Mental health club!

[echo74 she/her]

5 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*biggest hugs*

I'm in the same boat, girlie

AWW GLASS

*many hugs for you also*

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

1 minute ago, echo74 said:

AWW GLASS

*many hugs for you also*

*squeezes both*

What are your plans now, Echo?

[Existential]

8 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*biggest hugs*

I'm in the same boat, girlie

I already have hugs but *more hugs *

 

7 hours ago, echo74 said:

hey guys.

they sent me my byu decision today.

and i...

didn't get in.

i don't know why.

i don't know if it was something i did.

but im really sad about it.

and i could some hugs right now.

please

I’m sorry *hugs*

[MirkerLurker she/her]

 

2 hours ago, Thee insane said:

..

 .. this is why your my online mother.

*hugs*

Thanks for all that.

Sometimes I just need someone to write paragraphs on my rants. Thank you so much.

 

*hug* Anytime!

 

2 hours ago, alittleinsane said:

Right, so if I wasn't feeling a little bit tired and kinda just done with life today (my grandparents are again pressuring me to have a bat mitzvah, i'm like "aren't i too old??" and they're like "ehhh, it's ok!" and while I do respect their religion, I'm agnostic and I just wish they'd stop with it, I put up with coming over to their house for holidays, and observing major holidays at home, but I just don't want any coming-of-age-type ceremony) I would quote the things I'm addressing, but out of laziness, everyone remember these things!

1. You are valid no matter how true to yourself you feel at the moment!

2. If someone else's words make you hate yourself, know that they're wrong. Other people do not have the right to make you dislike yourself in any way, and if they do, then according to the judgement of the oratrice mechanique d'analyse cardinale, they're wrong!

3. you're amazing, i'm amazing, we're all amazing! the only thing that makes someone less amazing is if they tell someone else that they aren't amazing, so by default we're all amazing

4. hugs

ah yes hugs, a complete, clear, and grammatically correct statement

oh yeah i forgor almost but i have a vent

  Hide contents

Mkay so as background knowledge, i have two little sisters, one of which is 11. I will call her L, it's her first initial. Whatever I think I'm good at (physically), she's better. I'm not bad, it's just that she's better. Like girlie's out here jumping horses and i'm struggling to canter. And to literally add insult to injury, she has a tendency to call me weak and pathetic to my face whenever she's mad, which had predictable results. More background info, my mom cannot swim, and has almost drowned several times. Me, my sisters, and my dad love swimming. It's one of the only sports/physical activities I'm actually confident in. During Spring Break I was swimming in the sea with some friends, and it was later brought to my mom's attention that I was struggling to swim back to shore. Literally the ONE time that happened. And now she's like "swimming lessons!" and it was just instant hurt. Like y'all know in books when it's like "xxx felt stung?" WELL I FELT STUNG Y'ALL, LIKE A BOOK CHARACTER. Anyways, typical to me, I excuse myself five minutes later and go to cry quietly in a lump underneath the covers because I'm oh so mature. And I'm thinking that L's going to find out that mama wants me to do swimming lessons, and she's gonna bully me for it. I have on several occasions been bullied by my little sister. She's stronger, faster, and more irritable than me, and I'm VERY good at making people angry...and being a sensitive baby, but to be fair it escalated to her hitting me with one of the ropes for horses. And eventually my mom's like "you can't just use this as an excuse to stay lonely and miserable in your room, being depressed" and I'm like "mama ily but literally last summer you listed the reasons I clearly didn't have depression, while I was crying and telling you I didn't want to be alive anymore, but ok diva you go do that" and she's like "well maybe I was wrong." and that's what actually makes me less sad kinda, in an insane-laughing-while-being-stabbed way, cause you are TWO YEARS TOO LATE, in the depression-department, I am fine now. I think

 

Hmmmm
May I push back ever so slightly on your point #2? (And feel free to ignore or disagree. This may not be the time or place to make the point I'm going to make, but it's hard to tell that online. ...Storms, it's hard to tell that in person. So, sorry in advance if this isn't helpful right now.)

If someone's words make you hate yourself, ask (yourself) if that's what they were actually trying to do. 
Sometimes (not all the time) our brains are twisting what people say, and that's not what they meant. Sometimes they are trying to help, and doing a really awkward or actually-unhelpful job of it. 
I want people around me who I trust to offer...let's call it "constructive criticism", just like we would for writing or art. People who I trust will call me out if I'm screwing up and not realizing it, or hurting people and not realizing it, or letting my dark brain trick me into believing lies - I want people who will call that out, and help me do better. But I also know my own brain interprets any "criticism" as "they hate me" and "I'm a terrible person" and things like that.
I'm not trying to discredit your original point - you should never listen to people attempting to tear you down for the sake of tearing you down. Any criticism should always be checked first for accuracy. You have value, you are loved, and nothing anyone says can undo that. Absolutely on that.

