Popular Post Eric Posted November 25, 2011 Popular Post Report Share Posted November 25, 2011 (edited) So we've been speculating on FTL and time travel methods using the Metallic Arts, but I'm thinking there ought to be some other interesting methods of getting around using those same powers. I figured a thread to discuss those in general was in order (plus, much like real technology, I think going over more basic things will help us progress to those greater theories). And since it's the holiday season, I decided to start it off with something incredibly silly. The Holiday Lord Ruler Ladies and gents, I do believe I've figured out who the Lord Ruler really was. Now, I know we all know his name and former occupation at this point, but that's not who he was. Those are just labels. Who he was requires a bit more in depth study of his actions and motivations. 1. He rewarded the good believers and punished the rest (both actively and passively). 2. He knew by the way you stood, spoke, and acted, whether you were being deceitful or honest. 3. He lived at what was once the far north of the world. 4. He was (pretty much) immortal. 5. He used slave labor to produce goods for the privileged few. The Lord Ruler was the Santa Claus of Scadrial. All he was really missing was a team of reindeer to take him around he world. Well, I happen to have a few ideas about that. So here's the very special holiday recipe for Hemalurgic Reindeer! You will need: 1 Sleigh 8 Reindeer (with tack and harness) 16 Steel Spikes (stolen A. Pewter, A. Steel) 8 Pewter Spikes (stolen F. Steel) 24 Atium Spikes (stolen A. Bendalloy, A. Chromium, F. Chromium) 8 Brass Spikes (stolen F. Bronze) 16 Bronze Spikes (stolen A. Bronze, A. Zinc) 16 Copper Spikes (Blessings of Presence) 8 Brass Spikes (stolen F. Zinc) With these abilities, the reindeer become able to burn Pewter, Steel, Bendalloy, Zinc, Chromium, and Bronze, and create Zincminds, Chromiumminds, Steelminds, and Bronzeminds. They may also be able to use these abilities on their own, without the aid of THLR, but he'll still want to take direct control and coordinate them. Brandon has confirmed that multiple bubbles stack. Thucydides hypothesized in another thread that the effects of Bendalloy would be bound up in the same frame of reference as the creator. Thus, THLR sets up the sleigh, has the reindeer begin Compounding speed, and begins burning Bendalloy after it is under way. Now the reindeer begin burning Bendalloy to stack the effects on THLR's sleigh, while burning Pewter and Compounding Wakefulness, Fortune and Mental Speed to keep up with everything else that comes into the bubble. With the frame of reference for Bendalloy centered on the sleigh rather than the ground, there is 9x the effects of normal Bendalloy, roughly 72x the rate of time inside as out. Reindeer can hit 55 km/h (34.2 mph), giving them an effective speed of 3,960 km/h... before taking into account burning Pewter or Compounding speed. The former easily doubles your speed (Vin and Kelsier managing horse-speeds suggests it may be more), while the latter gives 10x the benefit of straight tapping, which should bring it to 12x base speed (assuming that basic tapping doubles your physical speed). Meaning the actual speed from outside their frame of reference is 47,520 km/h. (That would be enough to lap the Earth's equator more than 28 times a day.) There! Now we have a perfectly effective Santa Claus sleigh! We're still not touching relativistic speeds, but we're definitely doing well! Edited November 25, 2011 by Eric 39 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deus Ex Biotica Posted November 25, 2011 Report Share Posted November 25, 2011 You. Win. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IvoryRoad Posted November 26, 2011 Report Share Posted November 26, 2011 I love you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcanist Lupus Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 This is brilliant. Also, even if the time bubbles are anchored to the Earth's frame of reference, you could achieve the same effect by flickering the bubbles of the different reindeer. It would be hard to manage, but theoretically possible. However, you don't explain how he fits down the chimney... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deus Ex Biotica Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 However, you don't explain how he fits down the chimney... Simplicity itself: he puts on earrings made of Gold, Aluminum, Steel, Cadmium, and Bendalloy (all filled with heavily Compounded amounts of their respective properties. Then, tapping all of those except Gold and Aluminum, he quickly dismembers himself, making sure all the pieces fall down the chimney. His head falls last, still alive due to the oxygen and nourishment he is drawing from the Cadmium and Bendalloy Metalminds. Once his body is all in a pile in your fireplace, he taps the Goldmind to heal back into a working body (his bright red outfit will hide the bloodstains on him), and he can burn Bendalloy to create a speedbubble and clean up the mess in the fireplace*. After that, he eats and milk and/or cookies available (good children make Bendalloy cookies for The Lord Santa), and sets out the presents for the good girls and boys. People tend to not notice him even if they are watching, since he fills his Aluminummind at 100% during all of this, but if the do notice, he immediately taps it fully, soon giving them to know that they've nothing to dread. Finally he goes back into the fireplace and, laying a finger aside of his nose, throws up a new speedbubble, dismembers himself again (this time, he Steelpushes the pieces up using various bits of his jewelry wrapped around them, and then Lurches his head up at the end), re-assembles on the rooftop, and goes to the next house. Merry Christmas to all! -- Deus Ex Biotica * Did your parents ever tell you to stop looking through the ashes in the chimney for Santa's footprints? It was because one of them had found there as a child, and was trying to spare you the trauma. