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I've figured out when Doors of Stone and The Winds of Winter are coming!


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Posted

At the end of The Stormlight Archive, Hoid will be punched by someone, and the punch will be so hard that it will throw Hoid right out of the Cosmere and into another writer's novel. After that, one fantasy novel a year will reveal that one of its characters is Hoid, and show his journey to get back to the Cosmere.

The first of these novels will be The Winds of Winter, and the second will be Doors of Stone. I don't know who Hoid is in ASOIAF, mostly because I've only read A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings, but I'm thinking maybe he's Varys? Correct me if you can think of a better character. Also, while I'm only two thirds of the way through The Name of the Wind, it's clear that without a doubt, Skarpi is Hoid.

Anyway, Hoid's jumping through other fantasy novels will end when Brandon starts the modern segment of Dragonsteel, at which point Hoid will make his triumphant return to the Cosmere.

This puts the release dates of The Winds of Winter and Doors of Stone at one year and two years after SA10 respectively, which is far earlier than anyone anticipated. I wonder when we're getting A Dream of Spring.

By the way, I know the ending of Doors of Stone.

Chronicler let out an uncharacteristic whoop upon making his last scratch. Kvothe's story was finished, and he had something to show the world.

"Oh thank you!" he exclaimed. "Now you legendary story can finally be told to the world! It was worth every moment it took to record it all!"

The innkeeper gave a hearty laugh. "Don't thank me!" he scolded. "I've just cheated you!"

"Out of what?" Chronicler asked, suddenly feeling terrified.

"Of the most valuable thing there is," the innkeeper replied, "time. I made the whole story up, just to see what your reaction would be. I'm not even Kvothe, although I do have his severed head in a box upstairs. Really, you should see the look on your face right now."

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Chronicler screamed. Then he slumped over, dead.

"Dramatic cremhole," Kote muttered. "I barely put any poison in his drink. Bast, check his purse, hide the body and then we'll get back to work."

The End

Enthralling, isn't it?

Posted (edited)

"Winds of Winter Release date?"

*reads*

...Lightflame! You have failed this forum! [/Arrow-voice]

I bet Hoid would be confused as all damnation on the Disc though.

Edited by Quiver
Posted

Hoid is more like master Elodin and Obryn Martell lol

But it wouldn't surprise me if Doors of Stone ended like that, I think Rothfus has lost interest.

Posted

Hoid returns to the cosmere in a gondor calls for aid moment leading an army of elves, dwarves and Harry Dresden?

Hoid and Harry Dresden meeting up? The Snark and Wit would never end, the Gatekeeper might even break the First Law just to end the insanity.

 

Oh lord Hoid meeting Demonreach.

Posted

In that case, Hoid would return to the Cosmere with a new talking skull. And Harry would probably make Hoid take the Star Wars movies back to the Cosmere.

Posted

That leads to Rosharans declaring "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possible imagine" before they get run through with a Shardblade, won't it?

Posted

Well Queen Mab can't get to Bob there...

I'd be more worried about Bob introducing Roshar or the rest the of cosmere to the concept of Internet Porn and Cheesy Romance novels.

Posted

Hoid is probably also Randall Flagg from Stephen King's everybookhe'severwritten. That was the first time I'd come across anything on the level of a Worldhopper - any time the initials RF come up in a book, I do a double take.

 

But Hoid wins out of the two of them. He's so much better characterised even though he hasn't taken the forefront of a novel yet!

 

Imagine the carnage that a weary Harry Dresden would unleash. No innocent building in Roshar would withstand his might!

Posted

The fact that you can begin one of Harry's novels and he starts off with the line "The building was on fire and it wasn't my fault." means that he'd give the stormfather a run for him money.

Posted

 

Quote

Chronicler let out an uncharacteristic whoop upon making his last scratch. Kvothe's story was finished, and he had something to show the world.

"Oh thank you!" he exclaimed. "Now you legendary story can finally be told to the world! It was worth every moment it took to record it all!"

The innkeeper gave a hearty laugh. "Don't thank me!" he scolded. "I've just cheated you!"

"Out of what?" Chronicler asked, suddenly feeling terrified.

"Of the most valuable thing there is," the innkeeper replied, "time. I made the whole story up, just to see what your reaction would be. I'm not even Kvothe, although I do have his severed head in a box upstairs. Really, you should see the look on your face right now."

"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Chronicler screamed. Then he slumped over, dead.

"Dramatic cremhole," Kote muttered. "I barely put any poison in his drink. Bast, check his purse, hide the body and then we'll get back to work."

The End

 

Umm... That does not sound like Patrick Rothuss a all. First, the writing style is different. Patrick's style is more... flowery. Also, the ending wouldn't make sense. Why wouldn't the box in Kvothe's room that apparently holds his head open? You don't need a magic box to hold a head. Why would this phony Kote even know, much less be a master of a goat-fairy-thing? I think it may be a prak or fake.

Posted

Pffft. Harry Dresden.

 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm sure he's be quite interesting. I've only read Storm Front, and that title alone ties him to the Stormfather.

 

But if I want a wizard to get to Roshar, then I'm not asking for any imitations.

I'm just asking for John bloody Constantine.

Posted

Umm... That does not sound like Patrick Rothuss a all. First, the writing style is different. Patrick's style is more... flowery. Also, the ending wouldn't make sense. Why wouldn't the box in Kvothe's room that apparently holds his head open? You don't need a magic box to hold a head. Why would this phony Kote even know, much less be a master of a goat-fairy-thing? I think it may be a prak or fake.

 

Of course it's now flowery! Rothfuss hasn't finished editing Doors of Stone yet, so the ending was still in very rough shape when he showed it to me. It'll look much better in the finished version.

Posted

 

 

Of course it's now flowery! Rothfuss hasn't finished editing Doors of Stone yet, so the ending was still in very rough shape when he showed it to me. It'll look much better in the finished version.

Wait, Patrick showed that to you? Wow. You're special. How did he show you it (personally or online)?\

And, as Kobold King put it,

 

 

Never before have I so desperately wished a Kingkiller theory was wrong. 
Posted

Wait, Doors of Stone might release this century?! I was hoping for a Winds of Winter release sometime this decade (even George R.R. Martin is more punctual than Rothfuss...), but I guess that's out of the window now! 

 

Wait, if Hoid travels through ASOIAF, does that mean Kvothe versus White Walkers! Now we know exactly how the Night's Watch will counter the coming invasion of undead: Hoid will Elsecall them all into the Commonwealth, whereupon Kvothe will speak the Name of Fire and end them all.

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