As for the rant - *hug*
Just, hug. That sucks, and I'm sorry, so *hug*
 

1 hour ago, Thee insane said:

HUGS 

Storms that sucks. I feel like that sometimes with my siblings. But I've learned that your good in your own way.

If hearing others personal experience help here.

  Hide contents

My older sister is good at alot of things. One of which is singing. BEUTIFUL VOICE and gets so much attention cause of it. I am not the best singer but I think I do well until she pops up and sings better then I do. It sucks. My foster brother is a GREAT athlete. He can do any sport easy. I think I'm good at basketball then he 1v1s me and I lose horribly. My brother is a GENIUS. He is one of the smartest people I've ever met. I think I'm smart. At this point being smart is the only thing I've got. Then he comes around and outsmart me. I'm out of options. Everyone in our family is the best at something. My mom is a great caretaker and cook. I can't remotely cook or take care of people. My dad is a finance and that stuff wiz. I suck at that. I have nothing to be good at. But one thing. Friends. Ok. Friends is my thing, being funny, having a unique personality.

 

You have your thing you just need to find it. YOUR AWESOME!

If comforting words help read this one.

  Reveal hidden contents

Your awesome ok? I don't know to much about you but I think your great. Here is every reason why.

Your smart, you have many times shown intellect in many ways.

Your funny, whenever I'm sad and you say something funny jt brings a smile right to me.

Your kind, you have a huge heart that helps everyone.

Your pretty, I got a small description but I know your so pretty already.l.

You ride horses, that's its own reason cause horses are fun but I've never rid one before. 

If aggressiveness helps

  Reveal hidden contents

STOP THAT YOUR AWESOME OK! ANYONE WHO SAYS OTHERWISE IS THE WORST AND ILL PUNCH THEM! YOUR THE BESTEST EVER AND YOUR SISTER CAN SCREW OFF AND YOUR VALID YOUR BELEIFS ARE VALID YOUR LIFE IS VALID EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU IS VALID!

If there is anything else I can do to help lemme know   

Hey Hawks. Don't undervalue the skill of being there for someone.
It's not actually easy. And it's way more important than we tend to give it credit for.
It's hard, to sit with someone be unable to help. It's hard to not see any real effect from being there for someone. It's hard to feel like you're making a difference, and it's easy to think that "being a good friend" isn't an important skill, or a skill worth being proud of.

Other people can be great at singing, at basketball, at teaching, at art, at writing, at business management, at whatever. But if no one is there supporting them, encouraging them, and giving them the motivation and love to keep going, then none of that matters. If "all" (sarcasm) that you do well is support other people and love them well, that is SO MUCH.

[Keke They/he]

1 minute ago, MirkerLurker said:

Hey Hawks. Don't undervalue the skill of being there for someone.
It's not actually easy. And it's way more important than we tend to give it credit for.
It's hard, to sit with someone be unable to help. It's hard to not see any real effect from being there for someone. It's hard to feel like you're making a difference, and it's easy to think that "being a good friend" isn't an important skill, or a skill worth being proud of.

Other people can be great at singing, at basketball, at teaching, at art, at writing, at business management, at whatever. But if no one is there supporting them, encouraging them, and giving them the motivation and love to keep going, then none of that matters. If "all" (sarcasm) that you do well is support other people and love them well, that is SO MUCH.

Yeah. That's one thing I KNOW. I may not be able to knock your socks off with singing or dunk on you in basket ball but I sure as heck can make you laugh. No matter what. That's my skill. I'm stupidly funny. I am supportive and have a big heart and even bigger personality.

Hey that felt great to type out. 

[MirkerLurker she/her]

Good! 

[Wittles he/him]

2 hours ago, alittleinsane said:

Right, so if I wasn't feeling a little bit tired and kinda just done with life today (my grandparents are again pressuring me to have a bat mitzvah, i'm like "aren't i too old??" and they're like "ehhh, it's ok!" and while I do respect their religion, I'm agnostic and I just wish they'd stop with it, I put up with coming over to their house for holidays, and observing major holidays at home, but I just don't want any coming-of-age-type ceremony) I would quote the things I'm addressing, but out of laziness, everyone remember these things!

1. You are valid no matter how true to yourself you feel at the moment!

2. If someone else's words make you hate yourself, know that they're wrong. Other people do not have the right to make you dislike yourself in any way, and if they do, then according to the judgement of the oratrice mechanique d'analyse cardinale, they're wrong!