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Posted November 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 (edited) Actually, I wonder if it might not be even simpler. Storing physical nourishment requires that you eat excessively to maintain your body mass, while storing strength decreases muscle mass. Storing Strength and Energy (without eating right away) together would make you rail thin, while burning pewter (and possibly tapping/compounding healing) would leave you capable of movement. While he might still need to dislocate a lot, I don't think actual dismemberment is necessary. And there are cookies at the bottom. Edited November 27, 2011 by Eric 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deus Ex Biotica Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Sure, go ahead and ruin my disturbing Christmas imagery with your logic. You get to murder almost 100 people to make your Reindeer, but I can't even have a few sentient Feruchemical heads dropping down chimneys. I see how it is. And, yeah, I considered that he could store Strength to get thinner (why does Strength alter musclemass, but Weight does not affect density?), but there's a hard limit on how much you can shrink (your skeleton), and almost none for how much you can dismember. I also have a theory for how he gets in if there's no chimney at all, which could also explain how he gets into other houses. He throws up a speed bubble (probably augmented by the nearest couple of Reindeer), taps his Copperminds for perfect knowledge of architecture and engineering, burns pewter, and then quickly dismantles a section of roof, builds a chimney of the proper size out of a supply of stone kept on the sleight for this purpose (he likes chimneys, alright?), and then goes down and does his work. -- Deus Ex Biotica 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Musicspren Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 There's another way; all he needs to do is talk to Hoid and he can be... The Lord Santa in Shadesmar! He goes into Shadesmar outside the house (making certain to keep all the cognitive presences of his presents with him), then returns to the physical realm inside. Same process, minus presents, to get back outside. Speaking of presents, how is he going to transport them? Are they stored in Shadesmar? I'm not sure how to transport that many using only the metallic arts. Also: With the frame of reference for Bendalloy centered on the sleigh rather than the ground, there is 9x the effects of normal Bendalloy, roughly 72x the rate of time inside as out. What makes you think the multipliers stack by addition? I would think that a bendalloy bubble inside a bendalloy bubble would be 8*8, so nine bubbles would be 89, or about 134,217,728x. Multiply that by 55 (base speed), and they're going at about 7 billion km/h when viewed from outside (Several times the speed of light as "viewed" from outside, but possible because they're only going 55 km/h inside.) Control might be an issue at that speed...but there is always compounded zinc. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcanist Lupus Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 (edited) Carrying presents is easy. Just put them in a metal sack, and Pull them along behind you. If you compound weight, you'll have more mass them them, and you will have no problems. Edited November 27, 2011 by Sir_Read-a-Lot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Posted November 28, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 28, 2011 What makes you think the multipliers stack by addition? I would think that a bendalloy bubble inside a bendalloy bubble would be 8*8, so nine bubbles would be 89, or about 134,217,728x. Multiply that by 55 (base speed), and they're going at about 7 billion km/h when viewed from outside (Several times the speed of light as "viewed" from outside, but possible because they're only going 55 km/h inside.) Control might be an issue at that speed...but there is always compounded zinc. At that point, you're better off with compounded Chromium. Especially given the effects on the surroundings made by something moving at such omnicidal speeds in atmosphere. It does certainly help explain how he knows if *everyone* is naughty or nice. He just writes notes to his past self after he's done delivering them, since he'll probably end up back in time. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deus Ex Biotica Posted November 28, 2011 Report Share Posted November 28, 2011 Also, I think all the reindeer need Bronzeminds, to avoid combusting when the speedbubbles drop. This isn't an issue for Wayne, but he's not going nearly as fast as they are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aranfan Posted November 29, 2011 Report Share Posted November 29, 2011 This is as hilarious as your usual fare WalkerBoh. Welcome to these forums! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Posted November 30, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 30, 2011 Thanks! A local gamer friend pointed this out to me after we were discussing an attempted conversion into the Storytelling game system by White Wolf. We've got a good crowd here, and I do so love an audience. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oudeis Posted September 22, 2013 Report Share Posted September 22, 2013 You forgot to mention the littlest Inquisitor, who never fit in because he had an extra iron spike directly through his nasal cavity, until one Rulersmas when the Deepness was so thick, no one could see through it! The Lord Santa, though, knew what to do. He put the Littlest Inquisitor in front of his reindeer, who used f-brass to heat his nose spike until it glowed cherry red, lighting the way! All good little Obligators were astounded to wake up the next morning and find that The Lord Santa had delivered their presents after all. It was a Rulersmas miracle! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scriptorian Posted September 22, 2013 Report Share Posted September 22, 2013 This...is...quite awful. But still so funny... So is there an Easter Mistwraith? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocHoliday Posted October 3, 2013 Report Share Posted October 3, 2013 Having read the OP, I am reminded of the great Rick James. "Cocaine is a helluva drug." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A Joe in the Bush Posted April 10, 2014 Report Share Posted April 10, 2014 (edited) TLR Has enough Skill and Power with Allomantic steel and Allomantic iron, that he can tell weather a Metal is in flesh or not, and What type of metal it is. So whenever he see's a chunk of Calcium stop being Inside somone, he knows that their tooth has fallen out, so at night he takes his sleigh, rides to the person, and takes their tooth, leaing a Boxing in it's stead. He's da Tooth Fairyas well! Also, sorry for Thread Necroizing. I couldn't resist. Edited April 10, 2014 by The Only Joe 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cromptj Posted April 10, 2014 Report Share Posted April 10, 2014 I think you're missing one thing. TLR did create some artificial reindeer and kept 8 of them nearby at all times. Why do you think that the eyespikes were long enough to stick out of the back of the head? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pathfinder Posted April 25, 2014 Report Share Posted April 25, 2014 Sorry to bring seriousness to a fun thread, but how would the Lord Ruler anchor the bendaloy bubble to the sleigh when Brandon said the bubbles are anchored to the planet? I'm not asking to disprove your concept, but to see if any new information that I haven't heard has arisen that would make this possible. I always like learning new things Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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