Death By Taxes

I've been on quite a reading bender lately; mostly catching up on Mistborn after reading all of the current Stormlight books. Other stuff I've read recently includes I Am Not a Serial Killer by Dan Wells. I finished this one in a single night; its fascinating concept/main character really stuck with me, and I found the whole thing rather brilliant (and I had a disturbingly hard time not finding the sociopathic protagonist likable in spite of him fantasizing about torturing/killing his friends and family multiple times throughout the novel, a credit to the writer's talent) Four Ways to Forgiveness by Ursula K. Le Guin. Honestly, this one left me with a lot more of an emotional impact than the more-acclaimed The Left Hand of Darkness. It's four short stories about love, hardship, life, and, well, forgiveness taking place on two alien worlds before, during, and in the aftermath of a devastating war between the two. It's got a lot to like! I'm currently reading The Far Pavilions by M.M. Kaye, as an effort to learn more about an era of history I know relatively little about (the British Raj). Next up on my docket are Edgedancer (okay, I didn't read all the Stormlight books), The Bands of Mourning (still recovering from that stinging ending of Shadows of Self), and then moving onto The Name of the Wind and then either Stormlight 4 (if it's out) or re-reading The Wheel of Time, which I started in middle school but never finished.

Overall, I liked this, and think it has potential to be pretty good. Obviously, it's an excerpt of an early draft, and so I'm missing a bit of context/there's a few grammatical quirks here and there. Big-picture, here's some things I noticed When you write out a character's thoughts in italics, it's a little distracting/redundant to also write "he thought'. It reads a little better without the double attribution. I had a bit of a hard time following this entire bit; the way it's worded is a bit confusing, and I have a hard time telling whether or not Aaron knew who Eldraguard was and how long he'd been held captive. I feel like the scene-setting/internal thoughts during this quip kind of interrupted the flow of dialogue. The exposition/thoughts in the middle don't all need to be exactly where they are; they might be best moved or removed. I wasn't really able to envision where the characters were throughout the entirety of the scene. Not sure if that was intentional or not. The magic system seems fascinating; I admittedly did not read the world-building document linked in your signature very thoroughly, but the idea of being able to infuse smoke with magic and alter states of matter seems interesting. I will ask though, is there a particular reason why magical energy is referred to as "lyfe"? I would assume some kind of significance seeing as how it's phonetically identical to "life"; that leaves me feeling like there's something potentially intriguing there I'm looking forward to reading more as it comes, and please let me know if my feedback was useful or not! I'm still practicing the art of giving good feedback.

Couple of other thoughts for you to flesh out your character (even if he's using a memory-suppressing additive, cool idea btw, it still sounds like he's a pretty heavy alcoholic) Alcohol-induced psychosis/dementia are definitely things caused by extremely heavy drinking; you may want to look them up If you character drinks heavily and daily, he may develop withdrawal symptoms, such as night sweats and the potentially-lethal delirium tremens (seriously, alcohol is nasty to withdraw from) From my personal experience with drowning sorrows, it doesn't really work the way it does in movies/cartoons; as others have noted, the depressing memories and thoughts don't go away. Rather, being drunk makes you More easily distracted from those negative thoughts Less able to think negative thoughts (as you begin having difficulty thinking in general) More sociable, which helps you make friends (which may only last the night) to help boost your spirits. However, being alone, undistracted, drunk, and miserable is actually rather awful, and far worse than being sober and miserable, as the loss of rational thinking makes it impossible to dismiss irrational fears/insecurities, and lack of inhibition makes you far more likely to do something stupid/harmful as a result of your negative feelings. Hope that helps!

I like to cook most things, aside from being utter garbage at baking anything more complicated than banana bread. My fiance has recently taken over cooking duties, so I don't get to cook as often as I did previously (a blessing more than a curse), but on the weekends I'll occasionally be inspired to cook something. I will say that I have a preference for Southeast Asian cuisine, as I find myself cooking a lot of fried rice and curries, and I would regard beef rendang as the best thing I ever cooked) Favorite Sanderson character is a really hard one; even picking one from each series is tough. I tend to like the morally complex characters (Lightsong, Dalinar, Kelsier, Elend/Vin by the end of Mistborn, etc.) and the comic characters (Breeze, Rock, Lightsong again) the most though. Even making that I list, however, I feel horrible excluding some favorites from it! Favorite Zelda game is another tricky one; I have the fondest childhood memories of Ocarina of Time, A Link to the Past, and Twilight Princess, but Breath of the Wild is pretty, well, breathtaking, although I'll admit I missed the themed dungeons of Zeldas past. Howl's Moving Castle is my traditional favorite, although I adore all of them and one of my settings was originally inspired in part by the nautical airplane-fantasy theme of Porco Rosso, and I recently watched Nausicaa which was phenomenal. I may in the future if I find myself with enough free time to commit to such a thing To everyone else who responded, thanks for the warm welcome! I'm looking forward to hanging out with everyone!

Greetings everyone! I was introduced to Brandon Sanderson about a year ago by a close friend outright begging me to read The Way of Kings, and since then I've devoured that as well as Words of Radiance, Oathbringer, the original Mistborn trilogy, The Alloy of Law, and Warbreaker. I've immensely enjoyed each work I've read, and also I've discovered the recordings of Sanderson's BYU lectures, which are also phenomenal and have helped me greatly in bolstering the quality of my writing. I've been a hobbyist writer on and off since middle school, with a primary interest in fantasy and science fiction with the occasional dabble in short-form horror (my attempts at long-form horror all become dark fantasy) and general rambling. I'm currently unpublished with no completed novels, but I plan on fixing both of those issues in the future Outside of Sanderson, I also enjoy the works of Tad Williams, Robert McCammon, Ursula K. Le Guin, Stephen King, and Hayao Miyazaki (yes, I know, not primarily a writer, but his movies capture the spirit of fantasy perfectly), and would consider them along with Brandon Sanderson to be the primary influences on my writing, along with the many hours of my childhood spent playing video games. The Legend of Zelda, Mass Effect, Dragon Age, and Bloodborne are some of my all-time favorites on that front. Aside from that, it seems like it may be prudent to share a little about myself while I'm here. I work as a technical solutions engineer at a healthcare IT company, so I know a little bit about medicine, a little bit about software, and a lot about their intersection (although if you need someone with in-depth knowledge of either, I'd ask a clinician/programmer, not me). In my "abundant" free time, I play guitar/percussion, scour the Internet for good music (wide variety of genres, prefer non-electronic, have recently been on a binge of metal/post-rock/piano jazz), indulge in tabletop RPGs, cook tasty food, hike, and dote on my lovely fiance. If you need input on any of those things or would simply like to chat, feel free to hit me up! I'm looking forward to being part of the 17th Shard, and to getting to know all of you!