3. you're amazing, i'm amazing, we're all amazing! the only thing that makes someone less amazing is if they tell someone else that they aren't amazing, so by default we're all amazing

4. hugs

ah yes hugs, a complete, clear, and grammatically correct statement

oh yeah i forgor almost but i have a vent

  Reveal hidden contents

Mkay so as background knowledge, i have two little sisters, one of which is 11. I will call her L, it's her first initial. Whatever I think I'm good at (physically), she's better. I'm not bad, it's just that she's better. Like girlie's out here jumping horses and i'm struggling to canter. And to literally add insult to injury, she has a tendency to call me weak and pathetic to my face whenever she's mad, which had predictable results. More background info, my mom cannot swim, and has almost drowned several times. Me, my sisters, and my dad love swimming. It's one of the only sports/physical activities I'm actually confident in. During Spring Break I was swimming in the sea with some friends, and it was later brought to my mom's attention that I was struggling to swim back to shore. Literally the ONE time that happened. And now she's like "swimming lessons!" and it was just instant hurt. Like y'all know in books when it's like "xxx felt stung?" WELL I FELT STUNG Y'ALL, LIKE A BOOK CHARACTER. Anyways, typical to me, I excuse myself five minutes later and go to cry quietly in a lump underneath the covers because I'm oh so mature. And I'm thinking that L's going to find out that mama wants me to do swimming lessons, and she's gonna bully me for it. I have on several occasions been bullied by my little sister. She's stronger, faster, and more irritable than me, and I'm VERY good at making people angry...and being a sensitive baby, but to be fair it escalated to her hitting me with one of the ropes for horses. And eventually my mom's like "you can't just use this as an excuse to stay lonely and miserable in your room, being depressed" and I'm like "mama ily but literally last summer you listed the reasons I clearly didn't have depression, while I was crying and telling you I didn't want to be alive anymore, but ok diva you go do that" and she's like "well maybe I was wrong." and that's what actually makes me less sad kinda, in an insane-laughing-while-being-stabbed way, cause you are TWO YEARS TOO LATE, in the depression-department, I am fine now. I think

 

1. Thank you for the encouragement

2.*hug*, I sympathize

[WinnieThaWho He/Him]

6 hours ago, MirkerLurker said:

sometimes think (and I go back and forth on this, so chime in if you disagree, I won't be offended) that in a way, it's not lying, because what we're portraying is a choice. Our choice, to smile when we don't want to, or do things to make someone comfortable when we wouldn't do that ourselves. We are choosing to go against ourselves for the sake of someone else, and that choice is an honest part of who we are, and so that is what we are showing. "Pretending to be an extrovert" - it is a level of pretending, but that choice to put others first is honest, and a true part of who you are. So it may be pretending, but it's not necessarily lying...if that makes sense? It's not deceiving or tricking someone. 

Lying I feel is too strong a word, and to heavy of a negative connotation. The masking is solely trying to maintain a social persona. I never feel I am lying to myself or the ones I am engaging with during these exchanges. It's just being conscious and aware that this is what I am doing. I can only speak for myself obviously with this. 

I work in a field to where all the other employees around me have absolutely nothing in common with me, to the point to where I have to actively research the goings on in different sports and news just to maintain somewhat of a good work environment.  Again I do not feel that I am lying to them or myself. On the other side if that, I would feel disingenuous to ask for the same thing in return. 

All this to say also, that this particular facet of my life doesn't ever really feed into the depressive or anxious. Possibly because it has become natural at this point, but I find that more interesting. 

[Keke They/he]

1 hour ago, WinnieThaWho said:

Lying I feel is too strong a word, and to heavy of a negative connotation. The masking is solely trying to maintain a social persona. I never feel I am lying to myself or the ones I am engaging with during these exchanges. It's just being conscious and aware that this is what I am doing. I can only speak for myself obviously with this. 

I work in a field to where all the other employees around me have absolutely nothing in common with me, to the point to where I have to actively research the goings on in different sports and news just to maintain somewhat of a good work environment.  Again I do not feel that I am lying to them or myself. On the other side if that, I would feel disingenuous to ask for the same thing in return. 

All this to say also, that this particular facet of my life doesn't ever really feed into the depressive or anxious. Possibly because it has become natural at this point, but I find that more interesting. 

Yeah. 

So i used to think i had masks,

then i realized that i just have a lot of personality i use some here or there because of what the appropriate timing is.

[Bird Furious she/her/un/important]

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

[Wittles he/him]

3 minutes ago, Halcyon The Only said:

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

THAT'S SO REAL

[KnightSkye Reforged They/Them]

5 hours ago, Halcyon The Only said:

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

Yes.

[Keke They/he]

8 hours ago, Halcyon The Only said:

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

Yes i do. I feel that alot recently 

*hugs*

*huuuuuugggssssss*

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

10 hours ago, Halcyon The Only said:

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

yeah

*huuug*

[MirkerLurker she/her]

12 hours ago, Halcyon The Only said:

You know that weird feeling when it’s hard to believe happiness exists but you know you were happy just earlier today but you can’t imagine ever being happy so whats the point of living?

