szeth, that Shin in white.

He'll kill him dead in a big fight."

They thought his death was really rad.

But the Alethi were far from glad.

They went to exterminate a race,

By stabbing them all in the face.

Now this may sound awful rude,

But Brightlord Amaran is a bad dude.

He had Kaladin branded a slave,

When he thought that he wouldn't behave.

Kaladin had to hold some wood,

With some guys raised in the 'hood.

He learned their names and learned them well.

Their bloody deaths were mighty swell.

Dalinar went to the crazy lady,

To make a deal that some called shady.

She took memories of his wife,

And gave him back a paper knife.

Shallan's rage blew up her father.

"Oh," she thought. "What a bother."

She went to steal Jasnah's stuff,

Yet her prize was but a bluff.

Odium hated Tanavast's guts,

So he fed them to his mutts.

The he chucked the world off a big cliff,

And rocked out with a guitar riff.

Everyone got scared of the mean Voidbringers,

But that meant they forgot the Hoidbringers.

Nohadon wrote a big long book,

Which he then used to hit a crook.

Dalinar had visions of the past,

And he thought they were quite a blast,

But Adolin tied him to a chair,

When he turned Renarin into a bear.

The Mistress thought art lacked glamour,

So she smashed it with a hammer.

Is she Shalash? Maybe not?

Could be a new robot?

Highprince Sadeas got a bad rap,

When he led his pal into a trap.

But a nice man of lower class,

Went and saved Dalinar's........life.

If you want to learn about these things,

Then you should buy The Way of Kings.

Yes, it has all of this and more,

Get a copy at the store.

Amazing, isn't it?

[Observer]

+1. Just.....+1.

[PeterAhlstrom he/him]

A paper knife? (I haven't read the Night Angel trilogy.)

[Zenith]

I don't know either, but, this is awesome.

By the way, who was sacrificed?

[Observer]

Turned Renerian into a bear? Did I log into the Brave forums on accident?

Edited September 18, 2012 by Observer

[Glaring at the Survivor he/him]

Haha. So Peter, tell us: what did Dalinar ask for, and what did he get?

[Zenith]

I heard on odd theory that Renarin's weakness was his curse, and that his boon was forgetting his wife. However, we do know now that the curses and boons are limited in some ways, and I doubt that the Nightwatcher's power extends like that.

Besides, we all know a question like that's a RAFO just waiting to happen

[Straff Venture he/him]

I heard on odd theory that Renarin's weakness was his curse, and that his boon was forgetting his wife. However, we do know now that the curses and boons are limited in some ways, and I doubt that the Nightwatcher's power extends like that.

Besides, we all know a question like that's a RAFO just waiting to happen

That theory sounds pretty good, not only is it a really awesome plot twist but I remember in tWoK when Dalinar is talking to Navani and his sons about going to the Nightwatcher he pays particular attention to Renarin's reaction.

[Zenith]

Let's see if we can get some more hints at Dalinar's curse/boon, especially with the next book being focused on Shallan, who is near Jasnah, who is close to Dalinar.

That would be a really epic plot twist. We need plottwistspren!