125257 Ways to Get People to Avoid You like the Plague

[Verdance he/him]

4 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

2808.

*breaks down door*

GOOOOOOOOOD MORNING LUTHADEL! On today’s news, 3 new House Lords dead and more expected to join them! Stay tuned for more on that later because first- we have our weather report, from a new member of the team, finding new work after that devastating hit from the thieving crews not too long ago - take it away, Lord Urbain

 

Yes, thank you.

You can expect light ashfall from around sunrise to noon, with temperatures reaching the high 80’s, with temperatures in the lower 90’s near Tresting

Later in the day, the ashfall is looking to pick up. Better get those brooms ready, because near the Ashmoubts, areas like Fadrex City and Urteau, four inches of accumulation is expected

Etc

Should I actually make a Luthadel news thing?

YES 

DEDICATED COSMERE NEWS THREAD

WEEKLY REPORT FROM ALL OVER THE COSMERE

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

49 minutes ago, Verdance said:

YES 

DEDICATED COSMERE NEWS THREAD

WEEKLY REPORT FROM ALL OVER THE COSMERE

that would be pretty cool

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

1 hour ago, Verdance said:

YES 

DEDICATED COSMERE NEWS THREAD

WEEKLY REPORT FROM ALL OVER THE COSMERE

1 hour ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

that would be pretty cool

My main concern is time

I have none

So I’d have to do it over the summer but that would be really funny

Sharder News Channel 17

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

Just now, ChipsAHoid said:

My main concern is time

I have none

So I’d have to do it over the summer but that would be really funny

Sharder News Channel 17

2809. Recruit me

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

5 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

2809. Recruit me

I was planning on getting a team of writers, each specializing on planetary News while I handle larger things of a Cosmere scale

 Make a weekly newsletter

But first

2810. If you want the J*b first comes the interview

“Which planet do you want?”

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

6 minutes ago, ChipsAHoid said:

I was planning on getting a team of writers, each specializing on planetary News while I handle larger things of a Cosmere scale

 Make a weekly newsletter

But first

2810. If you want the J*b first comes the interview

“Which planet do you want?”

2811. Bomb the interview.

"Patji. And God." Meanwhile, in my head, OH storm I MESSED UP

"I MEAN FIRST OF THE SUN AND WHATEVER ONE THE EMERALD SEA IS ON"

*runs away*

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

19 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

2811. Bomb the interview.

"Patji. And God." Meanwhile, in my head, OH storm I MESSED UP

"I MEAN FIRST OF THE SUN AND WHATEVER ONE THE EMERALD SEA IS ON"

*runs away*

*with the flick of my hand you reappear*

2812. *you are bound by thick ropes of dental floss*

”That seems fair. One may have multiple secondary planets

You are granted First of the Sun and Lumar”

[Denissimo He/him]

2813. Refer to salt as "sodium chloride". 

 

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, Denissimo said:

2813. Refer to salt as "sodium chloride". 

 

2814. Refer to DNA as Deoxyribonucleic acid

2815. Refer to ATP as adenosine triphosphate

2816. Refer to the Quantum Uncertainty Principle as QUP (pronounced 'cwup')

[Denissimo He/him]

Just now, KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren said:

2814. Refer to DNA as Deoxyribonucleic acid

2815. Refer to ATP as adenosine triphosphate

2816. Refer to the Quantum Uncertainty Principle as QUP (pronounced 'cwup')

Ah, so that's why people don't like me!
(An angel appears on my shoulder, a devil on the other). Angel: Bold of you to assume that is the only reason.
Devil: I'll sell you your soul back. Please. Heavens, (brielfy covers mouth in horror at the slur), I'll pay you. Just take it back. 

2817. Somehow find a way to consistenly wear a birthday hat. Backwards.
*Fabric of reality rips at the improbability*

[KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren He/Him]

1 minute ago, Denissimo said:

2817. Somehow find a way to consistenly wear a birthday hat. Backwards.
*Fabric of reality rips at the improbability*

2818. Nah QUP's got you covered

2819. Play Muad'Dib in Dune: Imperium Uprising and never use sandworms (I'm looking at you @Emperor Comatose)

[Denissimo He/him]

Just now, KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren said:

2818. Nah QUP's got you covered

2819. Play Muad'Dib in Dune: Imperium Uprising and never use sandworms (I'm looking at you @Emperor Comatose)

2820. Be the one who posted 2817.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

2821

own more than one house, but they are right next to each other and both really small.