Congratulations, you've written out one of the textbook symptoms of "depression"! *fake cheery voice*

Also, yes. Quite familiar with that one.

14 hours ago, WinnieThaWho said:

Lying I feel is too strong a word, and to heavy of a negative connotation. The masking is solely trying to maintain a social persona. I never feel I am lying to myself or the ones I am engaging with during these exchanges. It's just being conscious and aware that this is what I am doing. I can only speak for myself obviously with this. 

I work in a field to where all the other employees around me have absolutely nothing in common with me, to the point to where I have to actively research the goings on in different sports and news just to maintain somewhat of a good work environment.  Again I do not feel that I am lying to them or myself. On the other side if that, I would feel disingenuous to ask for the same thing in return. 

All this to say also, that this particular facet of my life doesn't ever really feed into the depressive or anxious. Possibly because it has become natural at this point, but I find that more interesting. 

Neat! It is interesting. I'm glad that aspect doesn't feed into depression or anxiety for you - anything that we can use without negative impacts is great.
I have gone back and forth over the years on being anxious that I'm lying to people on this count. I have generally settled about where you describe  - it's a persona, it's part of me, it's not lying, it's fine. But I have struggled in the past with my brain's anxiety and depression telling me that I'm actually lying to everyone, that no one actually knows the real me, that I'm alone - following that kind of trail of thought, twisting it. And then I struggle with determining what's actually logical and what's not. It's nice to hear from others who do the same kinds of things but don't have the same thoughts.

 

13 hours ago, Thee insane said:

Yeah. 

So i used to think i had masks,

then i realized that i just have a lot of personality i use some here or there because of what the appropriate timing is.

Hmmmm yeah, kind of like that. Like, it is me, it's just the part of me I'm showing at the moment, as opposed to some other time when I'm showing a different part. That's an interesting way of looking at it.

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

*sigh*

I’ve been thinking about what happened in Spanish recently, (which still isnt resolved)

And

Im just… tired.

I don’t even know what I want my teacher to do - I have to work with someone, and tho not all of them are bullying me, I don’t feel like any of them would give me any say in the project.

I was thinking about it today… and I’m just… tired.

[Keke They/he]

2 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*sigh*

I’ve been thinking about what happened in Spanish recently, (which still isnt resolved)

And

Im just… tired.

I don’t even know what I want my teacher to do - I have to work with someone, and tho not all of them are bullying me, I don’t feel like any of them would give me any say in the project.

I was thinking about it today… and I’m just… tired.

*huge hugs* I dunno what to say to that. But hugssss

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

4 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*sigh*

I’ve been thinking about what happened in Spanish recently, (which still isnt resolved)

And

Im just… tired.

I don’t even know what I want my teacher to do - I have to work with someone, and tho not all of them are bullying me, I don’t feel like any of them would give me any say in the project.

I was thinking about it today… and I’m just… tired.

*huuuuuug*

I'm sorry you have to work with them

That's so not cool

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

23 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

*huuuuuug*

I'm sorry you have to work with them

That's so not cool

*sigh*
All my friends left after they met their graduation requirement.

[Keke They/he]

4 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*sigh*
All my friends left after they met their graduation requirement.

Oh no. *huggggsss* that sucks so storming bad. *huggggg*

[MirkerLurker she/her]

36 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*sigh*

I’ve been thinking about what happened in Spanish recently, (which still isnt resolved)

And

Im just… tired.

I don’t even know what I want my teacher to do - I have to work with someone, and tho not all of them are bullying me, I don’t feel like any of them would give me any say in the project.

I was thinking about it today… and I’m just… tired.

That's hard. I'm sorry. *hug*
Don't know if this is encouraging to hear right now, but it will end; it's ok to just ride it out as best you can.
Still sucks to have to get through it. 

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

10 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

*sigh*
All my friends left after they met their graduation requirement.

real

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

40 minutes ago, Through The Living Glass said:

real

41 minutes ago, MirkerLurker said:

That's hard. I'm sorry. *hug*
Don't know if this is encouraging to hear right now, but it will end; it's ok to just ride it out as best you can.
Still sucks to have to get through it. 

46 minutes ago, Thee insane said:

Oh no. *huggggsss* that sucks so storming bad. *huggggg*

 

…

the

the worst part is that this is a major portion of my final exam…

[Through The Living Glass She/They]

1 minute ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

 

…

the

the worst part is that this is a major portion of my final exam…

dude fr

Can you get a new group??

[Keke They/he]

Just now, SpiritOfWrath said:

 

…

the

the worst part is that this is a major portion of my final exam…

Oh my gosh

That's. Very very bad. If there is ANYTHING UNDER THE SUN I can help with let me know.

hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug