Remixt Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 (edited) Hey guys! I'm working on a novel. If you have the chance I would love some feedback on my introduction to my book. It's called "The Spell Thief" If you don't have time or for some reason don't want to read it, then no big deal. I just thought I would try to get as many sources of feedback as I can. I appreciate your input Chapter1.docx Edited August 25, 2016 by Remixt 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Straw he/him Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 Very good! It would help if you added a sense of environment to the chase, things like "He turned a corner at lightning speed" or "The yelling of the guards was the only noise in the city" or "He dived behind a doorway and opened the scroll." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remixt Posted August 24, 2016 Author Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 13 hours ago, Straw said: Very good! It would help if you added a sense of environment to the chase, things like "He turned a corner at lightning speed" or "The yelling of the guards was the only noise in the city" or "He dived behind a doorway and opened the scroll." Thanks for the feedback I appreciate it! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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