[NerdSandwich she/her]

12 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

My main concern is time

I have none

So I’d have to do it over the summer but that would be really funny

Sharder News Channel 17

Oooh yes that's a good idea

Yeah from what you've said abt the homework your math teacher gives I doubt you have much time...

Yesssss summer why can't I time travel lol

Can I join the channel?

Don't care what planet, really, but not whatever the planet for Warbreaker is obviously

Edited April 20 by NerdSandwich

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

12 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

I was planning on getting a team of writers, each specializing on planetary News while I handle larger things of a Cosmere scale

 Make a weekly newsletter

But first

2810. If you want the J*b first comes the interview

“Which planet do you want?”

Ooo, can I join? I don't mind which planet

2811. Permanently freeze time on today so exams never end 

[Stardust She/Her]

12 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

I was planning on getting a team of writers, each specializing on planetary News while I handle larger things of a Cosmere scale

 Make a weekly newsletter

But first

2810. If you want the J*b first comes the interview

“Which planet do you want?”

YES I WANT IN 

ROSHAR IF POSSIBLE

2823: Go on and on and on about how people's typographical errors annoy you  like nothing else, then make  typographical errors yourself

Edited April 20 by Through The Living Star

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

2822

Checking and Reading a Shard Topic several times but not posting in it.

42 minutes ago, Through The Living Star said:

2823: Go on and on and on about how people's typographical errors annoy you  like nothing else, then make  typographical errors yourself

you put a double space between you and like

and make and typographical

[Stardust She/Her]

12 minutes ago, Through The Living Ketek said:

you put a double space between you and like

and make and typographical

Yes I know *evil smile*

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

19 hours ago, ChipsAHoid said:

*with the flick of my hand you reappear*

2812. *you are bound by thick ropes of dental floss*

”That seems fair. One may have multiple secondary planets

You are granted First of the Sun and Lumar”

2823. *is frozen in fear*

"Th-THaNkS!"

[ChipsAHoid He/Him]

On 4/20/2026 at 6:35 AM, KaladinsSenseOfHumourSpren said:

2814. Refer to DNA as Deoxyribonucleic acid

2815. Refer to ATP as adenosine triphosphate

2816. Refer to the Quantum Uncertainty Principle as QUP (pronounced 'cwup')

I do the first 2

On 4/20/2026 at 8:54 AM, NerdSandwich said:

Oooh yes that's a good idea

Yeah from what you've said abt the homework your math teacher gives I doubt you have much time...

Yesssss summer why can't I time travel lol

Can I join the channel?

Don't care what planet, really, but not whatever the planet for Warbreaker is obviously

The more the merrier

On 4/20/2026 at 12:42 PM, Ink and Embers said:

Ooo, can I join? I don't mind which planet

2811. Permanently freeze time on today so exams never end 

Yep!

On 4/20/2026 at 12:56 PM, Through The Living Star said:

YES I WANT IN 

ROSHAR IF POSSIBLE

2823: Go on and on and on about how people's typographical errors annoy you  like nothing else, then make  typographical errors yourself

Gotcha

I’ll make a pm

2824. Go spread the word my minions

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Heyyy I better not be considered a minion.

2825. Walk up to someone at a funeral for a guy you didn't know, touch them on the shoulder, and say "Hi, (my name here), I'm sorry about your dad,"

True story. Our names were the same and I guess we looked alike?

2826. Introduce yourself as 'Bob' without a K

2827. Frequently mention lice treatment (ok this is not a personal experience dw)

[Conure1243 He/Him]

2828. Introduce yourself as Bokb (Pronounced Bob, of course) with a K

[Verdance he/him]

2829. As a person diagnosed with ADHD, eat snacks with Red Dye 40 in them at 20:45 EST, then allow your family to suffer the consequences.

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

2830

Not speak in Keteks, in speech not.

[Denissimo He/him]

2831. Find a beach. Find a road by aforementioned beach, with lots of seagulls. Have a tub of fries. Feed seagulls, but NEVER ENOUGHT TO SATIATE THEIR HUNGER. They begin to gather, hungrier and hungrier. Then, at last, throw the entire tub of fries into a passing car.