Myth Taken (formerly Monkey Wrench)

[Talanic he/him]

Please critique this blurb - essentially it'd be what's on the back of the book. Said book is untitled but Myth Taken would comprise the first act, essentially.

*********

Most rough weekends don't wind up making you immortal.

Sam's weirdest Saturday ever saw her slip from the woods of Wisconsin to an ancient Sumerian giantslayer's enchanted home. A few new friends and a dead enemy later, she limps away as the newest of the Heroes of the Ancient Ways: the immortal guardians of humanity.

Her powers - absorbed from her first kill - are just barely beginning to grow, and she's not even sure what she's going to become - or if she'll have the opportunity to try. Sam's now a mystical beacon in the mortal world, drawing attention from anything that slips in from the other realms - because for the first year, anything that kills her will steal her newfound power.

On top of that, the end of her mortal existence doesn't mean her life has stopped. She just has to juggle her training with her job.

In the end, all she can do is hang on. It should get better - they've assured her, the first century is usually the worst.

Edited October 30, 2014 by Talanic

[Jo and the Bush all/any]

The Quotation at the Bottom should have some sort of Intro, like, "As the giant said, 'Don't worry lass'" 

 

 

The rest is good.

[Curiosity he/him]

Just a nitpick note: It's the Laws of Thermodynamics, not Newton's Laws. Newton's Laws have to do with motion and inertia. Thermodynamics has to do with energy and its configurations. The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only change states. It's very interesting, and I hope to read more!

 

Edit: It's fantastic the way you blend mythologies! Brilliant. I seriously hope that you'll keep writing this. And I second Joe's suggestion on adding a speaker  for that quote. 

Edited October 30, 2014 by Curiosity

[Talanic he/him]

While I could try to pass it off as the character's error, nope - it was mine.  I'm quite ashamed of messing that up.  Thanks for pointing it out, I'll make sure to correct it.

 

I'm editing the blurb with the latest version, which I'm still not quite happy about, but it's better.  The quote's no longer a quote.

 

Also, should I create a new thread for my NaNoWriMo posts, or just add them to this thread?

[Jo and the Bush all/any]

This thread has a limited number of viewers, But people often check the New Topic Box. So if you want to try to attract more viewers, create a new Topic, otherwise just leave it in here.