So, let’s start with the genre in general. I’m reminded of a couple of parody songs that subvert the cliché of ‘love concurs all’’ in lyrics. The first is by Da Vinci's Notebook called “Title of the Song.” Admittedly, this one is more about the typical Boy-Band song structure, and not specifically about how love works. I’d have to plow through my music collection to find some 80s Hair Band lyrics to find the proper level of love bombast that I think you are rejecting. I’m a little too old to have ANY boy band stuff in my collection.
The other song is by The Folksmen called “Never Did No Wanderin'.” This one subverts the Happy Wanderer story songs to say ‘I never went anywhere and did nothing.’ In terms of content, this is probably closer to what you are after. Except, not as a parody. You seem to revel in the mundane, and that this is not only good enough, but also what’s needed in the long term.
This brings your lyrics closer to the poem by Margaret Atwood, “Variations on the Word Sleep.” My favorite line in it is:
I would like to be the air
that inhabits you for a moment
only. I would like to be that unnoticed
& that necessary.
So, if that is your intent, you succeeded admirably. And, as a married man, I can say the sentiment rings true.
I’d written a lengthy complaint about the structure of the Chorus. But after listening to the song while reading the lyrics, I realized I’d gotten it all wrong. Your balancing of wild reaction versus mundane reality hangs together well. I’m trying to find anything you could change, and I’m not finding it. Nice!
Musically, the chord progressions and the melody work fine. I’m not a composer, so I can’t really advise on that. However, it’s a catchy enough song.
That being said, I tried to play along on my ukulele. But you seem to be in a different key than the chords you provided. Are you using a capo?
And, yes, I will learn to play this song.
