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Posted (edited)

I had the most random idea that I want to see happen. I want to see something where all of Kaladin's friends are trying to cheer him up, and just break into song using the live action Beauty and the Beast's song "Gaston". I do need to figure out some lines still, but this is what I've come up with so far (spoilerized for size):

Spoiler

[Syl(maybe):] Gosh, it disturbs me to see you, Kal'din
Looking so down in the dumps
Every guy here'd love to be you, Kal'din
Even when taking your lumps

There's no man in town as admired as you
You're everyone's favorite guy
Everyone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see why

No one's [        ] as Kal'din
No one's [        ] as Kal'din
No one's [                      ] as Gaston
For there's no man in town half as manly

[Random Lighteyed women:] Perfect, a pure paragon

[Syl(Maybe):] You can ask any Skar, Maps or Dunny
And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on

Who plays [       ] like Kal'din
Who breaks [        ] like Kal'din
Who's much more than the sum of his parts, like Kal'din

[Rock:] As a specimen, yes, he's intimidating

[Crowd:] My, what a guy, that Gaston

[Teft:] He needs more encouragement; hurry, Adolin!

[Adolin:] Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as him!

[Adolin runs off]


[Crowd:] No one fights like Kal'din
Douses lights like Kal'din

[Syl(Maybe):] In a sparing match nobody fights like Kal'din

[Teft:] When he fights he comes up with a shardblade
And foes in the fight say a prayer
He goes up and [something that rhymes with shardblade]
Then he fights to the death

[Skar:] Is he fair?

[Teft:] Everywhere

[Crowd:] No one hits like Kal'din
Matches Wit like Kal'din

[Syl(maybe):] In a hitting match, nobody hits like Kal'din

[Teft:] He's especially good at the sucker punching!

[Crowd:] Ten points for Gaston!

[Teft:] When he was a lad he ate four dozen eggs
Every morning to help him get large
And now that he's grown he eats five dozen eggs
So he's roughly the size of a barge!

[Skar:] Who has brains like Kal'din
Entertains like Kal'din
[Adolin comes sliding in with more encouragement]
[Adolin:] Who can make up these endless refrains, for Kal'din
I use Stormlight in all of my decorating

[Crowd:] Say it again
Who's a man among men?
Who's a super success?
Don't you know? Can't you guess?
Ask his fans and all his hangers-on
There's just one guy in town
Who's got all of it down

[Skar:] And his name's K-A-L-A

[Skar:] D

[Skar: ]I believe there's another D
It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate
And I've never actually had to spell it out loud before

[Crowd:] KALADIN!

Original lyrics from the live action Beauty and the Beast

I've made it so that Kaladin (which is 3 syllables) is Kal'din (which matches Gaston in syllables).

Edited by TheCollector
  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

I always imagined a bridge 4 mulan musical of ‘We’ll make a man out of you’ for the new recruits. Like an initiation. 

Posted
On 12/03/2022 at 5:08 PM, AerionBFII said:

I always imagined a bridge 4 mulan musical of ‘We’ll make a man out of you’ for the new recruits. Like an initiation. 

Lmao. This fits so badly. I can’t Unsee it now. 

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