QuirkyGrandpa

Hmm, perhaps I should clarify, that all quarrelling is silly, and it seems I always come back when it comes up. However, there is no limit on kindness, love and understanding <3. Let's all take a deep breath and keep open hearts, and open minds. ______________________________________________________ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ______________________________________________ ((((EDITING to add some helpful tips to get everyone back on track and feeling ready to both give and receive amazing critiques)))) This might be an amazing time for everyone to take a moment to reread the 'Critiquing Guidelines'. Both how to critique, and how to receive them :). My favorite line for how to give is: 'Be Willing'. Sometimes, you have to adjust your wording to be helpful for the particular artist/writer you are helping :). That willingness to reach out and embrace their story, and give them the words they need to improve is some of the most important writing of all. It's not always easy to focus wholeheartedly on the -writers- needs <3. However, it is also extremely rewarding. When you learn to adapt your approach, you expand your ability to write and connect with people (while also making new friends from all walks of life). And, as time goes by you will find that your approach, much like that beloved honey, is so much sweeter than vinegar. Remember, you are helping tell -their- story, not rephrasing it to be more like yours. My favorite line for how to receive is: 'Listen' It's so difficult, especially when, like now, there is conflict. Try and take a deep breath, and consider taking a day to respond (or not respond if you feel it is too confrontational, simply thank them for their time instead). Take what others have to say with a grain of salt, but remember that their feedback is still useful for its diversity alone. As someone reads your story they are going to miss things that you feel are obvious, or infer things you know are incorrect. It can be difficult not to try and point out these miscommunications :). Instead, make a note of what they missed, and consider that perhaps that is a spot where you can add detail, change your wording, or pull your reader in for a more immersive experience. Some other amazing resources on how to give and receive critique can be found on Deviantart! I'm part of a group called Project Comment, and I've found their amazing ability to both tell someone something doesn't look 'nice' while still giving the artist the tools they need absolutely astounding <3. When I first joined the group and submitted my first piece I was absolutely inspired by the love that could be felt through the careful word choices people used. Why? Because they cared about helping -me-. Here is my piece: Alexander the Drake. Which will be a character in the story I will be writing for you guys to critique (When I get up the nerve, still very anxious): And here is the Critique from whispywizbee: And, just want to end with some awesome pointers for how to receive feedback (Just switch out 'art' with 'writing' ) " Be appreciative and respectful of any comments you receive. Even if you already knew, or disagree with, everything they said, always reply to at least thank them for their time and effort. Not only cause they have at least tried to help you, also cause it will also put any more potential commenters at ease, rather than scare them away. It will help to give comments, too. Treat other people as you wish to be treated. Many will return the favour, and comment on your art, too. An extra advantage is that critiquing an art piece, and putting your thoughts about it to words, will also help you getting better at creating art yourself." Having some faithful watchers and friends on here can help a lot – INVITE friends onto these forums (seriously), would love to see more people Don't be afraid to ask. Many people will be glad to help. That doesn't mean you should go to everyone you can find telling them to comment on your deviations (or writings!), but if you see someone offering, don't let the chance pass you by! You have nothing to lose.

Even though I haven't been on here lately, @Jorville told me about 4TheWords, and I rather like it. I tend to agonize over EVERY detail, 4TheWords forces me to type quickly, and express myself in a manner of time that will actually get something done . I don't have time to make a Timeline, map, background story, history...I have to just roll with the punches. Also, might be handy for children learning to write for the first time like my kiddos. It's $4 a month after the demo.

I sort of dropped off the planet :(. My MIL and I were like oil and water but I still didn't take her passing well. Maybe cause the opportunity to get along better is gone : /. ANYWAY! On a much happier note, I'm back around. I will probably lurk around for a bit before I feel back up to giving some good ol' critiquing.

@Jorville @kais @industrialistDragon I think it is beautiful, that for the most part, this conversation has been kept so lovingly civil. In a world today where personal opinions and politics are destroying the harmony of love and friendship...it's a hopeful sign to me that people can have entirely contrary opinions and still be (mostly) respectful. However, I feel the brewing of underlying hostility and would caution peace over war with words in a place that is meant to critique in a way as to be uplifting. If you have more to say, perhaps private messaging would be a more appropriate setting :). @Jorville Babe, I'm so proud to see, that even in the face of adversity that you stand firm in what you believe is right. This can be incredibly difficult when colleagues, friends, and even strangers attempt to coral or use peer pressure to get you to change your social, physical, intellectual, emotional, or spiritual beliefs. Remember, you don't have to bend a knee but always keep your ears open, even for those you feel are in the wrong. This helps with a well rounded personality, and a well rounded writer too! <3 @Mandamon That was some great advice! Helpful, without beating the dead horse. This is NOT how I wanted to start my first day back . But, I always seem to come in when people are quarreling over silly stuff. Anyway, hi! I'm tentatively back, I haven't read anyone's stuff for a bit. Oddly enough, losing my MIL hurt me more than I thought it would : /. What a month!

Sorry about that! Apparently I left 17th Shard open and my toddler decided to type a windy message :3. I did read your story though and will work on a real response this evening. Update: Just wanted you to know that JOrville lost his mother, I did read your story, but I am trying to shield him from the fallout by getting everything planned and done for him. Thank you, sorry for the delay. I'll come back sometime this Saturday to post my thoughts.

The beatings will continue until the book is published and ratings improve.

Ahh, a fresh story. @Jorville, is patience a word used to describe me? Overall, I think this was pretty good. I definitely think you need to think about what -your- voice is as a writer and try to get that in there a little more. I want to feel like I'm there, so make me FEEL it. Also, YAY for first submission. I'm still not sure when I'll be able to write something :o. Never written -anything- before, but I'm thinking about it..

Awesome, I'm glad I stole onto hubbies computer and read your outline, it will make reading this more enjoyable :3. Once again, I tend to just jabber my way through, feel free to discard any suggestions I throw at you, and you don't need to respond unless you want to bounce some thoughts :). This is just for you, so you have something to think over. So I thought this was posted already on the weekend o.O, but somehow it never went through. So this is very late. I blame Rob, Rob was late and it became contagious.

Apparently I can talk forever about someone else's writing but have no ability at all to make my own .

Sure thing! I'm not going anywhere, and I like helping people think things through. Story pong till you find something you love more than you like.

I think I'll check out the podcasts, I know hubby listens to them a lot. I think my major issue is over thinking every single moment I am writing about. I spent two hours after determining how many moons a planet had and started to fret about its seasons and cycles, weather, and how all of this effected everything else before I realized I might be overthinking it to the point of insanity. I think I'll try making an outline type of deal like you did, and then trying to write again later next week when I have my thoughts just generally jotted down :o. Might help, and I'll listen to the podcasts in the meantime.

My main inspiration is you babe . Beating you I mean, at publishing a book first <3.